Yeah, I totally relate to what you say about the jeans and the mirror! I've had 4 kids, and the rebound got slower and less definite with each one. by number 4 I was wrecked! More stretch marks than belly, a separated rectus abdominus, a pelvic floor that's more like a hammock than a trampoline. The list could go on, but I'd just be depressing myself.
The mindset I'm shooting for is like Marcadav's - acceptance and a look at the big picture things. I know for sure that when I start to really angst over the size of my belly that there's more wrong in my life than just the belly. Usually I'm also sleep deprived, or coming down off an endorphine spike or something. Not huge, but enough that my brain isn't my friend any more. When I'm 'intact' so to speak, I can mostly enjoy my body and forget about all it's faults.
One thing I've done here, though, is to stop reading threads about calorie counting and goal setting. Weight goals just don't work for me - the whole idea that I can control what those numbers say is an illusion, and it's one that makes me feel very miserable and angry. Calorie counting is too close to the lifestyle that not only didn't work, but has caused me heaps of physical and emotional pain. When I read those threads I just feel so discouraged.
I have no idea whether this ramble has helped or not. Just wanted to empathise I guess.
What year of your study are you in? (Just wondering about your assignment, lol).