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Thread: Managing Overconfidence page

  1. #1
    Gathwh's Avatar
    Gathwh is offline Senior Member
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    Managing Overconfidence

    Disclamer: I put this here not because I think I have become more aggressive because of paleo+IF, I just think you can help me. I don't want to be a troll.

    I just realized that I did several things that are really rude recently, and due to there embarrassing rudeness I will not mention them again. Is there anything that can help this acting without thinking thing? Would you recommend mediation, etc?

  2. #2
    jspradley's Avatar
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    Take a breath or 20 and think before you say stuff. Ignore the little things that don't matter. And get laid/jack off a lot! lol

    Meditation is good stuff too... yoga, excersize, stuff like that.

  3. #3
    Gathwh's Avatar
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    The real problem was this was an action that I felt like it was reflexive, and was not an angry one, just a not thinking one. i.e. I don't do this but bringing attention to a physical deformity. I didn't try to be mean, but I was.

  4. #4
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    Don't press "send" for 5 minutes after writing the post. Go get something to drink, walk around the room, come back and re-read it. If it still sounds reasonable, then send.

  5. #5
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    The only way I know of to change any behavior is to learn to reflect before you act. You have to practice it, just like with exercise. So, as ridiculous as it may feel, set up scenarios where you can practice pausing before reacting/responding. It's nice if you know someone who can role play with you, but if no, you can use any real life situation. For instance, you can walk into a meeting knowing you're going to allow a 5 second pause-and-think before you say anything. If you think you'll have a hard time, try wearing a wristband or making a little mark with a pen on your hand or a piece of paper in front of you to help you remember. Do this over and over until it's a habit. During the refection time, you can ask yourself if what you're about to say meets the following criteria, is it: timely, necessary or humorous, relevant, true, and stated as kindly as possible.

    This method has been really useful to me. I used to make witty comments at the expense of others pretty frequently. I'm good at it, and I got good laughs and respect for how quick I was, but ultimately I hurt a lot of feelings and people learned to be guarded around me. It took about a year of practice before my nature changed. I still crack jokes, but I have to work harder to come up with good ones that aren't directed toward the people around me.

  6. #6
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    Arikara6 is offline Senior Member
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    When talking on a radio, it's push to talk, not push to think.

    Adapted to your computer - think before you click send/post.

    BTW, we all do stupid stuff sometimes - we learn when we admit mistakes, then take a hard look at ourselves to fix them.
    +1 to you.

  7. #7
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    And that all being said - I'm DYING to know what it is you did.
    Because I'm a bored, and nosey screwball whose novacaine is wearing off. (this means cranky too)

  8. #8
    Gathwh's Avatar
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    The bad jokes are another problem I have. +1 for junebu8

  9. #9
    Bane's Avatar
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    I have this same problem, getting a little ruder, more aggressive, and my patience is definitely disappearing. Could be the caveman thing, but maybe it's just getting older and grumpier.

    Also the fact that people are such assholes these days. I swear I have entire days where every customer of mine, every person I talk to in stores, every store clerk, every person who serves me a coffee, is a complete ignorant ASSHOLE. I swear one of these days I'm going to be up on assault charges.

    People today are fucked.

  10. #10
    kuno1chi's Avatar
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    Primal Blueprint Expert Certification
    My Grandma used to tell me, if one person in your day is an asshole, it's on him.
    If every person in your day is an asshole...it's on YOU

    (and she was from Austria... so it was really cute to hear her say AZZ-hoh-la.)

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