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    Jasetyn's Avatar
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    Primal Journal (Tsestina)

    Primal Fuel
    I had a journal here a while back and thought it was excellent, so here I am again! I have been 80% primal for about 9 months now, fitting that in with FODMAP and SCD diets roughly, and my Crohn's disease symptoms are practically non-existent. When I started this journey I was incredibly fat and sick. It took a lot of work, mental effort and learning through mistakes to get me to this point: 4 months away from my 24th b-day! I have a weight loss goal, and a plan. I currently weigh 170 with a lot of fat storage around my thighs, waist, hips and arms. This fat storage is due to pretty simple things; crap food and crap-all exercise. I love primal, it works for me (when modified accordingly to Crohn's) and my plan is a 60/30/10 fat, protein, carbs plan based around my BMR, and 5 days of resistance training/cardio primally set-up (so sprints, body weight exercises etc). I will be logging my nutrition and exercise here everyday (or every other day depending on schoolwork) so yeah...that's me. Oh, btw I am not starting out 100% primal, because for me that would be instant failure. So YES I am aware artifical sweetener will kill me but until I wean off of it, I'm keeping it. Hopefully in the next month I can make that step!

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    So today August 30th is the first day! I did a lot of thinking and talking to my best friend (husband) last night, and I realized a lot about my eating. Most people probably come on here and eat primally to feel a bit better physically, but I bet there are a lot of us who are struggling with some serious emotional and spiritual baggage. I know I am! I watched Chris Rocks doco "Good Hair" the other night, and something Al Sharpton said on it really struck me. He was talking about weaves and wigs and what not and he said something akin to "how can you stop being oppressed when you shove your oppression on (talking about putting on wigs etc) everyday?" and I thought, black women are so gorgeous and special how could they do that to themselves? Then I realized...I do that to myself! As a native woman I EAT my oppression everyday. My body is not developed for grains, dairy products, lots of sugar, sweetener or even a macronutrient ratio with an emphasis on carbohydrate. I realize I have a ways to go because I'm still consuming peanut butter and sweetener, but I just want to be better for my husband, myself, my community, and my world for pete's sake....gotta stop eatin' that oppression!

    Today, thus far:
    2 T. natural PB
    2 T. coconut cream
    1 t. cocoa
    sweetener to taste
    w/
    I hot cocoa made with 1 1/2 T. cocoa, 1 T. coconut cream and hot water and sweetener to taste.

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    Ugh, awful week, but great as well. We have had a massive earthquake, my marriage has been shaken, my life choices have been re-assessed, HOLY COW! I am fully aware I am an addict to food! I can't go without it, I love making my body feel sick and tired and fat, it's a horrible off-shoot of a very troubled upbringing. BUT, I'm an adult now, I place responsibility where its due and I am going to be a miserable whiny sack for the next few weeks. I have to do it cold-turkey. I've done it before, it took a few weeks for the headaches to go away, but the sugar cravings never did. I was eating LOADS of peanut butter (like a jar every 2 days loads) but my sweetener consumption is insane now. I get cranky if I haven't had any, I have to dose myself every few hours, it's rubbish, I want Freedom! But also not, because it's comfortable to be the victim and be crap. *Sigh* Gotta do this, gonna do this. Gotta do it for myself. I actually love myself and don't want this pain anymore. God help me! Tomorrow, starting. Coconut oil (if I can get any, earthquake might prevent this) meat and some greens and celtic salt. Light exercise, pilates and light resistance as well as the usual lots of walking.

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    And again On Metformin, will be doing a version of PSMF with low-fat organic yogurt (plain), lean chicken and beef and steamed veggies as the daily fare. Will add b12 and fish oil supplements when I get paid. Need to lose 40 pounds to be in the healthy range for my height, don't really have a goal date, just focusing on everyday. I have zouk on mondays and zumba on wednesdays so that's 2 hours of 'movement' along with 2 days of full body resistance training during the week.

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    Wow! Learned heaps in the last couple of days. On Metoformin for exactly a week now and the adjustments have been weird. Sex is a little painful, my emotions are going a mile a minute and each day is very different from the next! I just read the 'unconquerable dave' story sent to my inbox from Mark, amazing!! It just really made it hit home for me that 'dieting' (in the common use of the term) is just not the way to go for me. I don't want to be thinner or fitter than I used to be or like I used to be, I want to stop making comparisons and live everyday WELL. That means nixing foods that just hurt be real bad (damn you dairy and caffeine!) and DEFINATELY cutting out ALL starches, grains, legumes etc. I have done this 'sort of' before for 8 months and it was miserable because I was replacing the sugar cravings with peanut butter...LOADS of it. Like, a jar every 2 days! My relationship with food has always been poor, but now i know it simply doesn't have to be that way. I want to be healthy, I want to be able to move better on the dance floor and possibly compete soon...as Dave has shown me, that is so a possibility with primal eating! I can't believe how much his story hit home for me. And the other day I drove past a sign that said 'crossfit'..I may just stop by soon! So..diet with consist of protein foods (CLEAN) no modern salt as I just load up on it, a piece of fruit per day (low G.I) and 1 square of lindt 85% choc. at night, if I feel like it. I'll have my husband dole that out to me to help me stay on track. Of course veggies will be included and lots of fish oil, as it helps me with inflammation. I'm apprehensive and excited, but I'm just going to take it day by day and grow into it, I need to learn to be patient, and just by doing this I think I'm already learning! I'm off to the grocery store right now and will post my food at the end of the day. I can't guarantee today is going to be perfect, but I'm going to take it as it comes!

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    Man life is up in the air!!! For fricks sake. I'm coping better now though. I live in CHristchurch NZ and we're in a national state of emergency since Tuesday last week when an earthquake took a lot from us here. Eating has been crazy and all over the place. I looked at my face in the mirror this morning and cried...what a freakin year so far. Even if I know primal will be slow going, I'm at least trying to temper my binge eating and junk food consumption. I really have no clue where to start..it's doubtful we'll have money to buy much food, I just can't plan anything.

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    Trying to use up some whey protein I've got with artificial sweeteners in it so:

    March 1, 2011:
    2 scoops powder with one egg cooked in butter (twice)
    1 orange
    1 small decaf soy mocha
    handful of peanuts
    3 chicken drumsticks and some chuckwagon corn
    1 nectarine
    1 slice wheatmeal toast with butter
    1 nut/fruit bar
    1 black lady grey tea
    2 mint-chocolate cookies

    It's junk, but it's a beginning!
    Last edited by Jasetyn; 03-01-2011 at 12:09 PM. Reason: updating info

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    Hugs! You can do it!
    Ancestral Health Info

    I design websites and blogs for a living. If you would like a blog or website designed by someone who understands Primal, see my web page.

    Primal Blueprint Explorer My blog for people who are not into the Grok thing. Since starting the blog, I have moved close to being Archevore instead of Primal. But Mark's Daily Apple is still the best source of information about living an ancestral lifestyle.

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    Hey there, Jasetyn. I'm in Hamilton, pretty steady ground up here right now, but so incredibly sad for what you've been through.

    I've been in a place of swallowing oppression and generally being out of control. My path to this way of eating has been through Marianne Williamson's book A Course in Weight Loss. She has a website, too. It's a spiritual journey for me, learning to know who I am and what makes me tick. All the psychology and therapy in the world didn't do it, but this book did. It's quite christian in its language, but not in its intent. Not sure if this helps - if not then totally ignore me!!

    Where are you from originally?

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    Hey! Thanks a lot for that info Jac, I'm a theology student so spirituality is close to my heart I'm originally from the USA, but I married a kiwi when I was 19 and have been studying here in Christchurch. I appreciate you sharing a bit of your journey with me, it helps to know you're not alone in feeling out of control! Blessings, and keep in touch

    For todays food so far:
    March 2 2011:
    2 scoops whey powder with one egg, cooked in butter topped with 3 T. peanut butter
    1 slice wheatmeal toast with butter and peanut butter
    lady grey tea with milk and sweetener
    School lunch was 2 small subway sandwiches and 3 small glasses of sprite
    bag of chips
    2 candy bars
    Gonna be hard to break these habits!!

    But obviously going to have to do it because as I write this on the next day I have been in hospital all night long with another 'episode'. Awesome.
    Last edited by Jasetyn; 03-02-2011 at 04:43 PM.

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