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Thread: Anxiety, depression, laziness...Can the nameless wonder change? page 155

  1. #1541
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    I'm so happy boyfriend got a job! I mean, your boyfriend, not mine.
    If I just said LOL, I lied. Do or do not. There is no try.

  2. #1542
    namelesswonder's Avatar
    namelesswonder is online now Moderator
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    Aw, is your boyfriend still jobless? Hope he finds something soon!
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  3. #1543
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    cori93437 is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by namelesswonder View Post
    Maybe his #1 issue is getting over himself. He hates dealing with the VA, but really the only thing stopping him from seeking help is himself. We'll see how things change as he starts working more, since he's only worked 2 days at the jorb so far. I think he would need to get evaluated, don't think there would have been any reason for him to be rated for mental health care when he was still in.
    I gotta tell you... I HATE dealing with the VA. But I've been doing it for 12 years.

    The basics of it is that once you wade though all the paperwork (sometimes twice), and do a lot of waiting, then you get in to see a doc and get established... it's not so bad.

    I fall in and out of the system some because even though I'm 100% covered I also have private health insurance through my husband and it's a pain in the ass to go to the VA for stuff I can see someone locally for on hubs Ins. But I do see them exclusively for my service connected disability issue... which involved surgeries every so often to keep me ticking... if I didn't do that I probably would have hit my lifetime spending cap for husbands private Ins by now.
    I also spent time in counseling for PTSD issues and depression with the docs at the VA. And they patched me up pretty good.

    Keep encouraging BF to wade through the murky waters of VA paperwork purgatory. It eventually gets better.
    “You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.”
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  4. #1544
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    Journal on depression/anxiety
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  5. #1545
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    namelesswonder is online now Moderator
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    I am so ready to be done with this fucking computer, but it just keeps dragging on!
    -need to make sure all relevant data is backed up (have most, I think, but it's a VERY slow process)
    -copy data to new machine
    -get IP of new machine & send info to two parties so they can set up a different data transfer to new machine's secondary drive (so also, set up secondary drive in new machine, but can't do that until I'm done with a drive on OLD machine because we don't have spare SATA cables)

    I took Tryptophan last night and Tyrosine this morning. I think the Tryp was a mistake because I was anxious this morning and now I'm stressed and depressed. I REALLY don't want to have to deal with this computer anymore. I put in 11 hrs yesterday trying to fix the fucking thing. I'm fed up with no one having answers for me and stepping in to say "Hey, you should do this or that or GO HOME ALREADY." Frankly, just want to cry about it.

    IF I'm lucky, I won't have to stay late today. I'm torn between taking the OT that I accumulated yesterday and taking a few hours off on Friday (when I have therapy) so I stay at 40 hrs and have a little break.

    Is it tomorrow yet?

    I have a bill for the dentist and doctor (for annual physical), but both are fairly small. They use up the last of my FSA, however, so that means all therapy from this point out is not my pre-taxed pool that I am paying off over the whole year, it's straight from pocket. Not sure I'm willing to shell out $80/month for it. So I do want to cut it to every other week BECAUSE DAMMIT I WANT HEAT THIS WINTER. If I'm super careful, I think we can afford to fill the tank next month. Therapy wouldn't really affect that much, but I'm also feeling fairly panicked about needing all the money I can get. Guess that's something to discuss on Friday.

    I did the math and it seems like I should be able to save a lot this month, almost enough to fill the tank, or do a partial fill. Then we could maybe even get a friggin' washer and dryer this Fall. What am I forgetting? Rent, groceries, loans, utilities... Right, then maybe $100 for supplements (already spent $42 for a new yeast control thing, still struggling with that on and off) and odds and ends. Groceries could be minus up to $200 since we spent so little last month.

    No food yet today, did not have time after I got up and had to get in early to deal with this AWFUL AWFUL computer. So no lunch either. I'm inclined to suffer so I can stay mad instead of sad.
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  6. #1546
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    drssgchic is offline Senior Member
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    Yay for the job!
    Boo to the computer!
    You have a whole hell of a lot on your plate right now and you're dealing. Totally a Yay!
    (good luck with the budgeting, but once Boyfriend gets a paycheck, that will help a lot)
    http://cattaillady.com/ My blog exploring the beginning stages of learning how to homestead. With the occasional rant.

    Originally Posted by TheFastCat: Less is more more or less

    And now I have an Etsy store: CattailsandCalendula

  7. #1547
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    Orrrrr, you could just keep the overtime and not have to worry about budgeting as much...just the friendly voice of reason speaking.
    If I just said LOL, I lied. Do or do not. There is no try.

  8. #1548
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    I pissed off Boyfriend because I was calling to make sure he made it to class, but it's not until 5-something. "Why were you calling to make sure I made it?" "Your track-record wasn't great last semester so I wanted to make sure you'd gotten up." "Thanks, that was pretty insulting." Okay, maybe not phrased the best, but seriously, that is a legitimate concern considering how much he skipped last semester! I tried to explain that it was habit, for me to worry about him making it to class, and he thanked me for making sure he made it and ended the call. So maybe he understands, but is pissed at how I worded it (definitely the initial response), or pissed at himself that I had a reason to worry. I don't know, but now I'm a bit upset (and frustrated that if today had not started off on the wrong foot, I probably would not be AS upset).

    Computer things are working out about as well as they could be at this point, though it still sucks majorly for the user (because she has to reconfigure all of her software, no one else uses it in the office). I should be able to leave on time (and I think I will keep my overtime). At least I will have the apartment to myself for a while since Boyfriend will be at class tonight so I can have some decompressing time without worrying about snapping at him or anything. Aside from making dinner and tidying up, I don't know what I'll do!

    Even when Boyfriend starts getting paid, he's not going to have much extra money to work with. We'll have to decide how we want to split expenses going forward. We could probably adjust things so that we both have the opportunity to save as much money each month, after the essentials. I earn $6/hr more so that means I would be covering more. If I'm going to be 100% in charge of groceries (which may make up the difference), I'm much more inclined to place limits on certain purchases (the junk he eats for lunch), however I don't think that would go over well. He agrees that needs something more filling (and healthy) for lunch when he works afternoons into the evening and won't be able to eat until he gets home late. Ramen isn't cutting it for him, and BOY am I glad about that.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  9. #1549
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    "I called because I care about you, idiot. Deal with it." Too harsh? I can never tell.

    Glad the computer issue is fixed, and, yeah, padding the paycheck with some OT is probably a good idea.

    Heh- it sounds like taking over groceries will be good. You WILL feel better because I'm only going to feed you feel-good foods! So there!
    http://cattaillady.com/ My blog exploring the beginning stages of learning how to homestead. With the occasional rant.

    Originally Posted by TheFastCat: Less is more more or less

    And now I have an Etsy store: CattailsandCalendula

  10. #1550
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    It has taken us many, many years to learn how to speak to each other. How to get the point across without it being misconstrued. Like this. "You are a bitch." You are acting like a bitch". "You are an asshole." "You are being a total asshole today."

    They say totally different things. He probably took it as you nagging instead of being helpful. Ask him if he'd like you to call him. If he says no, fine. If he says yes, he can't complain.
    Of all the paths you take in life, make sure a few of them are dirt.

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