Denise's "better late than never" PB journal page 2

[jrherring]

Great realization!

Hold on to it!

I'd be cool w/200 lbs if it were solid muscle!

[denise]

ta pet!

I THINK I'm somewhere in the 140s (thats where I was last November when I last got on a scale - and I don't think I am bigger now) - still some wobbles though!

My husband is having the same issues - he seems smaller to me but his weight isn't going down at all - and he gets discouraged. Now, if I can just get him not to weight either we might get somewhere! Meanwhile I ask him if he would care if he was 230 and solid muscle and looking great. He says "of course not" but then worries that "this isn't working" when the scales don't move.

[denise]

Sleep Much better, I really WAS tired

Mood normal - content. Not up not down just nicely in the middle.

1st meal 13.45 White fish, salmon and prawns with leek and mushroom, sauteed in meat fat then simmered in stock. BIG portion of food - hungry!
"Snack 1" 16.40 teaspoon of coconut milk off the spoon - but its wasn't the "right taste" so I stopped. think i actually wanted dairy!
"Snack 2" 17.10 12 black olives. Better taste experience. Hunger abated til dinner!

2nd meal 19.00 5 small pork ribs and 2 small chicken thighs, rubbed with salt & pepper, oven roasted + steamed cabbage and sprouts mixed into fat in roasting pan

Lots of herbal tea - peppermint today mainly + water

Exercise
walking on treadmill 90' varying speed and incline (max 115% incline at 6kmh, max speed 7.4kmh on "way back down" to 3% incline
spinning bike (not a class). 30" (HR between 65% & 85% max)

still "protecting" my knee by not running.

Supplements - all usual + 50mg 5HTP (as I approach PMS I thought I'd try it out to see if it helps with the carb cravings and overall PMS blues, so taking it before bed tonight).

Day 19(33) of whole(44)


Got a slightly upset tum again - running to the loo. If this is a bug its a tenacious little bugger. Maybe its to do with increased fat? I do add it to meals - otherwise I wouldn't be getting enough (fish has little fat in it for example, so I added some).


Looking forwards to a nice restful night again!

[Jenny]

Lots of gals look great in that weight range, particularly if they exercise to any reasonable degree. That might be just what's natural and healthy for you.

So yeah, letting go of the conventional attitude of "all women must be 110 lbs" could be quite a relief. I guess I'm lucky I've never expected to be super-duper thin. I'm just not made for that. As my Russian coworker told me, "Woman built for pull plow!"

[geostump]

Great journal! I am not a journaler per se and I hate writing but I am making a go of it. I'm just not as organized as you are!

I do love your posts everywhere and you do give good insights! Keep them coming and feel free to stop by and say "hi".

[inquisitiveone]

Led here by your enormously helpful posts in the forum at large. It is hard not to focus on weight as an end point, especially for women, I think; it's a message that gets drilled in to us early and often. (I was a tomboy as a kid, and still internalized those messages somehow.) Having fewer cellulite dimples is great progress, no matter what the scale might say—congratulations!

[denise]

Great journal! I am not a journaler per se and I hate writing but I am making a go of it. I'm just not as organized as you are!

I do love your posts everywhere and you do give good insights! Keep them coming and feel free to stop by and say "hi".

oh, thank you! I love (and am mildly surprised) that people even bother to read it!! I LOVE writing - as you may notice from my ability to witter on ad nauseum - so journaling is a pleasure for me. I currently have a PB journal here, a food diary (real - carry it everywhere) and a diary that i began for whole30 to track my feelings (before I thought of a PB journal) - bit anal i know but writing has been therapy for me in the past and so I continue to do it.

Big "hi"!!!!!

[denise]

Led here by your enormously helpful posts in the forum at large. It is hard not to focus on weight as an end point, especially for women, I think; it's a message that gets drilled in to us early and often. (I was a tomboy as a kid, and still internalized those messages somehow.) Having fewer cellulite dimples is great progress, no matter what the scale might say—congratulations!

thank you - I am aiming for dimple free; smooth as a babys bum (ok one cute dimple allowed then)

glad the posts feel helpful - that is always always the intention!! (Though I do sometimes get - well - "misunderstood" and I have been painted as some kind of smug, "doesn't understand fat people" (oh that one made me smile), PB Nazi!

I wouldn't mind, but I've never been able to get jack boots that would fit around my calves!

[denise]

As my Russian coworker told me, "Woman built for pull plow!"

this made my husband laugh out loud!

[Jenny]

I love being strong. I'm not talking about the aesthetics of it... just knowing I will be buff and badass again makes me inordinately happy. Humans should be performance animals. And I will be in great shape to heft my kids around, play, do all sorts of fun stuff. Oh, and deliver beatdowns to bad guys as needed. Yep.

Hopefully I'll never really have to pull a plow though -- sounds difficult and boring!