2 binges and one permissive eating day, but I'm right in the middle of it, so I can't tell how many more there will be. Yes, it is better and I could live with three binges a month, except that I will make no weightloss progress that way.
Here is the truth of the last two months so that you all understand why I downplay my January weight loss. I started EMF in early December at about 242. I was down to 235 on xmas eve. 8 Day holiday binge fest. Jan 1st 247.5 lbs. Got down to 233.
Jan. 12-15 binge, back up to 242. Clean until Feb 10. Got down to 228.8. Today 234.
It seems like a hopeless situation for weightloss, but at least I eat healthier most days of the month.
Paula, I believe you're one of the main champions of primal for health, not just weight. Even if you do or don't need to lose weight (not up for discussion, your decision), you're in it for the long haul. Get healthy, get your brain and mind healthy, then worry about your body. No one's perfect. If you were, we likely wouldn't be friends because I'd call you a sham. You've come so far in such a short time. That's amazing in and of itself. You've only JUST found your key. You gotta grease the lock before it works all the time every time.
"No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
My Primal Battle Tome
Beating yourself up over it, won't help at all (aaah if only I could take my own advice) people like us that deal with various forms of eating disorders, disordered eating, etc have a whole lot more to battle than just eating right and losing weight. A lot of it falls into a mental game as well.
Lets look at the positives:
You have decided to take on a healthier lifestyle
You've figured out how to eat healthy
You've figured out how to reduce your binge circles
You've gained quite a bit of self esteem and empowerment.
You still weigh less than from when you started.
(I'm sure you can add more)
It sounds to me like you are winning
And remember, you have to heal the inside before you can heal the outside
Thanks for all the cheerleading. I didn't mean to start something, again. (Geez, this journal must read like "Uh Oh!, Paula's is having a binge cycle again, Crap! Paula's husband is being an asshat again, Hurray! Paula is feeling sexy again and posting innappropriate shit...)
I am just beginning to accept that this is the way it is. Just accepting, Not trying to be negative and I will continue to fight the good fight.
NB, Thanks for the positives. Yes, things are certainly better than in 2010, but still not good enough for optimal health as I am facing a parental history of cancer, stroke/aneurysm, heart disease, diabetes etc plus my own clotting disorder.
Chris, 230 was my average wt for last year. High 248 Low 213.
We just love you and want to make sure you are bombarded by care & affection just in case you need it .
Journal on depression/anxiety
Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).
well, rats, nevermind