all this sex talk makes me a sad single grok. when's primal-harmony.com going online? :P
yes, primal-harmony !
more likely to work given numbers in the US but I'll play anyway!
I think that sex was the first area that we started acting primal without even realizing it. Maybe it sounds sexist, but I think most women want a big strong man to take charge of them in the bedroom. It may not be PC to say, but I think that is how we're wired. It wasn't easy for me, I'm not a "take charge" guy, and my wife is a high-powered type-A glass-ceiling-smashing career woman. I stay at home with the kids and do all the things that a traditional wife used to do. So to outside observers, it looks like she wears the pants in the family. And for a long time, she did, including in the bedroom.
However, once I started taking charge, it unleashed something in both of us that has just been incredible. At this point, i believe sex and orgasms are primarily psychological. She knows how much I love and respect her, but telling her that doesn't get her turned on. Looking at her with pure animal lust in my eyes gets her turned on. Blindfolding her and tying her up gets her turned on. And if you get your woman turned on enough, orgasm is inevitable.
I used to worry about technique, but I really don't think about it anymore. It seems clear to me that my wife prefers vaginal orgasms to clitoral ones, but that's relatively recent, so I think it has a lot to do with the change in our sex life. And another amazing thing is how much she's changed. She never really refused sex before, but she wasn't always super gung-ho either. Now she's initiating and she's also doing other things to attract me. Buying loads of lingerie, getting Brazilian waxes, getting weekly manicures...
It sounds like some of you are overthinking things a bit. I don't count calories because Grok didn't, and I don't worry about technique or anatomy either. I agree that more communication from women would help, but I don't really expect that to change, so I don't worry about that either. I have a simple rule for myself in bed. If I'm doing something to her and I'm not sure whether it's working for her, then it's NOT working for her. Why? Because when it IS working for her, it's rather obvious from her body language and other sounds she makes.
If not, please study this diagram.
The clit is just not what we thought it was. It is like an iceburg with only the tip showing.
Happy Sex to you,
Well, tonight I found out I am doing something right with my oldest daughter. I was taking her up to her church to meet with the group for camp this weekend and she was telling me about a sex ed class that they take in 6th grade. I told her that if she has any questions she wants answered that she can come to me. I told her I know that kids are more sexually active at an earlier age and I told her that if she does decide that she wants to have sex with someone that she can come to me and we'll discuss it and if she really truly wants to do that, we'll take her to get on the pill. I told her that I would her be safe than sorry and that you can't always rely on the guy to carry protection.
My journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread62655.html
I think most of the female fantasies about being "ravished" actually come from puritanical guilt about our sexuality. If I am being ravished, I can have sex and still be "a good girl". I'm just a helpless maiden, he made me do it. I think it's time we realized that "good girls" can and do want sex just as much as men. I'm so glad my parents never filled my growing mind with any of that junk. Once during college I tackled a member of the school football team and had my way with him right there on the couch. Once he got over being surprised, he wasn't objecting. And I still consider myself a good girl
Geostump Well Done!
Paleobird Does the "good girl" thing still apply when the ravishing fantasy includes multiple ravishers? Not saying I would ever do it, but I think about it sometimes. I'm a Baaad girl and I like it. lol