Ha! Here we go....
It's kinda aggravating because it's not like you see on "Swamp People" or whatever that show is called where those coonasses kill the shit outta gators. SC law requires you to attach a line to the gator before you can shoot it....dead gators sink, btw.
Gator arrows have a barbed head on them that detaches from the arrow shaft, or in this case 'shockazulu', and stays in the gator. A line is attached to the point with a float on the end. About the only place you can get it to stick in is a small pocket in front of the shoulder and behind the jaw. Once it's in you use the attached line to ease the gator, who may or may not be a great mood at this point, up to the side of the boat where you then put a round from pistol in his little walnut sized brain, tape his mouth shut, drag him over into the boat, sever the spinal chord with a knife, attach a tag to his tail then proceed home where you clean and eat his ass
......when you are shopping for coconut water and get irate when you find some only to read the label and see "sugar" listed as an ingredient.
......when you go running through the local grocery store with your buggy not caring how many people you run over, just so you can get to the "Asian food" isle, praying another Grok friend hasn't bought all the coconut milk.
I'm a paleo foodie, come check out my recipes: http://strangekitty.ca/
.......when you are out eating at the local mexican restaurant with your family and/or friends and guiltlessly order the guacamole dip and eat it without the chips and with a spoon as the people around you look at you like you have lost your marbles hehehehe.
.......when a Georgia girl prefers water over sweet tea and the thought of a biscuit makes her feel sick to her stomach.
.......when you are more excited about Tabita sprints than checking your family and friends FB status updates.
.......when you can't live without Mark's Daily Apple and it's the first and last forum you check every day.
.......when you are dropping the kids off at family's for a week and you have a 2 page printed list of foods NOT allowed and have to explain that peanuts are NOT a nut and that corn is NOT a vegetable.
.......when you pick up the box of 5 dozen eggs at Walmart and have a sinking feeling it's probably just not going to be enough to get you through the week.
.......when you see only 7 packs of bacon in the freezer and know you probably need at least 5 more just to be safe.
.......when cauliflower is the new "rice".
When you take the wrapper from the just used butter and wipe the remnants all over your hands as hand cream.
Yes, I've done that twice now without even thinking about it.
"You can always do more than you think you can !" Sensei Scash
When you wonder why the hell your coworker feels the need for 3 meals a day when two meals is WAYYY too much food.
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
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