Ramblings, Ravings and Rants.: A random Monday
I don't have any inspiration for longer/more brain-powered posts like I've been doing the past few weeks. When I'm not feeling like blogging, I still want to try and get something up there at least twice a week. I think it will be a good writing exercise for me, much as this journal has been.
My Sunday shaped up after a while. I dragged my whiny ass out of the house to get some butter, potatoes, and a lemon (for my hair).
Food: I would say that weekends are becoming difficult for me again, but that's not true. I'm not giving in to pizza and easy crap foods anymore, but typical desserts are still a lure. We splurged on some Coldstone ice cream on Saturday night and got a container of banana ice cream with chocolate chips and Heath bar. SO GOOD. I still wish I'd gotten the chocolate shavings instead, but my anxiety was ramped up while in the store and I did not feel comfortable speaking up. I also had more than a few cookies (Boyfriend made sugar drop cookies, BEST COOKIES YET) on Saturday and Sunday. I told him I'm not allowed to have any more, the ice cream is gone, and I shouldn't need to go to the store until next weekend so I'm clean until then. L-Glutamine does help with the sugar cravings, but I think I am actually seeking fat (according to the ice cream).
Exercise: Did some bent-over rows, I'm up to 15 on each side. Why is my left side now stronger than my right? I always start with the left and make sure to do the same # on each side. Maybe I need that adjustment more than I think I do (just my luck, I finally call for an appointment and they're closed today). I had boyfriend do them with my 15# kettlebell too, he could do 50 on each side. I'm almost ready for my progress shots, I think. I don't mind that I'm not exactly where I want to be, fitness-wise, because it's a PROGRESS photo. Feeling a little silly about taking them now, there's really no point except to get some flattery. I need to fix my bikini bottoms first. I really want to move on to a 20# KB, but there are some moves I still can't do very well with the 15# so with that and budget in mind, I'll wait and keep working with what I have.
Budget: Boyfriend made the final call and we're not going to the concert at the end of the month. I'm a little bummed, but also relieved to hold onto that $40, especially after I spent more than I meant to on the hair supplies. I won't be buying anymore this month so it works out okay. I should also be getting reimbursed for some of my therapy co-pays soon enough for my FSA (so really I've already paid for it from the pre-tax money coming out of my paycheck, but I never see it so it's like a reimbursement to me). So I think this month is off to a good start, but it's early yet!
I spoke with Boyfriend briefly about my worries about our financial situation and made it clear that I need him to keep me in the loop because I am affected by this (his lack of employment, his job seeking efforts, ultimately who pays for what and what we can afford) too. He just said, "Okay", but seemed receptive and later apologized for something totally random that I haven't thought about in a while. I think I got through to him. Feeling a lot better, for now, about all that.
I think I might send my dad another email and summarize my stress over the last few months. I did not have the energy or strength to go to my parents house for a chat this weekend and I feel like it's just never going to happen if I don't keep talking (via email). I really need another outlet. I could talk to him on a weeknight, but I prefer lazing about =P