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Thread: Anxiety, depression, laziness...Can the nameless wonder change? page 157

  1. #1561
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    namelesswonder is online now Senior Member
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    Embarrassing significant others is the stuff life is made of.

    Okay, not really.

    Day-dreaming about what to spend my $25 Amazon gift card on. Could get myself some protein powder (which I would use only a few times a week when I'm lazy about feeding myself/have not planned well), or at least pay for part of a 5lb container. Could pre-order a book I want that comes out in the Fall, but that leaves me $13 leftover. Could get a case of coconut milk, but not sure I really want that, though it would last a while.
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  2. #1562
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    Weekend plans:
    -Really want to fix my roots, but not sure how much I want to invest in bleach right now. The developer is cheap, about $5 for a larger bottle that will last through several bleachings, but the powder buckets are around $20, as opposed to a few bucks for a one-time-use packet. I know in the long run, it would be more cost effective to get the bucket. I'm just going to use the rest of the pink I already have, since a new bottle would be about $10 (even though I would prefer the color that Manic Panic or Special Effects have). Anyway, I am going to head to Sally's Beauty Supply as soon as they open Saturday morning.
    -My dad and I basically drafted a desk for my mom last weekend and made measurements, so I think we're going to Home Depot tomorrow to pick up supplies and start trimming. We need to decide on a height for the desk top. The ideal height runs into a problem with the existing ethernet port on the wall, it goes straight through the middle of it. So we could move the port up or down, which isn't a huge deal, but we have to make sure to patch the hole left behind (my dad is not known for that kind of thing). The lower height (28" I think) is perfect for typing on a laptop on the desk. The higher height, that would clear the top of the port, is ~30", and nice for being able to stand and sort things at the desk, but too high to type on a laptop comfortably. I think my dad is opting for moving the port and keeping the lower height.

    Last night: We went to a burger place that has gluten-free buns. I was too nervous to ask what kind of alternative flour they use, but I'm pretty sure it was soy. Gas and bloat is still working its way out. They had grass fed beef from Vermont, so I got that (figured I might as well splurge while I'm splurging, because that was $1.80 extra). It was terrible. The beef was very chewy and gray, not at all juicy (ordered it medium). Maybe I should have said something, but again, too nervous. My therapist often asks me, "what's the worst thing that could happen?" But even if it's nothing really big, I still don't want to do it.

    I'm not really looking forward to therapy today. I just feel annoyed about it, because I know I will just be talking about feeling annoyed all week with this woman and stupid computer I've been dealing with. How is that productive? And I'm still worrying about spending $80/mo for therapy when that money could be going towards our winter heating or a washer/dryer.

    Possibly will write more after therapy.
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    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  3. #1563
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    Mwahahah nevermind on the hair, using my Amazon gift card for the bleach products!
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  4. #1564
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    Ah wise student, the voice of budgeting reason was quiet and let the wise student navigate the hair care products purchasing gauntlet. The voice of budgeting reason is pleased.
    If I just said LOL, I lied. Do or do not. There is no try.

  5. #1565
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    And lo, the voice of budgeting reason has spoken unto me and it has said, "Woman, keep your overtime." And it was good.
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  6. #1566
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    Here's a non-confrontational way to get your point across to the restaurant: Write a letter. Costs just 42 cents to send and this small step may help you learn how to speak up and confront a problem in a way that does not increase stress too much. You can explain clearly what the problem was and that you will not be back - for a very long while (at least this is my policy when disappointed). I don't say much about food at restaurants either as I don't want them then messing with my food as pay back.
    Glad you figured out your hair dilema as I hate roots growing out also. I usually streak color to avoid it being obvious for this reason. Have fun with it whatever you decide!

  7. #1567
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    Quote Originally Posted by namelesswonder View Post
    And lo, the voice of budgeting reason has spoken unto me and it has said, "Woman, keep your overtime." And it was good.
    The voice issueth a decree: Behold! If thoust readest this, then thou shalt use the word lo in normal conversation before the sun seteth in the west!
    If I just said LOL, I lied. Do or do not. There is no try.

  8. #1568
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    Good, then I have a lot of time since the sun sets fairly late these days =P

    Dammit, Boyfriend won't be home by then! Gotta find an opportunity at work!

    And no cheating as a substitute for "low".

    Therapy was good. I am cutting back to every other week. It's still really weird to have my therapist tell me I'm doing good work! I feel very comfortable with how things are now, and very happy that I finally realized the reason why therapy hadn't worked for me past: I would talk it out enough to get past the initial stress of the situation, then run away from talking more, but now I'm identifying COPING MECHANISMS to try and work past tough situations all on my own in the future. Like a well-functioning person could do.
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  9. #1569
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    Quick weekend check-in: Couldn't get a hold of family, so desk-building project does not seem to be happening. SUPER tired, probably from late bedtime as well as a tour of the Sam Adam's brewery this morning (so beer on a mostly empty stomach... well, I'd had some bacon, since that was the only thing getting Boyfriend out of bed). It was fun to see our friends and we got invited to the lake house that I went to last year (Boyfriend was in Costa Rica for a bachelor party at the time), which is in 3 weeks. I could totally take a day off so we don't have to drive up Friday night, but am feeling nervous about asking for time of, even though I'm sure it'll be fine. I was also feeling VERY anxious because I know they tend to do a lot of drinking at the lake house. I didn't do much last year and still had a really fun time. Boyfriend told me (when I brought it up when we parted company with the rest of the gang) that he would not be drinking much, but I will probably ask him about coming up with a code word or something so if I get nervous or uncomfortable with him drinking, I can let him know without him feeling embarrassed or making a thing out of it.
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    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  10. #1570
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    I would love to tour the Sam Adam's brewery! That's awesome! The closest thing we have is the Jack Daniel's Distillery and I've been there probably 6 times.

    I don't know about the code word thing. When I'm drunk and having fun with other folks the last thing I want is someone telling me to stop or slow down. Maybe Boyfriend is different.
    If I just said LOL, I lied. Do or do not. There is no try.

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