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  1. #1
    Tee's Avatar
    Tee
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    Need a Kick in the Behind

    Primal Fuel
    For the past many years I have been grossly over weight. I mean big weight, 200+ over. For years I have been able to lose weight and then put it back on, sometimes more. For the past three years I have been on and off Mark's plan. I bought the book, read his blog most every day, and workout when in the groove.

    Then, boom, I'm off the road and in the ditch. I've been that way for the past month and am getting worried I'll never be able to drop the weight. Any advice would be greatly appreciated in giving me ideas on how to stay the course.

    Thank you very kindly.

  2. #2
    lizch's Avatar
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    //////KICK//////

    Actually, that's not really my style. I think you need to be kind to yourself...forgive yourself the past month, and just get back on track today. The more you kick yourself, or have others kick you, the worse you'll feel about yourself, and the more this cycle will continue. You don't deserve kicking, you just need to step back on the path to better health.
    Liz.

    Zone diet on and off for several years....worked, but too much focus on exact meal composition
    Primal since July 2010...skinniest I've ever been and the least stressed about food

  3. #3
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    It sounds like you've got an "on or off" approach. That's an easy way to derail yourself. Everyone occasionally has foods that are non-Primal. Don't use that as an excuse to do the same thing the next day.
    Rather than worry, start today. If your breakfast sucked this morning, stop there!!! Make lunch good. If you brought in your lunch and it's a mostly bread, THROW IT AWAY! It's not food, so don't worry about wasting it. Stop right now and walk away from the edge of the cliff.

    You can lose the weight and you will lose it, but you have to actually move in the right direction.

    START NOW!

  4. #4
    naiadknight's Avatar
    naiadknight is online now Senior Member
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    *KICK*
    That done, it's up to you to decide how to kick yourself into gear. There is no on and off for Primal. It's all onboard, you just have to minimize the not so good foods and replace them with tasty, fatty foods. 20% and all.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  5. #5
    Uncledave's Avatar
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    I think most of us have been there, losing weight and gaining it back. I've always been overweight and struggling with weight. Several years ago I lost 80 lbs on the Body for Life plan. I gained that all back and added another 60 to it. There have been many a day, I'd give myself in rear if I could, I've certainly done it mentally.

    That was then, this is now. I've been primal/paleo for a few months now and am happy with the results so far. More importantly than the weight I've lost, I FEEL so much better.

    A couple things that I think are important to be successful.
    1. You have to know WHY you are changing your lifestyle. You need a reason that is real enough and strong enough to drive you past obstacles. "I want to improve my health" probably isn't enough. "I want to be able to live long enough to meet my grandchildren" is probably more like it. Whatever it is, you need to determine it and really want it.
    2. You have to find a lifestyle that works for you. I really like the primal/paleo concept and I'm convinced it's a good, healthy lifestyle. On the other hand, it's not going to for everybody. If you are constantly at odds with the foods allowed under this plan you'll have a hard time following it. While we've seen plenty of evidence that calories in vs. calories out isn't totally valid, generally speaking it is. You need to find a healthier mix of foods that reduce your caloric intake below what you are burning. If that isn't 100% primal, I'm guessing it's still a positive step from where you've been.

    I'd also suggest that you try to isolate the foods/situations/moods that lead you to stray and work towards avoiding those or minimizing those. At a minimum recognizing these triggers may help you move past them quicker and on to the path you want to be.

    Above all, don't beat yourself up and don't give up.
    Start weight 403 09/29/2010
    Current weight 335
    On my way to becoming half the man I used to be...

  6. #6
    iniQuity's Avatar
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    The problem I have with people being on and off is that I just don't get why you don't LIKE primal food? What's not to love about eating meat and veggies? I can only assume that you eat "bad stuff" because you find it tastes better (and possibly an underlying addiction issue, social pressures too) and that’s why you eat it…. Right?

    I thought I would struggle a lot coming from a Hispanic background and being used to rice and legumes (beans, mostly) and potatoes with most meals but it wasn’t too tough to just take those out of my plate and replace them with the veggies that I already knew I liked (it can be tough throwing foreign veggies on your plate and expecting love at first bite) so I stuck with the veggies I liked and then introduced more and found that I liked them too.

    You have to identify the reasons why you’re falling off and tackle them slowly and one by one.

    - Refined carbs taste better: Do they? I find most refined carbs are very plain unless they have something on them. White rice is plain, bread is plain, pasta is plain… it’s the sauces, butter, broths, etc that give them taste. In the case of cookies and “treats” with sugar on them, there’s some primal options, I don’t like to advocate them, but it can help you ease into it. Not everyone is made to go sugar-free right away. Rivvin (poster here) usually has some pretty yummy sounding primal desserts you can try to whip up at home. I haven’t made them but others have. Ditch the store bought sugars and make your own with better ingredients that are better for you.

    - Social pressures: If you hang out with people/family that are constantly eating things you don’t WANT to eat (get that in your head) and they expect you to eat them because you always have then you have to have a talk with them and explain what you’re doing. They most likely will say something about how what you’re eating isn’t much better. When I first came to the forums I was told to eat ground beef cooked in bacon grease. My initial reaction was “uhh, sure buddy I’m going to go clog my arteries be back in a sec” but I didn’t yet understand that quality is key here and they weren’t asking me to eat grain fed ground beef with canola oil or something like that. You know better from reading Mark’s site for so long but your friends might not. To them some of your food choices won’t be much different than if you were to get a #3 at McDonald’s. I know I felt like that reading some of the poster’s typical heavy-fat meals. I couldn’t believe this was healthy or could actually help you lose weight. Now that I’ve experienced it myself I’m proud to tell my friends I eat tons of saturated fat (animal fat and coconut oil) and not only do I enjoy myself I feel better and have dropped weight. Educating your friends and family is very important, you need their support.

    - Other triggers: Places you go to that make you want to eat shit foods, learn to maneuver around them and avoid them. I smell people’s breakfasts at work everyday and still find the smell of toast extremely appealing but I just don’t eat it. Maybe it takes mental fortitude, but having the knowledge about grains, gluten, lectins, etc, makes me think “boy, that sure smells great, too bad it’s shit food, wish I could eat it though!” I don’t think there’s anything wrong with acknowledging that you want to have something but understanding that you shouldn’t.

    - Be a big girl: Ultimately, you’re responsible for your choices. I’m not about to berate you, but you decide what you eat each and every single time. Use this to empower you, don’t be helpless to foods that do NOTHING for you. Eat for power, eat for nutrition, eat for energy, eat for taste. Ask yourself “is this DELICIOUS AND NUTRITIUOS” (by MDA/PB standards) if so, eat up! If it’s only one but not the other then don’t bother! There’s plenty of things that are very nutritious that I don’t find to be tasty, I may choke them down from time to time but I don’t eat them all the time (or at all) even though I know it’s good for me (I can’t think of examples, I think I honestly eat everything, but I’m just saying, there’s people that don’t like broccoli for instance, so they probably don’t eat it as much as I do) the inverse is also true, I find pizza to be delicious, but I know it’s far from nutritious so I don’t eat it except veeeerrryyyy rarely, and I prefer thin crust so I limit the amount of flour I eat, and don’t eat the crust, that sort of stuff. You make the decisions, always always always.

    - Don’t beat yourself up: Ok, so you had something you know you shouldn’t, or you’ve been consistently doing so, just shake it off and start eating right. Take some responsibility though, this is your life.

    Hope that helped. I’m bored and alone at work with time to write, hope it wasn’t too wordy.

  7. #7
    iniQuity's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uncledave View Post
    I think most of us have been there, losing weight and gaining it back. I've always been overweight and struggling with weight. Several years ago I lost 80 lbs on the Body for Life plan. I gained that all back and added another 60 to it. There have been many a day, I'd give myself in rear if I could, I've certainly done it mentally.

    That was then, this is now. I've been primal/paleo for a few months now and am happy with the results so far. More importantly than the weight I've lost, I FEEL so much better.

    A couple things that I think are important to be successful.
    1. You have to know WHY you are changing your lifestyle. You need a reason that is real enough and strong enough to drive you past obstacles. "I want to improve my health" probably isn't enough. "I want to be able to live long enough to meet my grandchildren" is probably more like it. Whatever it is, you need to determine it and really want it.
    2. You have to find a lifestyle that works for you. I really like the primal/paleo concept and I'm convinced it's a good, healthy lifestyle. On the other hand, it's not going to for everybody. If you are constantly at odds with the foods allowed under this plan you'll have a hard time following it. While we've seen plenty of evidence that calories in vs. calories out isn't totally valid, generally speaking it is. You need to find a healthier mix of foods that reduce your caloric intake below what you are burning. If that isn't 100% primal, I'm guessing it's still a positive step from where you've been.

    I'd also suggest that you try to isolate the foods/situations/moods that lead you to stray and work towards avoiding those or minimizing those. At a minimum recognizing these triggers may help you move past them quicker and on to the path you want to be.

    Above all, don't beat yourself up and don't give up.
    Wow, I was writing my reply as you were posting yours and we said almost the same thing in the same order. Nuts.

  8. #8
    Uncledave's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iniQuity View Post
    Wow, I was writing my reply as you were posting yours and we said almost the same thing in the same order. Nuts.
    You said it better and it's gotta be GREAT advice if we both said it right?
    Start weight 403 09/29/2010
    Current weight 335
    On my way to becoming half the man I used to be...

  9. #9
    Tawny's Avatar
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    I'm still struggling with the problem of "falling off the wagon", but I'm much quicker to get back on - it used to be weeks of carb-fests before I could get it back together to eat primally. Now, it's only a day or two, and much less frequent than it used to be. I think someone else said to forgive yourself - know that you are going to make mistakes, but that YOU are in control of what you put in your mouth. It will get easier.

    I also tend to operate on the assumption that the United States government is trying to do all they can to get as much money out of me as they can and that processed foods=more money out of my pocket for the government. My whole "conspiracy mentality" helps me when I go grocery shopping. Sometimes I fail and buy some less than ideal foods, but this keeps me on track most of the time. Plus, when I fail, I blame the government - takes the guilt off of me and gives me the power to get back on track You need to find out what your hook is - why do you want to follow the PB lifestyle?

  10. #10
    zoebird's Avatar
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    i would look at why/when you "fall off the wagon."

    emotional eating (EE) is a huge thing in my family, and it was about 4-5 years ago that i really confronted it. there are times when i still EE, but i am very conscious about it. First, i identify (I am EE), then i acknowledge (when i EE, I am upset about something else), and then i analyze (what am i upset about, and is food helping?).

    This, then, advanced to checking in when i have a craving. If i am craving cookies or whatever, i check in: Am i trying to solve an emotional issue by eating? How am i really feeling? Once i check in, i realize that the craving itself dissipates, and a real solution presents itself.

    and yes, sometimes it sucks to have to own your feelings. Just last week, i had to own anger, sadness, frustration, resentment, and some more anger. And it went back 10 years--what a rabbit hole that was! it was a tough 4-5 days (and i'm sure there's more work to come. this was just the beginning of this particular work).

    so, it might be helpful for you. You decide you want to eat primal (or whatever), and you follow the info above, and then, when you have a craving--Check In. You might just find that you don't really have the craving, your'e just falling into a habitual coping pattern.

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