I have been feeling sick the past few days. Throat trouble with fluid build up in my ears. The cool Indian Doc I saw today said gargle with salt water and do nose breathing exercises. How very Zen of him. Sadly, I just wanted antibiotics. He thinks it is viral so drugs won't help.
I have decided to start cleaning up the food issues on Sunday. I have a summer party to attend tomorrow and have already blown today. That will give me one month to at least get back down to my low before going back to school.
Am I hopeful? Eh.
I have been thinking about my Why? for eating healthily. I have two.
1) I don't want to become ill with or die of a preventable disease. ( I already have some pretty scary illnesses.)
2) My kids will need me for a long time to come.
These are not new Whys?, they just need to become more powerful than what I am getting out of eating badly.
I'm wondering if you should also be looking at the WHY? do you binge --- then weight the benefits and the pitfalls between binging and eating healthfully.
I have been doing this with my poor eating choices..............example:
WHY do I want to eat ice cream?
BENEFITS: Because I love the coolness and creaminess. It feels good and tastes good in my mouth - and even as I'm swallowing. Its gives me a NOW satisfaction.
PITFALLS: It makes me feel bloated. It makes me feel nauseous. It interferes with my weight loss efforts. It goes against my desire to keep processed sugar out of my system.
WHY do I NOT want to eat ice cream?
BENEFITS: To avoid the bloat and nauseous feelings. To loss weight. To avoid putting processed sugars in my system.
PITFALLS: I miss out on the NOW satisfaction and I feel sorta cheated out of eating "treats".
So............ looking at it from both points of view -- its pretty obvious why I should choose NOT to eat ice cream. The benefits of NOT eating ice cream allow me to avoid the pitfalls of eating ice cream. Its a win win thing.
(this makes total sense in my feeble brain)
That being said.......... I totally understand that binging is not a matter of just saying "no I'm not going to do that" Its more than a choice --- but I would think examining the behavior from all sides would help to better understand it and control the urge - or avoid the urge all together.
I can make the same argument with RUM. (which by the way I am now 10 days without drinking!) I have some in the cupboard - but I choose the benefits of not having it - over the benefits of having it............. Sorry if this all sounds really stupid. It started out sounding really good in my head!
Last edited by tomi; 07-26-2013 at 05:12 PM.
Read post #2626
Tomi, I started working on the Why? For binging earlier this week. I' m not sure it will help to know why, but it is a step in some direction. I think my Why has a lot to do with control. This is mine! FU to whatever.
Have been analyzing the binges themselves. The food never tastes as good as I hope and constantly feeding the monster once she is loosed, is a pain. Thanks for the great thoughts.
Girl.. we have so much in common.. LOL
BIW Mod 5 Lesson 3 Manufacture Courage
- Observe. Embrace, Demand More. See your issue as an outsider would. Completely accept it and don't fight it. Be in the moment with it and ask for more of those feelings. (How this can be used is not yet clear to me.)
-Be transparent about your issue. Share it with others.
-Lean into your problem as a way to acceptance and change, but don't lean on it as an excuse.
A binge for me is definitely looking for something. So I eat, but since it is very rarely what I am looking for I continue eating trying to find it. Of course food is not the answer, but by the time I allow myself to see/feel that, I have cleared out the pantry (it is almost always a pantry raid).
For me I think I am usually looking for an easier solution to whatever is bothering me, well or a solution at all. I often have this totally irrational fear, because "I am not good enough", that if I say something to the hubs that he will leave me. I also tend to be a person who, at almost any cost, does not want to make others feel bad or upset.
Sorry, took over your journal for my own psychoanalysis...
P, I think you have the "Observe, Embrace" down I think you need to work on the "demand More" part. Demand, of yourself that you can go ahead and feel the emotion and know that it will be resolved sooner if you do. Demand, of the hubs that he grow up, (or whatever it will take to be the man you married). This is likely true for me as well!
You are pretty transparent with your issue and sharing, I think you have this down!
Maybe the 3rd has to do with saying "ok, I binge to handle feelings I don't want to deal with" now how do I substitute a more acceptable/useful behavior. (again the example is about me, but I think you can work out one of your own).
Holy Hangover! I drank and ate too much last night. Luckily I remembered my tylenol and vitamin Bs before passing out.
Laying floor in the basement today will be the exquisite torture I deserve. Lol
I weighed this morning and wrote it down...that is all. Eeeek!
Today I am back to ADF. I am doing a DD. 500 cals for dinner.
I will post the last BIW lesson for this week at lunch time. Next week is the final week. After that, I plan to reread the course as a whole and do a re cap. I'm sure I have missed a lot of essential stuff just because it started as 6 lessons a week. Participants asked for mercy, so the last two weeks are 4 lessons each. Phew!
Did you go to a party?