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Thread: The Bedrock Journal - ( Pebbles67) page 720

  1. #7191
    athomeontherange's Avatar
    athomeontherange is online now Senior Member
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    Primal Fuel
    Quote Originally Posted by Pebbles67 View Post
    Wt. 216.2. Yesterday, I ate whatever I wanted within the realm of low carb Primal. I lost another pound. I'm not sure why I am not binging over this except that it is not a bad hormonal time on top of a bad emotional time.

    Last night I talked to my friend, the forty yr old male who came to auditions on Thursday. He is going to take the chorus role, but he said that he felt it should have been us as the principles. We have decided to have fun together anyway. I also remembered something the Director said on the phone yesterday. He said the vote had been so close that it was heart breaking. This man has always wanted me for the lead and he still wants me as one of the back up singers. He knows that I am a dependable actress who is easy to work with. I will call him today and accept the role.

    Today we are going to a dress up 25th anniversary party. I feel very confident wearing a dress and can't wait to dance my feet off.
    this says A LOT

    Quote Originally Posted by demuralist View Post
    jealous, love to dance don't get the chance nearly often enough.

    If you can't have the lead, then I can't think of many things that would be more fun that sitting in the back of the room with a buddy giggling away during rehearsals.

    p.s. I lost weight the week that I decided to relax regarding food because I knew that I would be stressed taking the kids to college. Congrats on your loss.
    this this this

    Quote Originally Posted by Pebbles67 View Post
    Things that I am celebrating today...

    Wt. 216.2 again, after a party.

    This is my lowest back to school weight in my entire 20 yr career.

    I am a mere 6 lbs from my lowest primal weight.

    I made 1 week binge free even with all of the emotional upheaval.

    I went to a party yesterday without my husband and felt comfortable. I had zero social anxiety due to Aspergers. I was also able to teach my kids how to pretend to be an extrovert even if it isn't in your nature. Oh and I looked Hot!

    I put aside my hurt, called the Director and accepted the background role. He was very happy. The next hurdle will be Mon night, the first cast meeting.

    ***All of the above circles back to the truth that when I eat clean Primal, everything is easier even when I am facing stressful situations.
    <3 ALL of this girl!
    Karin


    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

    What am I doing? Depends on the day.

  2. #7192
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    WT. 217.5 UD Salt!

    The read through of the show took 2.5 hrs. It was torturous because I was tired. I got home at 10 and had to get up at 5. It was hard not to sing the songs that the back up singers aren't in. I memorized them all. The girl who was cast knows very few of them. Sigh. I sang well on the back up parts. The back up singers are officially in the show in 4 scenes, but the director wants to use us as much as possible. It will be fun...eventually. Just in case anyone is wondering, I kept a smile on my face the whole time acted like a lady and even joked with the Lead actress.

    Day 2 with students. Getting to know each other.

  3. #7193
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    Would it be helpful (or too painful) to offer assistance to the lead who is unfamiliar with the songs?
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  4. #7194
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    athomeontherange is online now Senior Member
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    way to be classy Paula, as we know you are.
    Karin


    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

    What am I doing? Depends on the day.

  5. #7195
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    We have a Musical Director to help teach her the songs. I just like to sing along when I know the song, but I had to severely restrain myself because I didn't want to make the other actress feel bad.

  6. #7196
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    I say do it anyway... maybe the director will decide you're a better fit since you already know the songs. But do it "absentmindedly" so it doesn't look intentional.
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)




  7. #7197
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pebbles67 View Post
    Things that I am celebrating today...

    Wt. 216.2 again, after a party.

    This is my lowest back to school weight in my entire 20 yr career.

    I am a mere 6 lbs from my lowest primal weight.

    I made 1 week binge free even with all of the emotional upheaval.

    I went to a party yesterday without my husband and felt comfortable. I had zero social anxiety due to Aspergers. I was also able to teach my kids how to pretend to be an extrovert even if it isn't in your nature. Oh and I looked Hot!

    I put aside my hurt, called the Director and accepted the background role. He was very happy. The next hurdle will be Mon night, the first cast meeting.

    ***All of the above circles back to the truth that when I eat clean Primal, everything is easier even when I am facing stressful situations.
    This is AWESOME!!!

  8. #7198
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    I've been playing around with some macros and supplements the last few weeks and have made some discoveries and decisions.

    I upped l-tyrosine and 5htp to 3000 and 300mg respectively. I took 1500 l-t in the morning with 200 5htp and other aminos. I took the second dose of aminos in the afternoon, but I was taking the last 100mg 5htp at about 9pm . I definitely felt better with the higher doses, but my sleep was suffering. As an experiment, I decided to take my meds and the second dose of 5htp no later than 6pm. Now I am sleeping well again. I was always afraid to take 5htp during the day due to the possible sleepiness, but it is fine.

    I've been attempting to do ADF again with clean low carb Primal. The thing is that I think my body is telling me to feed it. My DDs have been extremely hard. I have ended up overeating on the last three. Yesterday I ended up in a full blown binge. I felt exhausted and emotionally down yesterday afternoon. Today, post carb binge, my mood was elevated. I am temporarily dropping any kind of fasting. I am going to aim for 20% below my TDEE, 1900 cals. I will eat at least 100 grams of carb. I will aim to get 135 grams of protein or one g for each pound of LBM. The rest of my calories will come from fat, around 100 grams. I will track on MFP.

    I will do this "feed myself" experiment for 30 days starting tomorrow. Hopefully I will be able to binge less and keep emotions in a more stable place. I hate to think that there is no hope; that just because I am a middle aged, peri menopausal woman I have to keep suffering with the hormonal upheaval and binging. It may be absolutely true, but if I stop trying, I'll just end up back at 280lbs again.
    Last edited by Pebbles67; 09-11-2013 at 02:55 PM.

  9. #7199
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    I think this sounds like a good plan, Paula. Cheers from me!
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)




  10. #7200
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    I'm dropping the VLC thing too. I'm not even monitoring much anymore. I eat cashews and usually some small bit of veggie for dinner - usually potato or squash since it doesn't seem to cause the gastric issues. Low carb isn't helping me lose weight so why bother?

    I'm just holding my own until I can see the doc about the bio-identical hormones. I'm sitting steady at 185 for the past 2 weeks. UGH!
    Read post #2626
    my motivation

    Things I choose to let go:

    All grains - including rice
    Refined sugars
    Legumes - including peanut butter
    Nuts and nut butters
    Alcohol and soda
    Chocolate
    Acidic foods, such as pineapple and tomato
    Coffee and tea
    Eggs
    Curry
    White potato
    Dairy - including butter

    I'm choosing to do this......... I don't HAVE to.

    I'm doing this because I'm worth it - because I'm worthy - because I love myself.

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