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Thread: Interesting mental process. Just rambling page

  1. #1
    runnergal's Avatar
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    Interesting mental process. Just rambling

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    I workout with/train a friend of mine. She started working out a few years ago (for the first time in her life) with a friend who gave her a basic workout and of course she got good results, but then 2 years later she was doing the same workouts, the same weights...never progressing. She has a mental block about "I dont know what I am doing" and "I am not strong". She has no confidence in her abilities.

    If someone else doesnt show up and tell her what to do she either does nothing or randomly does some old exercises at the same weight she did the first day she picked up weights. Only occasionally will she push herself.

    It's just odd to me. I've never seen someone mentally hold themselves back as much as she does for as long as she has been at it. A lot of time I try not to let her see the weight I am giving her because if she knows it is heavier than before she cant lift it. If she doesnt she can.

    We are currently doing the same assist level on the gravitron for pullups. I weigh probably 15 lbs more so I am getting a little more, but not a lot more (and I struggle to complete the set more) but she sees herself as SO MUCH WEAKER.

    If a hard workout is hard...she thinks she is still so out of shape. She still hasnt gotten that the workout remains hard because we DO MORE. And that is is hard for me too. Because it is supposed to be. When she started she could barely do 5 waist high incline pushups and now she is doing 25 knee high incline and she doesnt see that she is stronger.

    And the one that boggles me the most in training. If I tell her "do X to failure" she will do maybe 8 or 10 and then stop basically at the point where easy stops and the work begins. If I tell her do 20 she will do 20 and fight for the last several. She'll push through injury without telling me it hurts if I tell her to do 20.

    It's just so interesting...and foreign to me. (and it does represent a lot how she lives her life) She's smart. Strong. but with a big mental block that doesnt let her see herself that way.
    MTA: because it is rare I dont have more to say

    "When I got too tired to run anymore I just pretended I wasnt tired and kept running anyway" - my daughter Age 7

  2. #2
    free3337's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by runnergal View Post
    She's smart. Strong. but with a big mental block that doesnt let her see herself that way.
    At some point in her past, this attitude/methodology was a useful and prudent process for coping with her reality of that time. Then eventually her environment changed, but the mental processes did not.

    it always comes back to a person's past...

  3. #3
    lizch's Avatar
    lizch is offline Senior Member
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    Maybe she's hooked on hearing people tell her that she IS strong? I have friends like that, who are constantly saying they are fat when they aren't, or have bad skin when they don't. I finally get to the point where I don't give the obvious platitudes back ("Oh no, you look GREAT!") because I think it just feeds it.
    Liz.

    Zone diet on and off for several years....worked, but too much focus on exact meal composition
    Primal since July 2010...skinniest I've ever been and the least stressed about food

  4. #4
    runnergal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lizch View Post
    Maybe she's hooked on hearing people tell her that she IS strong? I have friends like that, who are constantly saying they are fat when they aren't, or have bad skin when they don't. I finally get to the point where I don't give the obvious platitudes back ("Oh no, you look GREAT!") because I think it just feeds it.
    No...definitely not that. The awe at herself when I tell her what weight she used is genuine - you can see it. free is on the money. She was raised to be a helpless southern belle.
    MTA: because it is rare I dont have more to say

    "When I got too tired to run anymore I just pretended I wasnt tired and kept running anyway" - my daughter Age 7

  5. #5
    runnergal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lizch View Post
    Maybe she's hooked on hearing people tell her that she IS strong? I have friends like that, who are constantly saying they are fat when they aren't, or have bad skin when they don't. I finally get to the point where I don't give the obvious platitudes back ("Oh no, you look GREAT!") because I think it just feeds it.
    No...definitely not that. The awe at herself when I tell her what weight she used is genuine - you can see it. free is on the money. She was raised to be a helpless southern belle.
    MTA: because it is rare I dont have more to say

    "When I got too tired to run anymore I just pretended I wasnt tired and kept running anyway" - my daughter Age 7

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