You overthink the "tribal" life and try to generalize it to anything. The truth is that it all depends on what type of males you are selecting
I am not a bodybuilding/fat loss/strength training "guru" BUT I achieved a lean state with ease after learning the correct way to train and eat and I want to HELP YOU achieve the same.
Getting fit is also about managing your mindset:
Just because a person is bad (or inexperienced) on a given day doesn't mean that it's ad infinitum or reductionist. If a person is 'bad' -- then the foundation of trust in the relationship can be a space for dialogue about what was not pleasurable about the experience and then an exploration of how to make the experience more pleasurable for both parties.
In my own relationship, my husband and I are highly specialized to each other. Over the 15 years of our relationship (and each being each other's "firsts" from our early 20s), I can say that we started out quite "bad" in bed. Over time we have explored, experimented, communicated, and ultimately created a really fun, "skilled" sex life.
But those skills may not transfer to another sexual encounter or relationship. Parts of it will -- such as the confidence, experience of my own body, and possibility the ability to communicate what I want (which I can openly do with my partner while we are progressing through orgasms! weeeee!). But other parts of it may not because I don't yet have the skills attuned specifically to him.
As such, he might think that I'm "bad in bed" and therefore we are not "sexually compatible."
But what if, instead of just making that assumption and jumping ship, he assumed that perhaps I was both eager to learn and eager to please because I wanted to continue a relationship with him? That I wanted to have all of the benefits of a great relationship over time -- including a really vibrant, specialized, pleasurable sex life?
I truly believe that a person can learn to be "good in bed" -- if both parties are invested in co-creating that.
And it's sad to me that I might be judged on one or a handful of sexual experiences to determine "compatibility" when the other aspects of the relationship may demonstrate that more, and htis particular skill can be learned.
Plus, it completely ignores the reality of male sexual jealousy and kind of pretends we are all bonobos living in a tribal setting of small groups of people, which is a nice fantasy. But that's all it is, a fantasy.
Disclaimer: I eat 'meat and vegetables' ala Primal, although I don't agree with the carb curve. I like Perfect Health Diet and WAPF Lactofermentation a lot.
Griff's cholesterol primer
5,000 Cal Fat <> 5,000 Cal Carbs
Winterbike: What I eat every day is what other people eat to treat themselves.
TQP: I find for me that nutrition is much more important than what I do in the gym.
bloodorchid is always right