Primal Journal of a sweet-toothed girl
Hi everybody, I'm a 18-year-old girl from the Philippines, but I live in Italy, so please correct me if I make mistakes or you don't understand what I mean, I try my best
I'm neither too fat nor thin, just a bit fit, but I've always wanted a super skinny and healthy body. When my boyfriend told me about the Paleo diet six months ago, I felt really excited because finally I found how to realize my dream. Although I gave up pasta, bread and rice, I couldn't say goodbye to a relationship: sweets.
I have a terrible addiction to sugar, especially when things go bad. I confess that a year ago I was a bulimic person, I thought that I wasn't worth since nobody seems to appreciate me, but, fortunately, I decided to visit a psychologist and I felt better. In fact, I fall in love with a man who changed my life completely and he is still my lover now. However, when I met him, I started to have big troubles with my parents because they couldn't accept him (he is 9 years older than me) and the fact that I was growing up. This led me to be much dependent on sweets, but I'm going to stop it.
Even though I can't solve the problems with my parents (it's a very complicated story and I still have anger), I don't want to be addicted to sweets anymore, I desire to have a perfect body, to be the best in my life. It is absurd that I've always blamed myself, hated myself, while I have a boyfriend who loves me and has faith in me more than I do.
A new journey starts now
Ps. I don't want to write down how I overate today, I'm going to do it tomorrow :P
Last edited by nanetta; 11-06-2014 at 02:16 PM.
My challange: having a stripper's body (it is so cool)
Hight: 158 cm
Weight: 57 kg (D
S: a little hot chocolate (after a writing exam of three hours)
L: salad with some meat, 2 egges with tomato sauce
I went to the gym in the evening. Lifting heavy weights slowly is so exciting, especially when I am the only girl in the gym :P
L: salad, 1 egg, 3 slices of salami + tuna + peanuts
WOD: walking for an hour
This is a photo of me in last June, when my weight was 53 kg. Why did I gain weight then?
Well, I absolutely desired to join a course of learning, memory techniques and speed reading (so cool), but my parents didn't want to pay it and we had such a terrible argument that I can't forget it.
Then I decided to find a employment to pay it by myself. After giving c.v. in some restaurants and cafes, I got a job as a waitress in a popular restaurant in my town. I used to work every day and come back home at 2 am by bike for two months, so I was very stressed and tired, also because it was my first work experience. This led me to bingeing and overeating like never before and I felt really disappointed with myself. However, we are human beings and we can make mistakes, just go on and learn from them.
After this experience I got a tattoo of a lotus on my lower back as it means progress and perfection. Although I gained weight and I couldn't lose it since I started to go to school and have problems with py parents again, I have faith now that I can have the sexy body I want
Last edited by nanetta; 11-09-2014 at 12:53 PM.
S: clementine + apple + banana
D: tuna, onion, tomato sauce + 2 of my special sweet (coconut flour, 1 egg, cocoa powder) + some sweets from Sicily ()
WOD: walking for an hour
I had a sugar craving today since I had an argument with my parents again. It is very difficult to lose weight when I have this kind of problems, but I have faith in myself because this is the key of success
L: ham steak + mortadella + fried zucchini + 2 eggs + 4 little wurstels + 2 sweets from Sicily
S: pear + sweets from Sicily
D: sweets Sicily + 2 crepes
Today I overate and craved today, again, as I was very stressed and a little sad bacause of what happened yesterday. My boyfriend told me that I'm too dramatic like the characters in Beautiful and I should have fun in my life. He's completely right.
This week I promise to myself that I'll have the big and lovely smile that you see in my profile picture. In that pic I was really happy because it was the first time that I was given yellow roses (my favourite) by a boyfriend
Last edited by nanetta; 11-11-2014 at 12:40 PM.
I know it's not my place but you're already very slender and I'm concerned that you're so harsh on yourself and eating so little to get even thinner! Eat healthy and embrace being fit, not super super skinny - female bodies aren't supposed to be as lean as men's, we need fat to be healthy.
Hi MuchLove, thank you for your reply. It is very kind from you to say those things about me
Originally Posted by MuchLove
I always visualise myself being skinny because, if I desire this result, I must eat primal and work out very hard. I desire not only to be thin, but also to be really healthy and have energy in my life. As well as that, the health of the brain depends on what you eat and how you are fit. I saw an alcohol abuser's brain scan Dr. Amen did and I was terrified by that as being a sugar addicted is almost the same.
B: nespresso ("what else?")
L: omelette, eggplant + salad, tuna + ham steak
S: sweets from Sicily + coconut butter
D: cucumber + apple
WOD: 2 sprints with cyclette after breakfast
Today my deskmate was very very sad. I asked her why and she told me that one of her best friends of Biella (my deskmate comes from there) died suddenly suddenly yesterday. The girl was only eighteen years old like me.
This led me to thinking that life is short and there is no time to complain. We will be dead one day, although we don't know when, so we must be grateful for everything we have in our lives.
B: espresso (the last)
D: salad, meat, onion
D: eggplant + broccoli + tomato sauce, tuna, onion
S: hot chocolate with my boyfriend in a pub where there was the karaoke (next time I will sing)
WOD: 2 sprints with the cyclette after breakfasta
My boyfriend was surprised by my big and lovely smile today because he wasn't used to it in this period. I've never feel so great since a long time and I'm sure that I will feel better with the rhodiola. I used to take it last year, but it was a bit expensive for my little pocket money and my mom thought I was taking drugs, although it seems something like that because I was really powerful and happy. I've recently seen a video in which a doctor said that she takes it to balance her hormones and, after talking to my boyfriend about it, he suggested me to buy it on prozis. I found the rhodiola very cheap and of a good quality, so I ordered it for my boyfriend and me and it arrived today.
Life is cool
L: 2 eggs, onion + broccoli
S: 4 wurstels
D: hot chocolate + cannolo + crepes
I have a bad sweet tooth