Anxiety, depression, laziness...Can the nameless wonder change? page 154

[namelesswonder]

Phew, crock pot cleaned out easily, but sadly, no bone broth. Maybe it's for the best, it was just a regular old rotisserie chicken from the grocery store (though no spices or anything, twas plain). I shall make my own chicken soon enough. This weekend, I need to get butter, but that's really it for groceries. I'm thinking about getting some more carrots, baby onions, and stock for a stew, and maybe some regular onions and a chicken from Trader Joe's for a dinner next week. THEN I can make bone broth. Okay, so I also need some breakfast sausages.

Therapy was interesting. She convinced me not to skip a week yet. I think it's probably best that I face my discomfort with going every week and talk about how I'm feeling guilty about going. Part of it is because I can afford to go while Boyfriend cannot, and he potentially needs it more than I do. I'm used to "dealing" (not really dealing, but surviving) with tons of mental stress, but this experience of anxiety and depression is pretty new to him.

Last night, Boyfriend dropped his food on the floor. Kinda fell under the couch, so yeah, no saving it. He was so mad, he wrenched his back lifting the couch to clean up. I ended up ordering him a feel-better pizza and got to snuggle with him while he was all high on Vicodin. I do love that part of him taking Vicodin (and he knows it).

Slept poorly. Too hot, then switched to AC room and dragged Boyfriend to bed. Then woke up sometime around 6AM. I got up at 6:50. Got to work early instead of making lunch, just was not feeling like food, though I did have a 3-egg omelette.

Still dealing with the stupid computer from hell that I was fixing 2 weeks ago and again yesterday. The hard drive IS busted (take that, cat-pee lady!) and a co-worker is going to buy a big HDD so we can clone hers onto that one. SSIIIGGGHHH. Might put in overtime today, but I don't want to deal with this longer than I have to, so we'll see.

[namelesswonder]

Ramblings, Ravings and Rants.: TGIF, or how I learned to distract myself at work

Forgot Jenn's link, may add it in later. For now, somewhat busy (actually a lull right now, getting kind of anxious with nothing to do!).

[namelesswonder]

BoYFRIEND IS EMPLOYED!!!!!!!!!!!

Cook in a Bertucci's kitchen! He starts training tomorrow!

We are going to Wild Willy's to celebrate tonight! HOW MANY MORE EXCLAMATION POINTS CAN I USE?!

[Kakes]

HUZZAAAAAAAAHHHH!!! Much celebration is in order! So happy for you guys!

[honeybuns]

OMG!! That is absolutely fantastic news!!

Whew. One source of stress gone!

[cori93437]

BoYFRIEND IS EMPLOYED!!!!!!!!!!!

Cook in a Bertucci's kitchen! He starts training tomorrow!

We are going to Wild Willy's to celebrate tonight! HOW MANY MORE EXCLAMATION POINTS CAN I USE?!

Jobs! And yummy foods1! And there was MUCH rejoicing!!!

[namelesswonder]

Hehe great clip, Cori. Thanks for the well wishes. Off for the weekend!

[namelesswonder]

Heyyooooo

Lessee. Friday PM, we went out for hibachi grill with a friend. I ordered from the sushi bar. Not enough food, but I managed. Saturday, Boyfriend had his first day of training, which ended up being a double-shift so he was gone all day. I went swimming at my parents' house, went grocery shopping with my mom, ate dinner there, watched the pilot of Star Trek: Next Generation, then headed home to make something for Boyfriend. He said, "I'm tired, sore, and really looking forward to going back tomorrow." PERFECT. So as not to compete with light and noise while he played a game before bed, I watched a funny documentary about Conan O'Brien. Sunday, we went out and picked up some jeans and black t-shirts for Boyfriend to wear to work, gasped at the price of black shoes with good oil and slip resistant soles, and then I headed to my parents' house again. I helped draft a DIY project (building an L-shaped desk in my mom's office, used to be my brother's bedroom, very small space, but perfect for a home office) with my dad. We were too tired to go to Home Depot, then my godfather showed up so I stuck around and chatted. Stayed for dinner, good conversation, and got to keep the leftovers for lunch today. It was a really nice time (might blog about it, but kind of tired of being insightful on the blog right now). I picked up some dark chocolate & sea salt covered almonds at Trader Joe's (they have a cheap bag of almond meal there btw, totally picking some up when I find a good dessert recipe) to share. They are like crack. I could feel a stomachache coming on and had to cover them so I would stop eating.

Today, I got up early to deal with the evil evil computer at work (what I left over the weekend apparently DIDN'T WORK ARRGGHH). Skipped breakfast, still not that hungry. Should fill up my water bottle while I baby-sit a CHKDSK on evil computer before I try cloning the HDD again. Leftovers for lunch. I get to leave early today, due to early arrival, unless I'm still working on this beast of a machine, since I got in at 8AM. I did not get enough sleep. Something needs to change about our configuration/schedule if Boyfriend is going to be playing games after ~9:30 pm in the only air-conditioned room. I am not buying another air conditioner, so either it gets put in the main bedroom, we swap beds (his bed is pillow-topped and it reflects body heat, mine is awesome cheap IKEA memory foam) or room arrangements, or I need a window fan or something so I can sleep on hot nights. Last night, I was almost (or maybe I did fall) asleep and then Boyfriend called out to me to see if I wanted to sleep in the AC, since he was done with his game. I stumbled over and bitched about the sheets and passed out. I'm not nice when I'm woken.

I am REALLY looking forward to my mid-week day off (on the 4th). It'll be nice to break up the week a bit and rejuvenate. I think Boyfriend has to work, so I'll probably end up chilling at my parents' house again. I'll be back this weekend to finish my side-table project (needs polyurethane) and probably start constructing the L-shaped desk for my mom with my dad. This Sunday is Boyfriend's youngest nephew's 1st birthday party. Pretty sure it's gonna be a BBQ kind of thing, so there should be meat that's fairly safe for me to eat, anyway.

OH OH OH AND one of the highlights of chatting with my folks and godfather last night: my dad said he actually is interested in the Paleo diet and has been doing some reading about it. And I was informed that good quality lard is actually better for you than butter. And my grandma (my mom's mom, that I haven't seen in about 10 yrs because she lives in IL) thought it was really cool that I cook/eat so old-school. She still keeps a jar of bacon grease in her fridge and uses it regularly

[canio6]

Part of it is because I can afford to go while Boyfriend cannot, and he potentially needs it more than I do. I'm used to "dealing" (not really dealing, but surviving) with tons of mental stress, but this experience of anxiety and depression is pretty new to him.

With suicide rates being what they are with veterans right now I would be very, very surprised if boyfriend could not get free counseling through the VA. If he is not rated for mental health issues, he needs to make an appointment and get evaluated. It would get him the help he needs and might kick more cash his way. If he is already rated for them, he should have care through the VA already.

[namelesswonder]

Maybe his #1 issue is getting over himself. He hates dealing with the VA, but really the only thing stopping him from seeking help is himself. We'll see how things change as he starts working more, since he's only worked 2 days at the jorb so far. I think he would need to get evaluated, don't think there would have been any reason for him to be rated for mental health care when he was still in.