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Thread: Sabotaging my own success page

  1. #1
    Tara's Avatar
    Tara is offline Senior Member
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    Sabotaging my own success

    I weighed myself on Monday, 127, the lowest I have been in probably 5 years...


    and now the rest of this week I have been eating like crap!! I literally feel like I am sabotaging myself because I obsess over my weight so much that if I finally start losing like I want to, I won't have anything to obsess over anymore.

    Does anyone else feel that they do this? I'm reaching out for some support!! Any suggestions would be SO appreciated


  2. #2
    Enamel's Avatar
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    I used to see a low number on the scale and think it was a free pass for me to eat junk, but I don't think that's the same as what you're doing. I'd suggest ignoring the number on the scale and trying to put obsessive tendencies to good use - e.g. finding a hobby that you enjoy and obsess about being good at it. I don't mean obsessing too literally, because real obsession is stressful in my opinion.

    Wow, I think I went way over my limit of typing obsess and its variants for today, lol.

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    Tara's Avatar
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    Yeah it's weird, I don't think of it as a free pass either, at least not consciously, I actually want to keep on seeing it go down... and plan on eating really clean but I don't know what happens?! It's a little frightening actually... good thinking about the hobby thing though! Might keep me away from being obsessed about food, which obviously is NOT healthy.

  4. #4
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    i think it's worth looking into what the behavioral pattern is and how to unlock it. once it's unlocked, it won't be at issue.

    a lot of people feel, for example, that they don't truly deserve to be healthy. so, they do what they can do avoid it. they love the drama of the yo-yo diet, for example. others just feel that they don't deserve to be a certain weight. sthere could be lots and lots of reasons/options to explore.

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    YES. I have a pattern of this and, in fact, I am doing it right now. Unfortunately, I know it well.

    The best I've ever done was when I had absolutely no idea how much I weighed.

    The best I've FINALLY been able to come up with to deal with this is to get completely out of my own way and continue to take care of myself on a daily basis:
    Do not weigh myself no matter what and have a checklist of health/personal care items I must check off before I can get in bed.
    Vitamins? Check.
    Met water requirements? Check.
    Skin care? Check.
    And so forth....
    Last edited by TigerLily; 12-03-2010 at 08:00 AM.
    "Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food." -- Hippocrates

  6. #6
    SOBE Grok-Star's Avatar
    SOBE Grok-Star is offline Junior Member
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    I completely relate to this, and have been struggling with my obsession with food and body image for a VERY long time. I've been following and loving the PB lifestyle for over 2 months now. I don't view it as a diet, but because of what I am going through in my life at the moment, the weight-loss aspect has become an obsession. Everything else in my life is very peaceful, calm, and drama-free, for ONCE. I've been through a very stressful year (divorce, moving a lot) and have been living alone for 6 months. I've realized that the times in my life that I have struggled with body-image/ food obsession the most, are when I am living alone. I've also noticed that the times I have been the skinniest were when I didn't even think about food, or losing weight.

    For me, I have about 5 pounds of fat that I would like to lose. I am a 31 yr old woman, 5'3, about 22% body fat, and weigh 120 pounds. I know that I am in a healthy range, and I am fairly fit and strong. Over the past 10 years I have been as light as 103 and as heavy as 148. I've been teetering around the 120 zone for a 5 months now. I've been VERY strict with PB for 2 months, but no real change as occured. I'm pretty sure that as long as I obsess, these last few pounds will not budge. And maybe, this is the body shape/weight that I am meant to have, as I am now a woman. It comes down to acceptance, but I have that same sabotaging monster in my head. Instead of eating too much to reward myself, its the opposite...the frustration of being a very clean eater/ exerciser with no results makes me want to binge (and thats with primal food...nuts, dried fruit, dark choc, fruit). Its a horrible cycle.

    Just yesterday, I felt myself let go of the need to CONTROL. This is the one "struggle" of my life right now. As long as I eat these amazingly nourishing foods, and enjoy them consciously, without counting, obsessing, weighing, trying on my jeans every day (insanity), I will be ok.

    Deep breathing helps too.

    Danielle

  7. #7
    PrimalB's Avatar
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    I struggle with the exact same thing. For me, it's a brutal cycle of overeating for days until I can barely fit in my pants and lower my self-esteem to the point where I'll avoid social outings, to a week of eating clean and fitting back in my pants, and then back to the same "free pass" mentality. However, I'm not sure if it's that I feel I have room for going back to indulgent eating patterns (the "free pass") or, like you said Tara, if it's more of a sabotage. What would I do with my time if I weren't obsessing about food? It all seems silly, and I hope we can make it to the point where thinking about something as simple as eating isn't such a stressful burden.

    Maybe Enamel and Tigerlily are right in suggesting to avoid the number on the scale. However, the fit of my clothes also set off the overeating cycle. hm.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by SOBE Grok-Star View Post
    I've also noticed that the times I have been the skinniest were when I didn't even think about food, or losing weight.

    I'm pretty sure that as long as I obsess, these last few pounds will not budge.

    Just yesterday, I felt myself let go of the need to CONTROL. This is the one "struggle" of my life right now. As long as I eat these amazingly nourishing foods, and enjoy them consciously, without counting, obsessing, weighing, trying on my jeans every day (insanity), I will be ok.

    Deep breathing helps too.

    YES, YES, YES.

    For years, my body had a particular set point (that wasn't *my* idea of what my set point should be!) that I pretty much had to abuse myself to get below. I hadn't weighed myself in years (and, not coincidentally, was the thinnest and fittest and strongest in all senses of the word I'd ever been in my adult life), when curiosity got the better of me after my gym put in a scale. It turns out that, without me knowing how much I weighed and being calm inside irt to it all, my body blew straight threw that set point and was actually 7 pounds less! Impossible!

    Looking back on it now, that was the beginning of the end for me. I then, in slow motion, went off the rails....
    "Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food." -- Hippocrates

  9. #9
    a_morgan24's Avatar
    a_morgan24 is offline Senior Member
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    I am right there with you! Been Primal since August, down 21 lbs! Because I was feeling good about the weight loss and had a long and stressful day at work yesterday, I 'rewarded' myself with a disgusting fast food meal and an extra (large) glass of wine. And yes, I feel like hell this morning - ill stomach, low energy, right down to the puffy eyes from the salt.
    I just had to remind myself that the weight isn't the only reason I started Primal - the energy, digestion, and overall feeling healthier was the point so despite the great weight-loss, there is more to it than that.
    So, ham, egg and veggie omelet for breakfast with black coffee and back to CrossFit at noon. At least it doesn't take much to get back into the swing of things

  10. #10
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    Primal Blueprint Expert Certification
    BTW, Congrats on the weight loss and successes so far!

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