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Thread: Anxiety, depression, laziness...Can the nameless wonder change? page 168

  1. #1671
    NoSaladWithoutMeat's Avatar
    NoSaladWithoutMeat is offline Senior Member
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    I can't believe you can make your bf watch supernatural with you.
    Win ;D
    "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
    -Raymond Peat, PhD

  2. #1672
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    *rewinds*

    WAIT ARE THERE NEW EPISODES?!!?!?!

    *breathes into a bag*

    Oh. You mislead me Y_Y
    "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
    -Raymond Peat, PhD

  3. #1673
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    namelesswonder is offline Senior Member
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    Hehe, yes, still on Netflix. A few more seasons to go!

    Weekend recap: I am soooorreeee. Biking last week plus 20 min and thigh and butt Kettleworx video on Thursday, then swimming yesterday. Feels good though. I should sleep amazingly tonight. Many drinks were had. It was all around a good time, though I started to get fairly anxious last night, probably from so much drinking and not the best food (though I was probably 80% primal, had 1/2 a cookie and dinner Friday was steak quesadillas, also all that alcohol). We got through it. Boyfriend drank more than made me comfortable on Saturday, we talked about it today and things are good. Back to no drinking at all, probably for both of us.

    Now to rest and nibble and wait for Monday.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  4. #1674
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    Soreness makes for hotness.

    What season are you on? Cause it starts out blah, gets amazing, stays amazing and then goes down hill, with a slight bang at the end of the last season. But I should stfu *duct tapes mouth*
    "The penis is the male animal-flower, a soft-firm dildo, a warm dream."
    -Raymond Peat, PhD

  5. #1675
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    Ramblings, Ravings and Rants.: Links for a Monday

    Sleep: I slept fine at the lake house, though continued to wake up fairly early, as I do during the week. The latest I actually slept in was probably 8 AM. I had a hard time falling asleep last night despite being exhausted. I'd had coffee Saturday and Sunday morning, I wonder if it's just too much for my system. Well, I won't be having any for August, I'm including that in my Whole30. Boyfriend has work tonight, so I'm not sure if I'll be able to sleep before he gets home.

    Food: I'm having a lot more dairy than usual these next few days, as well as the past few days. I had French vanilla organic yogurt made from whole milk (from Trader Joe's) to have something sweet while I was at the lake house. I finished it off after we got home yesterday. I also had some muenster with chicken (that was my lunch on Saturday) and cheese on my burger patty. We had another meatzza last night. More muenster with chicken for lunch today. I might just throw out the rest, if Boyfriend doesn't want any cold cuts to go with it, when Wednesday comes around. I had some almonds over the weekend as well. There are still some left, and I think I will bring a small portion with me to have with lunch this week until they're gone. If I have them in the evening at home, I will eat too many.

    Exercise: This weekend, I swam and had a lot of sex I'm pretty sure the latter is why my abs are sore. If I feel like biking tonight, I will, and I'll save any bodyweight or kettlebell stuff for tomorrow or later in the week. I feel better today than I did yesterday, but don't want to overdo anything. I might swim this week if it gets hot enough, since my parents are on vacation and I need to swing by to clean the pool/run the pump/feed the cat anyway. Since I started exercising more over the past few weeks/month, I've noticed that it's easier for me to remember to stand and sit up straight. My posture is worst when I'm at home because I go into relaxation mode. I've also noticed that my laptop bag (a thick backpack with padding, I prefer it over a messenger style bag when I ride the scooter) feels lighter to me now than it used to. This is really good, since eventually I will need to bike while wearing it.

    I organized my music a little this weekend and am going to come up with a couple of workout playlists, so I can get through some of those Jillian Michaels videos without wanting to strangle her (I'll play them on mute and just use the video as guidance). Eventually, I want to write down the exercises and just keep a watch nearby to do them without visual prompts. I'm thinking of trying out some P90X workouts, though I'm sure I won't be able to follow along for the entire workout (I'm guessing it's 50 min).

    Mood/Brain: Aside from some anxiety Saturday night, I had a great weekend. I feel like I've come quite far to be able to engage with people I don't know/don't know well and have a good time without getting stressed out. I was also very proud to feel uncomfortable, but recognize it, let Boyfriend know, and wait till we were both sober and feeling okay to talk about it. I felt like I expressed my concerns fairly and without making him feel awful about making mistakes. It felt productive and effective. He has been very obviously supportive of me lately (as opposed to normally, when he's supportive through more actions than words), I don't know if it's just part of a response to the discussion we had a couple of weeks ago. I appreciate it though and want to let him know that. It feels really good to have him comment about how my driving has improved when I drove the entire way home (4 hrs, 220 miles) with one rest break for water. That is still definitely my driving limit, my brain felt mushy afterwards!

    Supplements: Morning - 2 Candex, L-Glutamine, 6000 IU Vitamin D in water, also Zyrtec generic for allergies, and Alive for women multi with food. A small spoonful of raw, local honey when I remember. Evening - 2 Candex, L-Glutamine in water before eating. I take some probiotics at either point in the day, when I remember, but should probably take them twice a day to make sure I've got plenty of good bacteria going in. Yeast symptoms cleared up almost entirely within two days of starting Candex again, and I imagine the slight acne flare-up will go away quickly, since I won't be consuming much alcohol for a while.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  6. #1676
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    Quote Originally Posted by NoSaladWithoutMeat View Post
    Soreness makes for hotness.

    What season are you on? Cause it starts out blah, gets amazing, stays amazing and then goes down hill, with a slight bang at the end of the last season. But I should stfu *duct tapes mouth*
    4? I think?
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  7. #1677
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    Other thoughts for the day:

    -Swimming in the fresh water lake again was AWESOME. My hair got super soft and shiny without all the hardness of my usual water exposure. I was sad to come home and shower here again.

    -Body image: My biggest hurdle in accepting my body is my smallest asset: my boobs. Lately, it seems like they're getting even smaller. I'm not sure I'm losing body fat or gaining muscle, maybe it's just a proportions thing, but they are small anyway. I was casually admiring the figure of one of the chicks at the lake house over the weekend (someone I'd never met before) and when I started to feel really self-conscious, I felt so awkward about my body, despite having been in a bikini for most of the day. I took solace in a couple of things, first, that I have much better posture, second, that I am much stronger than her (she was playing with a bochie ball like it was a weight, I picked it up and it was under 5 lbs, which is small fry for me since I usually work with my 15 lb kettlebell), and third, that even she has stretch marks. She is small, maybe 5'2", and has a well-proportioned figure, and could not be called skinny (definitely a healthy amount of fat, no belly pooch, curves with no rolls), and definitely knows how to dress to suit her figure. It wasn't a style I would ever wear or usually find attractive, but it really suited her. If I find clothes that suit my figure (or make some), I think that will help with how I view my body and present myself. People seem to think I am a lot more confident than I am because of my posture, which is pretty cool.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  8. #1678
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    I also can't find a style of clothing that I feel suits me. I find stuff I really like, but I'm not very confident wearing it because it doesn't seem appropriate for me, I guess. I'm not a dress girl, that's for sure. I don't like wearing dresses, but I admire dresses and wish I could pull them off. Bikinis too. lol

    Boobs... boobs suck. They always do the exact opposite of what you want them to do - if you want them to shrink, they won't. If you don't want them to shrink, they will.
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)




  9. #1679
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    Honestly, I think the best kinds of shirts on me are any shirt...as long as I don't wear a bra. I like my natural breast shape, but being in fairly cold areas (the air conditioned office) most of the time means I don't want to get away with it. I've taken to wandering around the apartment in bandeau-style bras when I'm home, or just in my underwear (we really need curtains, we have pull-down curtains and they're always up a bit for the windows to be opened haha). It's really comfortable, but I have to remember to keep a light dress nearby to pull on in case someone rings the doorbell. I have broad shoulders and lot of styles meant to flatter broad shoulders don't work well for small chests as well. Time to do more self-educating on complimentary fashion styles. Generally, exposing my shoulders looks good, but the cut of the straps (or lack of straps) has to be particular to not make my shoulders look too square.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  10. #1680
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    Primal Blueprint Expert Certification
    You can go to myvirtualmodel(dot)com to design your figure and then "shop" for clothes that way. It's actually pretty neat, but I think in order to "try on" certain styles or brands, you have to pay.
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)




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