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Thread: A thread wherein guys rant, complain, and chat about MANLY MAN THINGS page 158

  1. #1571
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    Quote Originally Posted by Saoirse View Post
    many of the comments on the blog piss me off, but that has nothing to do with my marital status.

    honestly, when my husband is commanding like that, i feel like he *expects* me to submissively follow along, which makes me feel unsexy and downright angry. that's why i say that this advice might backfire on some, because not every woman subconsciously prefers to submit.
    I would say that most of the advice will backfire in the real world. "Alpha males" are generally terribly insecure so they need a woman to submit to build up their ego. The problem is that this kind of ego building doesn't really work. Everyone, men and women alike, needs to build confidence from within, through their own achievements. Beating someone down isn't an achievement, it's just abusive. (Goes for both men and women) And more often than not, the man who has a submissive wife is the same one that down the line gets "bored" with his wife because she stopped having ideas and opinions. Or he dumps her for getting old because he never saw her as more than a maid that he could fuck. Think "mail order bride".

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    Quote Originally Posted by kenn View Post
    Are you serious?

  3. #1573
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    Quote Originally Posted by Saoirse View Post
    i think the gist of it is to be assertive and confident. don't be surprised if some of that advice backfires on you. some of us women really aren't into being told what to do, even if "experts" say we are biologically predisposed to want direction and commands. but then again, some of us women aren't into head games and don't want to be in a relationship with people who play around like that. another way to look at it is to decide what YOU are going to do (whether that's where you're eating, how you're spending your afternoon, or what mood you want to have), and ask her if she'd like to join you. honestly, self-help books have been recommending this for decades. you can only control yourself, and followers will follow if you lead confidently.

    for example, BS like this: "Women want men to rule them, protect them, guide them, tell them what to do… it’s just the natural order." Pfft... right... men like to think this (and maybe it works for some women), but that attitude would not get my husband anywhere with me. at the same time, the author talks about groups of women trash-talkinging their husbands, and i agree with his advice there. if my husband was in a group of men trash-talking their wives, I would never stand for it. why on earth is it okay for women to do this to their husbands? i've actually stood up against my friends before because they were verbally denigrating their husbands.
    Exactly. My marriage is an equal partnership. I don't want to be told what to do any more than my husband does. I don't believe in man-bashing, either.

    I think it's hilarious that men are blaming Oprah for this. I have never once seen a man-bashing episode of Oprah, and I've been watching for a lot of years. In fact, not long ago she had an episode dedicated to men who had been sexually abused as children. That's the anti-man-bashing.
    ~Sandy


  4. #1574
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blackcatbone View Post
    I would say that most of the advice will backfire in the real world. "Alpha males" are generally terribly insecure so they need a woman to submit to build up their ego.
    You don't know what you're talking about. You are confusing angry and frustrated "betas" or "gammas" with alphas. You are mistakenly equating alpha male behavior with misogyny because confident, independent men who don't "need" women are as threatening to you as abusive men.
    You lousy kids! Get off my savannah!

  5. #1575
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rosegin View Post
    In fact, not long ago she had an episode dedicated to men who had been sexually abused as children. That's the anti-man-bashing.
    Then she had an episode dedicated to men with severely damaged masculinity. When was the last time she had an episode that praised, for example, an entrepreneurial single man who follows his dreams and dedicates his life to improving his skills?
    You lousy kids! Get off my savannah!

  6. #1576
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    Quote Originally Posted by Grumpy Caveman View Post
    You don't know what you're talking about. You are confusing angry and frustrated "betas" or "gammas" with alphas. You are mistakenly equating alpha male behavior with misogyny because confident, independent men who don't "need" women are as threatening to you as abusive men.
    Well, if the content of the links supplied are any indication (hence the " "), then the so-called "alpha male" is indeed quite the misnomer. I'm actually not at all threatened by independent men who don't need women. In much the same way that they aren't threatened by independent women who don't need them. Independent men and women are in relationships because they want to be there, not because they have to be. But once you start talking about "gaming" relationships, asserting dominance and using head games to get what you want then you give yourself up as insecure. (Not meaning you specifically.)

  7. #1577
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    Quote Originally Posted by Grumpy Caveman View Post
    Then she had an episode dedicated to men with severely damaged masculinity. When was the last time she had an episode that praised, for example, an entrepreneurial single man who follows his dreams and dedicates his life to improving his skills?
    The episode was meant to bring to attention the fact that 1 in 5 men have been sexually abused. They are damaged because of THAT. It was meant to give those men a voice where they didn't previously have one. It was obviously empowering to those men. But Oprah is a show for women, and it more often focuses on issues that are important to women. This season is her last, and so many of the episodes are follow-ups to older stories.

    There is a lot of misogyny in this thread. I have to admit, that surprises me. It IS possible to be happily married, even if you're a man. I never expected "primal" living would promote sexism. The only women who want to be ruled by a man are those who are brainwashed, either by society or religion.

    I would think it would be a happier life to rid oneself of all the bitterness and anger that is being represented on the blogs that have been posted here.
    ~Sandy


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    This thread took a turn for the worse. Neither side is right, and both girls and guys can pee their names in the snow. Anyone remember Frank C.J. Mackey?



    NSFW _ Rated R

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  10. #1580
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rosegin View Post
    There is a lot of misogyny in this thread. I have to admit, that surprises me. It IS possible to be happily married, even if you're a man. I never expected "primal" living would promote sexism. The only women who want to be ruled by a man are those who are brainwashed, either by society or religion.

    I would think it would be a happier life to rid oneself of all the bitterness and anger that is being represented on the blogs that have been posted here.
    This is an excellent write-up of the Nice Guy® syndrome that so often leads to the "Alpha male" syndrome. Shakesville: Explainer: What is a "Nice Guy®?"

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