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Thread: Plateaued/stalled? or unnatural expectations? page

  1. #1
    PrimaLauren's Avatar
    PrimaLauren is offline Junior Member
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    Plateaued/stalled? or unnatural expectations?

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    Reading the forum, I notice a lot of people (especially us ladies) complaining of getting to a certain weight and stalling, or failing to even begin losing weight. And what I notice is that a lot of the time, if the person is actually following their plan faithfully (and the stall is not about obliviousness to the caloric or carb intake that is really going on), that they are actually at a very healthy weight... But perhaps not a fashionable weight.

    Fashions change over time and what is perfect and natural for my body might happily fit with the current phase, or I might not be so lucky. For example, when Sarah Barnhardt was coming up in Paris in the late 1800s, she was ridiculed and considered almost freakish for her thinness - but that thinness is now considered a requirement if you want to work in entertainment today. At that time, a busty and robust figure was considered most desirable, so women at that time who were naturally skinny must have been the ones suffering and obsessing about changing their bodies to fit the fashion.

    So my point is, perhaps it is not a stall or a plateau, perhaps it is the body saying: "now I am at a perfectly healthy weight. Now I am at a natural weight. This is what I weigh when I am fed optimally. This is where I am at my best." Perhaps he/she would actually have to compromise their health and eat poorly and suffer energetically to be slimmer and reach their 'ideal'. I know for myself that the times in my life that I saw that perfect number on the scale, I was not healthy - physically or emotionally/psychologically.

    Luckily, as someone mentioned in a post called "Feeling sexy?" (or something like that), this way of eating, for me, makes me feel so much better about myself, regardless of weight. I feel so much more connected to my body, so much more "in" my body. I feel healthy and strong and calm, and that makes me feel attractive and sexy - much more than I did when I saw that 'perfect' number on the scale but was weak, cranky, and terrified that tomorrow I might lose my claw-like grip on my will-power and inhale very morsel of food that crossed my path. I am at a healthy weight for my body-type; I am a medium height and build and I wear medium-to-small-sized clothes. My body is in proportion, and people regularly compliment my looks. So why do I feel I need to lose 15 lbs?

    I think what we all want is to feel happy, content, at peace with ourselves. If we have it in our minds that we will feel that way when, and only when, we look a certain way or reach a certain weight, we might miss out on the opportunity to cut to the good part and just feel happy, content, and at peace with ourselves right now.

    This it totally a pep talk for myself, by the way thanks for listening!
    ~ i've tried every diet there is, but have always felt best when i did my own version of low-carb, one that turns out to be very much like PB. no one i know eats like this so i'm very happy to have found this site and some like-minded folks.
    ~ i'm 5'6'' and my (re)start weight, as of february 1, 2011, was 149 lbs (size 6/8)
    ~ february 14th, i'm 145 and already feeling more comfortable in my clothes and skin!

  2. #2
    Hedonist's Avatar
    Hedonist is offline Senior Member
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    Happy to listen. It all makes sense to me.
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  3. #3
    Hilary's Avatar
    Hilary is online now Senior Member
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    Superbly well said

    I see this as a way to reach my natural weight, not some number I (or the compilers of government recommendations) plucked out of thin air and decided was the 'right' weight. And as such, it seems to work pretty well.

  4. #4
    denise's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PrimaLauren View Post
    Reading the forum, I notice a lot of people (especially us ladies) complaining of getting to a certain weight and stalling, or failing to even begin losing weight. And what I notice is that a lot of the time, if the person is actually following their plan faithfully (and the stall is not about obliviousness to the caloric or carb intake that is really going on), that they are actually at a very healthy weight... But perhaps not a fashionable weight.

    Fashions change over time and what is perfect and natural for my body might happily fit with the current phase, or I might not be so lucky. For example, when Sarah Barnhardt was coming up in Paris in the late 1800s, she was ridiculed and considered almost freakish for her thinness - but that thinness is now considered a requirement if you want to work in entertainment today. At that time, a busty and robust figure was considered most desirable, so women at that time who were naturally skinny must have been the ones suffering and obsessing about changing their bodies to fit the fashion.

    So my point is, perhaps it is not a stall or a plateau, perhaps it is the body saying: "now I am at a perfectly healthy weight. Now I am at a natural weight. This is what I weigh when I am fed optimally. This is where I am at my best." Perhaps he/she would actually have to compromise their health and eat poorly and suffer energetically to be slimmer and reach their 'ideal'. I know for myself that the times in my life that I saw that perfect number on the scale, I was not healthy - physically or emotionally/psychologically.

    Luckily, as someone mentioned in a post called "Feeling sexy?" (or something like that), this way of eating, for me, makes me feel so much better about myself, regardless of weight. I feel so much more connected to my body, so much more "in" my body. I feel healthy and strong and calm, and that makes me feel attractive and sexy - much more than I did when I saw that 'perfect' number on the scale but was weak, cranky, and terrified that tomorrow I might lose my claw-like grip on my will-power and inhale very morsel of food that crossed my path. I am at a healthy weight for my body-type; I am a medium height and build and I wear medium-to-small-sized clothes. My body is in proportion, and people regularly compliment my looks. So why do I feel I need to lose 15 lbs?

    I think what we all want is to feel happy, content, at peace with ourselves. If we have it in our minds that we will feel that way when, and only when, we look a certain way or reach a certain weight, we might miss out on the opportunity to cut to the good part and just feel happy, content, and at peace with ourselves right now.

    This it totally a pep talk for myself, by the way thanks for listening!
    You are so right - and from your weight at the bottom of your post you are indeed at a healthy weight. If you are also well muscled, you probably look fab and deserve every compliment!

    I know EXACTLY what you mean about getting on the scales, seeing the prefect "number" but hating how I felt, being afraid it would not last (it didn't, it couldn't, I was killing myself to be there). I even hated how I looked!! I knew I was too thin, but still 'saw" too fat!! Totally messed up!

    So I agree with your personal pep talk - I give it to myself! BUT I have not yet quite "let go" of my need to be smaller/lighter - whatever. I don't weigh myself any more - but I do have "small clothes" and really want to wear them again comfortably. But this time I also want healthy. Only time will tell if thats achievable - I'm NOT going to punish myself to get there any more. Maybe as I go along - only 3 months so far so still at the beginning of this journey - I will find I just "let go" of these desires and finally learn to live inside my own (hopefully firm, tight, well muscled) body?

  5. #5
    Horsewoman's Avatar
    Horsewoman is offline Senior Member
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    I wholeheartedly agree. I used to be 130lbs and still wanted to lose more. I then got ill and ballooned rapidly to 270lbs. Well I can tell you that changed my attitude to body shape and size. I wished so much I'd just enjoyed myself when I was younger and actually very attractive instead of hating my body at 140lbs when I was growing up.

    Having said that, I am now 238lbs and haven't lost anything apart from the initial water weight when I started primal. But maybe given time I will start to lose.
    Gluten intolerance and hypermobility syndrome http://www.cfids.org/pdf/joint-hypermobility-guide.pdf

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  6. #6
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    Thank you for this thread! I know exactly how you feel--why can we be feeling so great but STILL convince ourselves we need to keep losing to get to that ideal place? It drives me crazy because I tell myself constantly that even if I were to lose no more weight, it'd be fine...but then the next day I'm back to telling myself to eat fewer carbs and be more strict! How do we break the cycle?

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