"censoring", and therefore it should be called censoring.
You want Facebook to censor the healthy and beautiful mother, but you want the censorship to be covered up with a different word. What word?
Last edited by DavidBrennan; 02-18-2014 at 03:20 AM.
If she was simply saying 'I'm proud of myself' that would be one thing. But what she is saying is 'why don't you look like me?' THAT is bullying.
I think the problem with Kang's was her approach.
"what's your excuse?" -- subtext, you are a failure and a problem if you don't look like me.
I don't look like her. I also don't have 3 kids (another failure?). I also work (another failure?) rather than having a partner wealthy enough to support me (another failure?) which completely doesn't even recognize that I might *enjoy* the work that I do and the amount of hours that I put into it.
So, you know, when I read her message -- as a fit person -- I was like "why would i use your effing ruler/standard?"
I had a problem with her "message" too. As a working mom of only one, I should be totally more glamourous and have a totally nicer/fancier house and as fit or more fit than she is. Why aren't i? What's my excuse?
Oh, my excuse is -- I don't want to live her life or her way. So, that's my excuse. And i'm *FIT*.
Now, on the flip side, I think that attacking people who are thin/fit are also part of the problem. We aren't lucky -- it's a simple process of good food in the proper amounts, adequate movement, and plenty of sleep. Yes, there will be some people who will never get thin by beauty standards, but she can still be fit.
We know that's the common knowledge, and we know that the excuses are many. BUT, it's also ok for someone to say "you know what? I'm prioritizing something else." So, their health might get the hit, but the rest of it? eh, whatever.
Sure, but she also would not have been as attacked as she was.
I call that the "common criticism." Women really can't win for losing (as my husband says). If you work, you neglect your kids. If you stay at home, you are not contributing to the family's bottom line and/or choosing poverty etc. If you work out, you are self centered,if you don't work out, then you are lazy. etc etc etc.
I guess I'm just so used to that, I hardly see it as criticism.
Last edited by zoebird; 02-18-2014 at 09:27 AM.
Well, while I do not agree 100% with the fit mom's approach, let's not fool ourselves into thinking that persons do not make excuses for being unfit/over weight. Hell, I still make excuses at 100 pounds less than my start weight. Also, am I the only one who has ever met the pregnant woman who is 'eating for two'? Which based on what is on her plate would make sense if the other one was a T-Rex. I mean, do tadpole-sized pre-humans really need 2 pints of ice cream and a jar of peanut butter? Perhaps they do. I dunno. But I have seen pregnant women eat well and exercise and end up with a healthy baby and also maintain their fitness and have also seen women do nothing but eat and gain 50 pounds and shrug saying "Well, I just had a baby." One is an excuse. It might not be nice to say it, nor will we all look like the chick with 3 kids, but lets not pass off personal responsibility completely here.
BTW it is not bullying to say "Hey, I have 3 kids and look awesome. You don't." That is called reality. Brad Pitt is not bullying me if he says, "Dude, you don't have these abs." He's right. I don't.
somehow I manage to leave my intelligence and decorum at the door wherever I go. I doubt your journal will be an exception to that - not on the rug
What the F&#* is a decorum? - Mr. Anthony
It's our bullshit PC culture. Soon, no criticism of anything or anyone will be okay. Everything is about acceptance of everything and everyone. Sorry, but not everything is acceptable and not everyone should be tolerated. This mentality is what will lead us to the Wall-E world.