The Bedrock Journal - ( Pebbles67) page 408

[Saoirse]

"that's nice, honey, go fuck a pine cone."

oh lordy, I'm saving that one for later!!

*vomits on all your lovey-doveyness*

No, but seriously, you all are adorable.

indeed.

Geo, That is my fear. Even though he means well, there are things that once said can't be taken back.

FW, thanks for the male perspective. There are lots of things in his life that are making him resentful.

We had a talk tonight that did not go well. How could it? I am in that special time. Emotions are high and control low. He feels exasperated with our sons and feels like I don't support him. (And is overweight and feeling bad and doing nothing about it.)

The argument was about whether Billy would be allowed to attend one of the 4 year SUNY schools if he gets in. Husband said "No I don't want to waste the money." I said that we should give Billy the chance, and told him to stop being so negative. Which went over badly. He often sets an ultimatum and we have to follow it, but not this time. If Billy gets into a 4 yr school, He is going if he wants to.

Then I suggested that he might feel better about everything if he started taking care of himself....He said "You're the last person who should dictate to me" "You've been packing on the pounds lately." I said "So you are going to stay sick and unhappy because I haven't been successful?"

Well, you can imagine the rest.

My reaction to this type of marital strife has always been to eat, because F him the food is MINE.
God please help me not to eat. I want to show him that I can do this.

umm...wow. what a jerk. I know there are two sides to everything, but still. yay for weight reduction!!

[athomeontherange]

Hang in there with the kiddo and the hubby. Each day is new and fresh (so say I with a challenging dd). Yeah for the loss!! Lets hear it for fat!! wait.. you know what I mean!

You are still an outstanding teacher.. school politics and protocol can be aggravating.

[jenn26point2]

Hi Paula. Finally caught up with your journal. Everyone was busy and chatty this weekend! Wow.

Sorry to see all the negativity floating around DH recently. I can't remember - does he take medication for his anxiety?

I hope things brighten up with your son as graduation nears and college becomes a greater beacon in his life. I wanted to do community college at first too b/c I didn't know what I wanted to be when I grew up. After 2 years in college, I joined the army. During those 4 years, I changed my major 6 times. Did not graduate. During the 5th year, I did graduated from a community college with a law enforcement degree, with which I do absolutely nothing. Spent the next 4 years working for the Army, then finally went back to school, online, and got my bachelors in business. I still do nothing with my degree, but having it did land me this job. Now I'm almost done with my masters, but I have no experience to go with it, so I'm still not a marketable employee...

Moral of the story, DO NOT FORCE your son to go to school if he is not ready. If he doesn't know what he wants to do, send him to a CC to get his general crap out of the way. Keep encouraging him to find what suits him, but don't force. If he joins the army, so be it... it's a great place for those who don't know what they want to be when they grow up...

Anyhow, I hope your husband can come to terms with whatever is bothering him and can relax his pressure on your son. My parents were pressurers and it did me no good.

[geostump]

Hey, I'm almost 37 and still don't know what I want to be when I grown up. I know that isn't any consulation, but hell, I've made it this far lol.

[Pebbles67]

Jenn - The constant pressure is exactly what is wrong with their relationship. I tend not to add pressure on him and therefore become the "good cop" or "pushover parent" which is wrong as well.

[demuralist]

I also went to a community college, stopped 2 hours short of my AA degree (my poor mom!). Then went to Beauty School. I did finish that, then after a couple of years used that to put myself through school. Everyone has to find their way in their own time. It will work out.

p.s. holy crap, 12 pounds and you are putting exceptions on it. Are you crazy? So what if it is 2 pounds more that pre-Christmas, it is 12 pounds less than 7 days ago, jeez girl!

[athomeontherange]

p.s. holy crap, 12 pounds and you are putting exceptions on it. Are you crazy? So what if it is 2 pounds more that pre-Christmas, it is 12 pounds less than 7 days ago, jeez girl!

what she said.

Also, I did CC to get the prerequisites out of the way and get my study skills crap together.

[canio6]

I went straight to the University and am kicking myself for doing so. Even though FL is insanely cheap (relatively speaking) it still cost far more than it could have. Also, I could have lived rent free and worked more easily. Here is AZ the university is 5 times more expensive than CC. Let's see...Calc I with 20 people for $300 or Calc I with 300 people for $1500? Yeah, nothing wrong with a good community college.

[demuralist]

Canio, UF? what year did you graduate? I graduated in 1991 ( I think).

[naiadknight]

I got all my basics out of the way (except art and a couple GPA boosters) with AP tests and summer classes at the community college system in Dallas. In retrospect, I probably should have left a few more basic for GPA boosts, but C's make degrees.