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What am I doing? Depends on the day.
Weight 220.9 -2.2. Today is a DD. Losing the July bloat weight quickly. Last night I went to the gym for the first time in almost 2 weeks. It felt good to be there. I will go in for cardio kick this morning if I can get rid of this headache. The variety show rehearsals are really cutting into my normal gym schedule.
I will post the BIW wrap up lessons today. Pitfalls and Possibilities...
Woohoo, look at you go, Paula!!!
Man, you can drop that weight, mine absolutely will not do that. If it takes 2 days to put it on it take 2 weeks to take it off (at least), no matter what "kind" of weight it is..new weight, old weight, bloated weight, water weight, blah blah it is all weight that wants to take its sweet time coming off!
BIW Wrap Up I have decided to multiquote my lesson summaries into one or two long posts for reference. But first, I would like to Present the S.C.O.R.E. method graphic. The course was called Building Incredible Willpower. The course taught strategies for building will power in all areas of your life using the S.C.O.R.E. Method. There were 20 lessons in all, 3 pre lessons, 3 lessons for each letter of score and two wrap up lessons.
Start. Create. Optimize. Ready. Evaluate.
On the graphic one lesson is bolded. I took this one from the top of Lesson 16
Last edited by Pebbles67; 08-04-2013 at 05:31 AM.
BIW Lesson Summaries
Last edited by Pebbles67; 08-04-2013 at 05:37 AM.
Wrap Up Lesson #19 11 Common Mistakes People Often Make Abridged from Dean Dwyer's BIW course.
So you are now fully up to speed on the entire SCORE method and all its subtle intricacies. But I wanted to use BIG idea #19 to let you know that you are NOT done with this course.
You see, most programs would send you a congratulatory email or maybe even a certificate saying you have successfully completed the course, but you won’t be getting any of that here.
The truth is you are not done, YOU ARE ONLY JUST BEGINNING. Everything you have read and listened to up to this point entitles you to stand at the START line on this journey to building incredible willpower.
This has the potential to be one of the most exciting and productive journey’s you have ever gone on, but in order for that to happen, I need to steer you clear of the common pitfalls that most people make that prevent them from generating the results they desire.
Common pitfall #1: No action taken
I came across a recent study that suggested that 72.3% of people who sign up for an online program do not take any action. Some never commit to the program at all, while others commit to the material in some form, but do not end up taking any kind of action that will impact the quality of the life they lead.
First, people think that if they pay money for something they will automatically commit to it. Unfortunately, there is no correlation between buying something and using it. Just think of all the treadmills, stationary bikes and rowing machines that get purchased but never get used.
The second reason is because people truly believe they can defer difficult work until a later period of time and actually come back and do it.
Deferring action however is a ploy we use to trick ourselves into thinking we are really going to do something, when deep down we know we won’t.
Deferred action, with no plan attached, almost always leads to no action.
The work around with this course or any program you purchase is to use the first step in the SCORE method and decide in advance how and when you will commit to the course work based on the life you lead.
From there, completing a course follows the same principles that John Grisham uses to write his novels. You show up on the days and times you said you would and do the work.
Common pitfall #2: Mistaking reading for action
This is something I recognized in my own life. Reading is really deceptive because it gives the illusion of action, when in reality, it is learning.
Learning and action are not the same. Lots of people take “how to” courses and never do anything with the knowledge they possess.
Reading about the SCORE method and actually printing off the worksheet and working through a trouble spot in your life is something else entirely.
If I don’t point this out, less than 30% of the people who take this course will get beyond reading and listening of the lessons. Just make sure you are fully aware that reading and listening entitle you to be a spectator only. To get onto the playing field and be a participant you need to ACT!
Common pitfall #3: Material is only reviewed once
As you now know, there is little fluff in this program. Each lesson presents a multitude of ideas and potential options upon which to choose.
Consequently, going through it a single time makes it nearly impossible to grasp every concept that is presented.
In fact, the first time through can be so overwhelming that you will forget most of what you learn.
I have read some books 3 or 4 times and I am always amazed what I did not see the times previous.
Common pitfall #4: Overwhelmed with the sheer volume of ideas and possibilities
This is common in most areas of our life. It’s one reason I only subscribe to about five blogs at any one time. Otherwise, I am exposed too so many different competing ideas I get pulled in a million directions and I do nothing.
Much of what I suggested in pitfall #3 will help deal with overwhelm, but there are a few other strategies I have picked up along the way that may prove helpful to you.
First, set the pace for your own learning. Never be at the mercy of someone else’s schedule. Adopt at a pace that allows you to absorb information and NEVER apologize for that.
Just because a new lesson is delivered every Monday to Friday for example doesn’t mean you have to do a new lesson everyday.
The other thing I would suggest is to err on the side of doing less. My default is to go all in on things.
Common pitfall #5: Relying on memory
People will read the SCORE method and think that they will remember to use it when it matters most.
But let me ask you this. What did you have for lunch yesterday? Odds are you won’t remember or it will take you some time to figure it out.
That’s exactly what happens with some of the important things we think we are going to remember.
Memory should never be counted on EVER when it comes to creating behavior change. Leverage the wonders of technology to help you do those things you must.
Common pitfall #6: A lack of consistency
This is my own personal opinion, but I think this is the BIGGEST problem that people suffer from when it comes to successful behavior change.
People don’t stick with anything long enough to reap the rewards.
Amazing things happen when small changes are done consistently over an extended period of months, years and decades.
Common pitfall #7: Not seeing the bigger picture
Trying to figure out what works is really an exercise in failing our way to success. You are going to have to try a bunch of things until you can figure out exactly what works and what doesn’t.
But most people are not schooled in the fine art of failure. We have been taught to consider failure a bad thing. That’s why many people who attempt an extreme detox diet quit the moment they mess up.
But think about that for a moment. Lets say you are ten days into a thirty-day detox and on day eleven you mess up. What’s stopping you from starting again on day twelve? Even if you stumbled four other days, that’s still twenty-five perfect eating days out of the last 30.
Common pitfall #8: Stop doing the things that lead to success
You can’t adopt a new behavior, create change and then think you can stop and still reap the benefits.
WHEN YOU REMOVE THE CAUSE YOU REMOVE THE EFFECT.
That’s helpful when it comes to deciding what things you are going to adopt. Understand that if you adopt them you are signing up for the long haul.
Common pitfall #9: Not sustainable long term
I have already talked about why I am not a fan of extreme programs. They are not sustainable long term unless you have a serious support system in place.
Yes you can FORCE the body to get results short term, but if it is too much, the body will eventually fight back and say it has had enough.
Work on adopting smaller more manageable behaviors that are sustainable long term that fit into the context of the life you lead.
Common pitfall #10: Failure to recover
I learned on my journey that failure was not the problem. It was my inability to stop the bleeding that led to my eventual downfall.
Failure for most people mirrors that big oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico back in 2010. While news of the spill was tragic, the real issue was the fact they didn’t know how to cap it and stop the disaster that was.
That’s a great analogy of what it is like for most people. They have a spill, and rather than cap it to contain the damage they just let it spill out until it is a full-blown disaster.
The faster you contain your spill, the greater the odds that a full and immediate recovery is likely.
Common pitfall #11: Stop collecting data
I was definitely guilty of that one. Listen there are people out there who can intuitively navigate the important data in their life and thrive doing so.
I am not one of those people and you aren’t either.
Data is at the core of your success. The moment you stop weighing yourself, or logging your foods, or not autopsying a minor spill is the moment things begin to derail.
It is scientifically proven that we are horrible estimators.
DATA IS YOUR SAVIOR. When you make it a habit of collecting data daily, you are constantly aware of what is going on.
And as soon as you see things trending downward, you can immediately put a plan in place to get things back where they should be.
Last edited by Pebbles67; 08-03-2013 at 04:47 PM.
BIW Wrap Up Lesson#20 The Art of the Possible Abridged from Dean Dwyer's BIW course.
Wow! It is hard to believe this is the last BIG idea before I set you free so you can go forth confidently knowing you are armed with everything you need to slay many of your greatest demons that have long held you back from being the person you always knew you could be.
I would like to use this BIG idea to paint a picture of the possibilities that exist for your new invented future.
Possibility #1: Recapturing that trust in yourself
The one thing that has taken a beating over your years or decades of struggle is the lost faith in your ability to trust yourself in the critical moments of your life.
Every time you said you are going to do something and didn’t, you made a tiny withdrawal from your personal trust account.
You have made so many over the years that you are dangerously close to declaring bankruptcy.
What the SCORE method does is empower you to begin making micro-deposits of trust back into that account, by giving you a system that helps you honor the commitments you have made to yourself.
Possibility #2: Seeing the immense power of the system
The SCORE system works. The more you work it and get results the more you will come to trust it implicitly.
I have presented it in the context of building willpower, but it is a system for building incredible relationships, it is a system for building incredible happiness and it is a system for building incredible impact.
The more you work the system, the more you will discover how the system will work for you in all areas of your life.
Possibility #3: Being in control of your life
When problems get the better of you, you feel like you are powerless to do anything to change the circumstances you find yourself in.
But as you work the SCORE system, one of the unexpected benefits is that, for the first time in a very long time, you are going to feel you are actually in control of things.
Another little tip I have picked up along the way that will help you out as well, is to begin to train yourself to become mindful of the results you generate and how these connect to the notion of being in control.
Being in control of your life gives you the strength and the courage to begin daring more greatly as you look to venture forth and build the life you thought was never possible.
Possibility #4: Creating incredible self-awareness
I believe you live two lives; the one before self-awareness and the one after it.
And there is really no comparison. Your life before self-awareness was one of desperation. You jumped from one solution to the next hoping someone was going to be able to fix you.
The SCORE method opens your eyes to that world you have never seen before. It gives you the gift of awareness.
And awareness comes with it’s own inherent set of gifts–one being immediacy. You can immediately see the impact of the bad choices you make. This was something that may have taken months or years to happen in your old life, if it even happened at all.
But now you have the ability to make immediate course corrections so you can avoid impending disaster.
You now have the opportunity to live a life void of the devastating extremes that were so commonplace in your past.
Here is an example of how that now works in my life.
When I log my foods, the goal is to come in under 100g of carbs on all days except my weekly treat day.
Recently I had a day where I came in at 140g. I immediately decided to make a course correction by structuring the next day so I would only consume 60g of carbs.
And just like that I was back on track.
That is one of the greatest changes in my behavior now. Awareness allows me to make changes in real time and correct tiny bugs in the present rather than wait for months until those bugs morph into full-blown disasters.
Possibility #5: Increasing self-compassion
No one is harder on you during your struggles than you. You call yourself names. You label yourself with every character flaw you can find. And you talk to yourself in a way that you would never talk to someone else who was experiencing similar struggles.
I used to have this motto that I was quite proud of, which was, “No one is harder on me than me.”
I don’t see that as a badge of honor anymore. The point is not to be HARD on myself. The point is to be fair in my assessment of myself and treat me exactly as I would treat others in a similar situation.
The SCORE method opens up to a whole new way to see you. You begin to see you for who you ARE, not for whom you think should be.
The inference seems subtle, but the implication is seismic in its impact on how you will begin to treat yourself.
You begin to shift away from this idea that you are the “Biggest Loser” to something that reinforces the notion you are perfect as you are and with the right system in place, things will only get that much better.
The added bonus of self-compassion is that it increases your compassion for others.
Possibility #6: Increasing your confidence
Your confidence is the other thing that takes a beating pre-SCORE method. You have tried so many things and failed so many times that your armor is not just dented, it has been crushed like pop can.
The brilliance of the SCORE method is that it helps you rebuild that lost confidence one small success at a time.
I always shudder when I hear people say things like, “You have to believe in yourself” or “You have to have confidence in who you are.”
You don’t “have” confidence you build it. And it starts knowing you have a system in place that you trust. When you work that system, in this case the SCORE method, you begin to create the small wins that help rebuild and replace that mangled armor that was once representative of your confidence.
Possibility #7: Mastering consistency
As I have stated previously, I really believe if people just stuck to their bundle of sustainable solutions day in and day out rather than hopping from one quick fix solution to the next they would experience incredible success.
You have to remember that BIG problems are solved with small solutions. Those solutions don’t come wrapped in 4-digit price tag. They are cheap, easily accessible and extremely unsexy.
But when you bundle those unsexy solutions together in a pack of three, or five, or seven and you commit to them without fail on a daily basis over an extended period of time, amazing things start to happen.
Possibility #8: Continuing to manufacture courage
Using the scale scares the heck out of people because they are afraid to confront the truth about their situation.
They are also afraid because it “screams” at them when they are not doing things right or doing the right things consistently, by showing a number that is trending upward rather than down.
But a scale is just a device that weighs the things that are placed on it. It doesn’t offer judgment, or make snide comments or snicker at the number presented.
Any meaning attached to the number that appears comes from you. Avoiding the scale altogether is not the solution, just as not logging your foods on a day when you went bananas with your eating is not the solution either.
It’s about teaching yourself to stop running from the things that scare you. It’s about turning and facing them head on even if you get beat down severely in the beginning.
Getting on a scale and seeing that number can be horrifying at the beginning. But as you begin to address why that is and what it all means it becomes less so over time. And sooner than you might think, it actually becomes what it is supposed to be: objective feedback.
Does the number on the scale scare you? Take a stand and begin working through that issue to get at the real root of the problem and the solutions you can implement.
Does failure in general scare you? Take a stand so you can learn to see it for what it really is: feedback.
I could go on and one with my list, but you catch my drift here.
It’s time to stop running. You have a framework that allows you the ability to start manufacturing courage.
Possibility #9: Daring greatly
I want to end with an excerpt from Theodore Roosevelt’s speech, “Citizenship in a republic.”
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or whether the doer of deeds could have done better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes up short again and again.
Because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause;
Who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly…”
I want you to remind yourself that you are that great man or woman Roosevelt refers to.
By signing up for and completing this course, you have chosen to enter into the arena.
Don’t discount that. That’s a significant achievement.
And remember you are striving valiantly to change the circumstances that currently surround you and even though you are giving it your best effort you will continue to come up short again and again.
But there are two things worth noting.
First, you have a system in place now to deal with those situations when you do come up short.
And second, you are invested in a very worthy cause—You! And by having the courage to dare greatly you open up the possibility to experience success in ways you never dreamed were imaginable.
Last edited by Pebbles67; 08-03-2013 at 05:12 PM.
I wanted to post large chunks of the last 2 lessons because they are encouraging and applicable in many ways. Each lesson in the BIW course was 5-10 pages long. Definitely worth the fee for the course. I have a lot of reviewing to do.
Dean plans to do a BIW 2.0 at some point. That is why I have only summarized the main ideas of each lesson.