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  1. #851
    merryish's Avatar
    merryish is offline Senior Member
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    I'm still hugely overweight, but I totally get where you're coming from. I've lost almost 100 lbs, and have more than that still to go. But I've already had such fantastic feedback from the people around me that it's doing major things for my confidence.

    I'm used to huddling down into myself and just hoping nobody notices how unattractive I am (that's being kind; in my head it's "ugly"), wearing bland and boring tent-like clothing. I never bothered with my hair, and never, EVER wore makeup. I couldn't stand the thought of wearing makeup. One of my brothers (kids can be cruel) teased me when I was a kid about "putting lipstick on a pig" and I never, ever got over it.

    Only lately, I've been buying clothes that actually fit me, and look nice and well-cared for. I've been using a little gel in my hair to give the curls a little bounce. I've started experimenting with tinted moisturizer to even out my skin tone, and a little eye liner and mascara for work. And I've started buying shoes, omg, the shoes I have bought. =D It's sort of a revelation; in the past, I never thought beyond how long I could wear a pair of sneakers before they wore out. I wore honest-to-goodness heels to work today. And a necklace. And earrings!

    It feels a little crazy, to be honest. I always thought of myself before as kind of tomboyish, but it turns out I'm way girlier than I ever knew; I just never felt like it was okay to be girly before. And weirdly, I think only part of it is the weight loss; the other part is feeling in control of my weight. Before, even if I lost weight on a diet, the diet itself felt wrong, and I always felt like it was just luck. Now I can actually see my body react to my different choices, and none of the choices are really hard; they're just choices that I can make. I'm starting to understand that I was seriously out of control before, and it wasn't my fault -- it was what I was eating that was making me eat what I was eating, you know? So dieting felt like riding a bronco, complete with the inevitable crash at the end. Now I make choices without that horrible feeling of inevitable failure hanging over me. Instead, I know that I'll be able to reach my goal; I actually believe it.

    So now I walk around in this confident haze of happiness, and people stop me in the halls to compliment me on my weight loss or my hair cut or clothes, whatever - and it's really, really strange and awesome. Just a few days ago, I even started to feel confident about using an actual picture of myself as my avatar -- a year ago I would have died of shame before putting my face online.

    I'm starting to wonder what kind of arrogant monster of a woman I'll be when I DO get to my goal weight! =D

  2. #852
    Kochin's Avatar
    Kochin is offline Senior Member
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    DEFINITELY feel sexier. Dunno how or why, but I'm more confident, more energetic and happier with my figure than every before. (Vain too. Very vain. )

  3. #853
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    Graycat is offline Senior Member
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    Not to sound too vain or anything, but I do feel sexier since I lost my extra padding. I notice I get noticed more by a large part of the male population. I definitely get checked out by guys about the same age as my son. I find it kindof flattering, but creepy at the same time. I have sort of mixed feeling about all that. Okay, I'm no longer fat and I'm stronger and healthier but I'm still the same person on the inside. I guess that's how human nature is though.

  4. #854
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    magicmerl is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pebbles67 View Post
    Crofter Even though he has witnessed all the benefits of my losing 65 lbs he still thinks it is a fad. Probably because I have always struggled with an eating disorder and have often been on different "diets". In addition not been totally faithful to Primal over the last 2 years. He is starting to grumble about being fat and wanting to give up bread, but I have heard this before.
    Just get rid of all the bread in the house. You do the shopping, right? Don't buy any.

    (My kids go shopping with me and it used to be a little embarrassing that they would plead for me to buy a loaf of bread. But they have stopped asking).
    Disclaimer: I eat 'meat and vegetables' ala Primal, although I don't agree with the carb curve. I like Perfect Health Diet and WAPF Lactofermentation a lot.

    Griff's cholesterol primer
    5,000 Cal Fat <> 5,000 Cal Carbs
    Winterbike: What I eat every day is what other people eat to treat themselves.
    TQP: I find for me that nutrition is much more important than what I do in the gym.
    bloodorchid is always right

  5. #855
    Louisa655's Avatar
    Louisa655 is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by merryish View Post
    I'm still hugely overweight, but I totally get where you're coming from. I've lost almost 100 lbs, and have more than that still to go. But I've already had such fantastic feedback from the people around me that it's doing major things for my confidence.

    I'm used to huddling down into myself and just hoping nobody notices how unattractive I am (that's being kind; in my head it's "ugly"), wearing bland and boring tent-like clothing. I never bothered with my hair, and never, EVER wore makeup. I couldn't stand the thought of wearing makeup. One of my brothers (kids can be cruel) teased me when I was a kid about "putting lipstick on a pig" and I never, ever got over it.

    Only lately, I've been buying clothes that actually fit me, and look nice and well-cared for. I've been using a little gel in my hair to give the curls a little bounce. I've started experimenting with tinted moisturizer to even out my skin tone, and a little eye liner and mascara for work. And I've started buying shoes, omg, the shoes I have bought. =D It's sort of a revelation; in the past, I never thought beyond how long I could wear a pair of sneakers before they wore out. I wore honest-to-goodness heels to work today. And a necklace. And earrings!

    It feels a little crazy, to be honest. I always thought of myself before as kind of tomboyish, but it turns out I'm way girlier than I ever knew; I just never felt like it was okay to be girly before. And weirdly, I think only part of it is the weight loss; the other part is feeling in control of my weight. Before, even if I lost weight on a diet, the diet itself felt wrong, and I always felt like it was just luck. Now I can actually see my body react to my different choices, and none of the choices are really hard; they're just choices that I can make. I'm starting to understand that I was seriously out of control before, and it wasn't my fault -- it was what I was eating that was making me eat what I was eating, you know? So dieting felt like riding a bronco, complete with the inevitable crash at the end. Now I make choices without that horrible feeling of inevitable failure hanging over me. Instead, I know that I'll be able to reach my goal; I actually believe it.

    So now I walk around in this confident haze of happiness, and people stop me in the halls to compliment me on my weight loss or my hair cut or clothes, whatever - and it's really, really strange and awesome. Just a few days ago, I even started to feel confident about using an actual picture of myself as my avatar -- a year ago I would have died of shame before putting my face online.

    I'm starting to wonder what kind of arrogant monster of a woman I'll be when I DO get to my goal weight! =D
    Your posting made my day. I've never struggled with weight but I can totally get what you are saying (I have a daughter who is obese and still not ready to make changes). I think you have a stunning face and despite the fact we can't see below the neck, I just get the sense that you exude your new found confidence and that will inspire those around you. I think it's wonderful that you are wearing a necklace and earrings and a little mascara to bring out the natural beauty of your eyes. Your brother's comment was selfish and thoughtless -- but hey, kids are kids and every one of us at some time has thrown out a thoughtless comments. Some of the most beautiful and sexy women I know are slightly overweight, but they know how to dress, how to care for themselves and they demand nothing less than complete respect from their colleagues and friends. I wish you luck on the continuation of your goal -- I have no doubt that you will soon be pairing your shoes, lipstick and handbag to your fabulous, new, healthy body. Thank you for inspiring me today. I'm always amazed at the stamina and fortitude of great women and men on these forums. /Lu
    ----------------------------------------
    F, 48, 5'10"
    Start Date: 25-06-12 @ 161lbs
    Goal Reached: 30-09-12 @ 143lb. Now bouncing between 145lb - 149lb. I'd like less bounce and more consistency :-)

    Started Cross Fit 20.12.12 ---- Can't wait to submit my success story on the 1st anniversary of starting primal.

  6. #856
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    Quote Originally Posted by magicmerl View Post
    Just get rid of all the bread in the house. You do the shopping, right? Don't buy any.

    (My kids go shopping with me and it used to be a little embarrassing that they would plead for me to buy a loaf of bread. But they have stopped asking).
    Thanks, I get what you are saying, but that just won't fly in my home. I don't believe in forcing people into anything. We would fight, and then he would go buy it anyway.
    Primal since 9/24/2010
    "Our greatest foes, and whom we must chiefly combat, are within." Miguel de Cervantes

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    MFP username: MDAPebbles67

  7. #857
    magicmerl's Avatar
    magicmerl is offline Senior Member
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    Yeah, I agree that you don't want to try and be in a controlling situation with him. But if he's saying he wants to give up bread, I would leap at that as an opportunity to stop buying it.

    Is there a way you can ask him about it that wouldn't make him inclined to become more entrenched?

    Maybe you can go on a food discovery voyage together about finding replacements? (We found pizza and lasagne to be the two hardest things to give up)
    Disclaimer: I eat 'meat and vegetables' ala Primal, although I don't agree with the carb curve. I like Perfect Health Diet and WAPF Lactofermentation a lot.

    Griff's cholesterol primer
    5,000 Cal Fat <> 5,000 Cal Carbs
    Winterbike: What I eat every day is what other people eat to treat themselves.
    TQP: I find for me that nutrition is much more important than what I do in the gym.
    bloodorchid is always right

  8. #858
    Pebbles67's Avatar
    Pebbles67 is offline Senior Member
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    Merryish I agree. You have a lovely face. Keep it up. Primal made me more girlish too. I used to wear only pants and dark colors to school. Now it is skirts and dresses almost every day. I look everyone in the eye and smile. Men stare at me now and even say things like "Hello Doll". I answer with "Hello, How are you?" instead of mumbling shyly or wondering who the hell they are talking to. Thank You for sharing your story here.
    Primal since 9/24/2010
    "Our greatest foes, and whom we must chiefly combat, are within." Miguel de Cervantes

    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Weight Loss Tools
    MFP username: MDAPebbles67

  9. #859
    Pebbles67's Avatar
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    magicmerl I am looking into "nourishing traditions" for ways to make less poisonous bread as a transitional step for my husband and sons. My youngest has Aspergers syndrome. If I take away his pb&j for lunch or his pizza, he would not eat. They are all about taste and consistency when it comes to food. I have changed over chicken nuggets and cereal to gluten free options.
    Primal since 9/24/2010
    "Our greatest foes, and whom we must chiefly combat, are within." Miguel de Cervantes

    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Weight Loss Tools
    MFP username: MDAPebbles67

  10. #860
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    Quote Originally Posted by merryish View Post
    I'm still hugely overweight, but I totally get where you're coming from. I've lost almost 100 lbs, and have more than that still to go. But I've already had such fantastic feedback from the people around me that it's doing major things for my confidence.

    I'm used to huddling down into myself and just hoping nobody notices how unattractive I am (that's being kind; in my head it's "ugly"), wearing bland and boring tent-like clothing. I never bothered with my hair, and never, EVER wore makeup. I couldn't stand the thought of wearing makeup. One of my brothers (kids can be cruel) teased me when I was a kid about "putting lipstick on a pig" and I never, ever got over it.

    Only lately, I've been buying clothes that actually fit me, and look nice and well-cared for. I've been using a little gel in my hair to give the curls a little bounce. I've started experimenting with tinted moisturizer to even out my skin tone, and a little eye liner and mascara for work. And I've started buying shoes, omg, the shoes I have bought. =D It's sort of a revelation; in the past, I never thought beyond how long I could wear a pair of sneakers before they wore out. I wore honest-to-goodness heels to work today. And a necklace. And earrings!

    It feels a little crazy, to be honest. I always thought of myself before as kind of tomboyish, but it turns out I'm way girlier than I ever knew; I just never felt like it was okay to be girly before. And weirdly, I think only part of it is the weight loss; the other part is feeling in control of my weight. Before, even if I lost weight on a diet, the diet itself felt wrong, and I always felt like it was just luck. Now I can actually see my body react to my different choices, and none of the choices are really hard; they're just choices that I can make. I'm starting to understand that I was seriously out of control before, and it wasn't my fault -- it was what I was eating that was making me eat what I was eating, you know? So dieting felt like riding a bronco, complete with the inevitable crash at the end. Now I make choices without that horrible feeling of inevitable failure hanging over me. Instead, I know that I'll be able to reach my goal; I actually believe it.

    So now I walk around in this confident haze of happiness, and people stop me in the halls to compliment me on my weight loss or my hair cut or clothes, whatever - and it's really, really strange and awesome. Just a few days ago, I even started to feel confident about using an actual picture of myself as my avatar -- a year ago I would have died of shame before putting my face online.

    I'm starting to wonder what kind of arrogant monster of a woman I'll be when I DO get to my goal weight! =D
    You are amazing! I have been overweight since I was 5 (now 46) and I know how it feels to hide from the world, wearing ugly clothes, letting your hair and makeup go. And the taunts of kid brothers too But have changed yourself. That is something 95% of the world can never ever say that. If you ever get discouraged remember that. You have accomplished something most people don't even have enough sense to dream of.
    You know all those things you wanted to do: You should go do them.

    Age 48
    height 5'3
    SW 215 lbs
    CW 180 lbs (whole foods/primal eating)
    LW 172 lbs
    GW 125ish lbs

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