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Thread: Sex, I figured it out page 26

  1. #251
    Enamel's Avatar
    Enamel is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by iniQuity View Post
    I think with-holding sex is a deal breaker with most guys after a while.
    I know I wouldn't care for that. I hate it when people treat sex as some sort of currency - e.g. if you marry me, you can have it, if you do such-and-such for me, you can have it, if you don't do so-and-so, you can't have it.
    I think it's just something you do with someone you love, or something you do for fun, not a commodity to trade with. (Unless that's your job...)

  2. #252
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    geostump is offline Senior Member
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    I "found" religion after 12 years of marriage. My husband was born again before we met and that never changed anything. I honestly think he was glad to just get some action lol.

  3. #253
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    Quote Originally Posted by New Renaissance View Post
    +10,000!! Could not have said it better myself.

  4. #254
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    Quote Originally Posted by Enamel View Post
    I know I wouldn't care for that. I hate it when people treat sex as some sort of currency - e.g. if you marry me, you can have it, if you do such-and-such for me, you can have it, if you don't do so-and-so, you can't have it.
    I think it's just something you do with someone you love, or something you do for fun, not a commodity to trade with. (Unless that's your job...)
    In her case it was more of "If I'm worth it to you, you will wait" and I always tried to explain to her how that could cause issues down the road, but she professes herself to this day as the best thing to ever happen to men in the bedroom (how she can tell this without having sex I'll never know) so she claims the man she marries will be fully satisfied. I told her "what if your husband is the problem, what if he totally sucks?" and her answer "if I love him, it will be good"

    It's also a religious thing for her, forgot to mention that.

  5. #255
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    Quote Originally Posted by iniQuity View Post
    In her case it was more of "If I'm worth it to you, you will wait" and I always tried to explain to her how that could cause issues down the road, but she professes herself to this day as the best thing to ever happen to men in the bedroom (how she can tell this without having sex I'll never know) so she claims the man she marries will be fully satisfied. I told her "what if your husband is the problem, what if he totally sucks?" and her answer "if I love him, it will be good"

    It's also a religious thing for her, forgot to mention that.
    Even if you love the person, it can still be horrible.

  6. #256
    iniQuity's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by geostump View Post
    Even if you love the person, it can still be horrible.
    She's stubborn, but if it means that much to her then so be it, I'm just glad I'm not trying to have sex with her haha

  7. #257
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    zoebird is online now Senior Member
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    i would say she may not know better. i mean, i don't know if i would know better. LOL that is, whether it is good or bad.

    end of the day, i only know if it is good or bad for me, not whether or not it's a matter of his skillz. could just be me. as i told grizz, i never know what works on a given day.

  8. #258
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    Quote Originally Posted by Grizz View Post
    AmberLee,
    Here we may have a perfect example of the problem that men have been complaining about for decades (if not forever):

    " Woman goes to bed with man, and her attitude is, "Here's my Pussy, YOU figure out what to do with it." Then they complain to their friends what a bum lay he was.

    You women must assume that we men simply don't know what it takes to get you off. Every woman is different, and what works well on one woman doesn't work at all on others. Some get off easily from oral, others don't. Some have G Spots, most don't. Some get off from intercourse, and most cannot. Some say that women are a mystery to men, and it is true.

    On a first date, a woman MUST tell her man what gets her off, as every woman has somewhat different buttons that need stroking. Each new man in your life must be trained to give you orgasms the way you like them. We cannot read minds and we don't understand hints. Learn to get yourself off from masturbation, then teach us men how to do that for you. If you ladies have trouble getting yourself off, then please visit this site:
    http://dodsonandross.com/

    So Amber, did you tell your date what you wanted when you got into bed with him? Or did you fall into the same old trap that most other women fall into, "Here is my pussy - YOU figure out what to do with it." Here's a hint: Hints do not work with men. You must be direct.

    Trust me, most if not all men will bend over backwards to give you whatever it takes to get you off . . . . if only you SPEAK UP. I suggest giving your "Bad Date" another chance, and this time train him to get you off FIRST before he sticks it in. You should do the same with every new date you go on.

    Show him this surprising diagram: It will help him.
    http://www.ed-sim.com/en/home#tabs-page-1

    I'll wager that he will follow your instructions to the letter to give you as many orgasms as you want before he gets his off. If he is not willing to follow your instructions, then I agree you should give up on him and find another BF.

    PS) Mrs Grizz does not respond to the "Deep Spot." That does not matter to her because she gets such wall shaking orgasms from proper clitoral stimulation.

    PSS) IMO, you ladies & dads should make it your goal to train your sons & daughters thorough & proper sex techniques. They will listen.

    PSSS) Spit or swallow? It would make no difference for me. I would rather not come in her mouth, as oral is just a warm up for me and for her.

    Best to all,
    Grizz
    sorry if this is bringing up the 'creepy' conversation lol (i disnt mean to start a spit or swallow discussion)

    i disagree Grizz. It is inappropriate and passion killing to lecture a new lover -- esp with diagrams!

    for example, I don't need him to tell me what to do - but I do know there are certain things I should touch -- and do other things, and I will be guided by his response. You would not suggest that he lectures me on stroke technique or -- other things -- but he expects me to not just kiss and lie there, that is a given

    my complaint is men that don't try. that are so focussed on themslves 'getting there' that they forget you are part of the equation. that is just selfish.

    and if he wasn't going to try -- diagrams and a lecture on how I want it isn't going to help. if he has the mentality that its all about him, that's it!

    Maybe after some time its worth experimenting and that is loads of fun. But for initial first romps, he should be aware of touching certain errogenous zones and 'listening' to the response just as much as I do with his zones.

  9. #259
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    Quote Originally Posted by Grok View Post
    That reminds me of that big puddle I found on my sheets the last time I let a woman in my bedroom.
    I nearly drowned my last boyfriend once. It was awesome. LMAO!!

  10. #260
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    But Grizz, the main problem w premature ejaculation is that there is no time to find out what a woman likes. Really, it is a huge problem.
    If a guy can last a while then a couple can have some real passion and fun.
    There are exercises a man can do to gain control. Mens Health has some good articles and, of course, if you google 'how to last longer in bed', some other sites will pop up.
    Relationships end because of this problem....divorces, even.
    If sex is good a woman will not become....oh, what's that word men keep throwing around? Frigid, is that it guys.
    Even perimenopause women will do whatever it takes to keep a good sexual relationship alive.

    And on the subject or oral sex; I agree that it is foreplay BUT a good kisser and just the right amount of nasty is all I need.

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