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Thread: The Sandwich is Back, and He's Pretty Pissed Off. Primal 5 Minute Sandwich Time! page 38

  1. #371
    j3nn's Avatar
    j3nn is online now Senior Member
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    Primal Fuel
    Oh no! One of our hippie health marts, like a small Whole Foods, will order anything we want if they don't carry it. But at that point it's easier to just order online. I <3 Amazon!
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  2. #372
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rivvin View Post
    I know you are asking yourself why the sandwich is mad. He's such a nice guy who has done so much for all of us at some point in our lives, how could he be mad at us? If it wasn't for him, we'd never have survived grade school. If it wasn't for the sandwich, construction workers everywhere would die of starvation. How could something so magnificent turn against us? Well, you assholes replaced him with some shitty cabbage and lettuce and wrapped your crap up in a green shroud of misery and tastelessness that completely defies everything sandwich has tried to give us.

    How can we redeem ourselves? By making a goddamn sandwich, and here's how.



    The Bread
    It's the staff of life... you best respect or step off, bitch.

    Your Hardware:
    A square or round glass container roughly the size of bread with a flat bottom.

    Your Software:
    1/4th cup flax meal or almond meal (they are both delicious)
    2 tbsp fat (coconut oil or butter)
    1 tsp baking powder
    1 egg
    100% of your respect for the sandwich!

    Mix all of that together very well and then pour it in your container. Microwave it for 1 minute 20 seconds. Congratulations, you just made some bread. Now pop it out of the container and onto a plate and let it cool off and firm up a bit.

    Guess what retard, this isn't a deconstructed sandwich topped with foi gras foam and molecular gastronomy bullshit, so you are gonna need another piece of bread. Do what you just did again.

    Put something between the bread. I don't care what you put between there, but it's not a sandwich unless it has something meaty inside. I chose a grilled chicken breast, spinach, spicy mustard, and some onion. If you make this without meat I hope you die.



    "WAIT A SECOND RIVVIN!" I know, I hear can you yelling that in your head. You want to know how I have such delicious crispy chips sitting next to that beautiful beast of bread and breast (chicken, that is).

    Stupid Simple Chips
    It's all that and a bag of chips. The 90's called, they want their tagline back.

    Your Hardware:
    A Knife

    Your Software:
    Some Parmesan (a block of the good stuff, don't use pre-shredded kraft krap)

    Slice the Parmesan thin and put it on a plate. Microwave the slices for 1 minute. Give them a minute to harden. Chips are made.



    It is my fervent desire that you have learned to respect that which is known as the sandwich by my frivolous use of profanity and unnecessary verbiage. If you use some already prepared meat, this thing can be thrown together in 5 minutes or less. You can flavor the bread with spices, you can switch to almond meal if you want something different, and there are literally a million different sandwich combinations out there.


    Sincerely,
    Rivvin. The King of Bachelor Cooking.
    mother of God....my mind is blown...
    SW175ish GW140 CW157

    height 5'6"

    Official for real start date 1/10/12

  3. #373
    Sunnivara's Avatar
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    I was skeptical but gave it a try. I had mine still warm with melted butter. It actually did taste like a hearty slice whole wheat bread!
    My only concern is the amount of baking powder, which is basically corn starch (is that allowed??) and sodium. Two slices of this "bread" gives you 1,000mg of sodium. Yikes!

  4. #374
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    Chebe

    Wow.. this looks awesome. And they make a bunch of different dry mixes. Pizza crust! Cinnamon rolls! Really?

    This looks like dangerous ground for me right now. I've got a lot of weight to lose yet so I think I'll file this one for later.... and hopefully I won't forget about it! The flour thing is a little scary to me at this point in my primal progress because of the glucose infusion and the whole subject of bread does a mind-f#$k on me... I swear I smell baking bread just from looking at those pictures.


    Tapioca flour is one of the “safe starches.” That is, it’s a toxin-free, antinutrient-less, dense source of carbohydrate. I wouldn’t exactly compare it to coconut flour, which is extremely high in fiber, low in digestible carbs, and really soaks up the liquid in a recipe. Tapioca flour can be treated more like potato or rice starch. It’s a classic carby flour, albeit one without gluten and other noted toxins.

    For someone with good glucose control, tapioca is a decent source of carbs. If you’re looking to add carbohydrates, or your activity level warrants it, go ahead and try it out. Since tapioca comes from cassava, which is perhaps the most popular source of starch across the entire world, it’s not like it’s a dietary unknown. To venture into tapioca territory is to travel a well-beaten path. Just realize that anytime you turn something into flour, you massively increase the speed at which it breaks down into usable energy. High energy burners in need of a quick hit may find that to be a plus, while more sedentary individuals might react poorly to a quick infusion of glucose (especially if it’s not going to be utilized right away or sequestered into already swollen muscle glycogen stores). Your call based on your context.

    Read more: Dear Mark: Vitamin K2, Washing Eggs, Tapioca Flour, Short Term Grain Feeding, and a Raw-Fed Pack | Mark's Daily Apple
    "If we’re not supposed to eat animals, how come they’re made out of meat?" - Tom Snyder, talk show host

  5. #375
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    Quote Originally Posted by j3nn View Post
    If you eat tapioca starch + dairy + eggs, Chebe bread mix is pretty amazing. I made a double batch the other day:





    Grain-free Bread (gluten-free) | Jenn's Menu & Lifestyle Blog
    I have a friend who loves this stuff. I don't eat eggs or dairy - can you envision a way of making it that would be egg and dairy free? Probably a dumb question, but a girl can hope
    Using low lectin/nightshade free primal to control autoimmune arthritis. (And lost 50 lbs along the way )

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  6. #376
    j3nn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jammies View Post
    I have a friend who loves this stuff. I don't eat eggs or dairy - can you envision a way of making it that would be egg and dairy free? Probably a dumb question, but a girl can hope
    That's a good question. The dairy is in the form of dry milk in the Chebe mix, but the only other ingredients are tapioca, tapioca starch, and sea salt. So, if you use plain tapioca flour, maybe some arrowroot/baking powder combo, and almond or coconut milk or even plain water, you've got most of the recipe remade. The only problem is the egg replacement. You could go the chia seed gel route or invest in a bag of raw Irish moss (sea vegetable) and make a gel out of it. One pound will last most people a lifetime, or at least a year or 2, lol.

    Irish moss video tutorial:



    I bought a bag on Amazon, haven't used it yet, but want to make the gel out of it to use as a thickening agent.

    Tapioca flour is super gummy when combined with wet ingredients, so it's really a good grain-free flour to work with.
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  7. #377
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    One of the great things about bread is bread pudding.....it makes a GREAT breakfast! I haven't done it in a while, but I would cut up the "bread" into chunks and add a couple of tablespoons of heavy cream, a little vanilla, some cinnamon and an egg. (I sweeten with liquid stevia) I just can't remember how long it took in the microwave to get it to the right amount of fluffy and keep it from getting dry. Seems like I started with a minute and went from there - it's probably microwave dependent and it takes a while for the middle to cook, just like with the bread.

    As soon as it's out and ready to go, throw a lump of ghee or coconut oil on the top, let it melt and spread it. For those of you who aren't watching your carbs too strictly, honey or maple syrup would be awesome on it. I no longer do dairy and haven't for some time, but I may play with it at some point using full fat coconut milk - I'll probably just use the solidified fat from the top of the can after taking it out of the fridge.
    Last edited by GoJenGo; 04-12-2012 at 05:48 AM.
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  8. #378
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    For the single batch split into two raminkins is the nuke time still 80 sec? Are both nuked at the same time?

  9. #379
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    Quote Originally Posted by j3nn View Post
    That's a good question. The dairy is in the form of dry milk in the Chebe mix, but the only other ingredients are tapioca, tapioca starch, and sea salt. So, if you use plain tapioca flour, maybe some arrowroot/baking powder combo, and almond or coconut milk or even plain water, you've got most of the recipe remade. The only problem is the egg replacement. You could go the chia seed gel route or invest in a bag of raw Irish moss (sea vegetable) and make a gel out of it. One pound will last most people a lifetime, or at least a year or 2, lol.

    Irish moss video tutorial:



    I bought a bag on Amazon, haven't used it yet, but want to make the gel out of it to use as a thickening agent.

    Tapioca flour is super gummy when combined with wet ingredients, so it's really a good grain-free flour to work with.
    Really wana try this. friend does it

  10. #380
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    Props to Rivvin for such a simple, tasty and useful recipe that is low carb.

    I just made a loaf of this last night by using 6x the listed ingredients heated at 350 for a nice while in the oven and it came out unbelievably good for such a simple recipe. I ended up binging on the whole loaf with butter and avocado before I could use it on my scrambled eggs and smoked bacon hah.

    Just a little tip, baking soda and apple cider vinegar is a great primal alternative to baking powder and you don't have to use as much of it either for a successful loaf.

    Can anyone recommend other good low carb bread or dough related recipes or threads? Anyone have success with french toast using this recipe?

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