I had a bowl of greek yogurt with raw local honey (now condensed to RLH because I'm cool like that) last night. Aw fuck, that's right, Boyfriend made more cookies from scratch and they were even better than the first batch and I had one. My chin-acne is lingering because of these slips and because I'm having a hard time figuring out my candida combat strategies. L-Glutamine works fairly well on its own when I take it twice a day, but my bowel function is not quite right without probiotics. It seems counterproductive to take them at the same time, so I'm trying to do one in the morning and one in the evening, but keep forgetting. I just hope that once I get that down, my gut will heal enough that I can stop all these supplements!
I cried for a while on my own last night. I just feel really lonely. I didn't want to think so I just sat there in the dark until I felt like I could get up and do something. I tidied a couple things up and then asked Boyfriend if he could cuddle with me. I could not cool off last night so while he ended up falling asleep (and waking up with me this morning), I had to go sleep in the other room so I wasn't curling up in what felt like a pool of sweat. Urgh.
This morning, I admitted to Boyfriend about crying last night and how I was feeling. I told him I did not want to burden him with my feelings because he is feeling the same way and it doesn't help him any to hear it from me. I don't think he knew what to say (normally he'd say soothing things and hold me tight) so he just held me quietly. I keep thinking to myself, "I am at my wit's end," but I don't know what with, or what to do.
My steak is defrosting in the fridge, but not marinading in anything. I hope it will be okay with just some dry rub (it's some kind of london broil cut). I have some red potatoes and I'm not sure what to do with them, but I think I want them with the steak tonight. Mashed potatoes are too much work, maybe I can just cube them and bake.