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  1. Replies
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    ZOMG, stop posting pictures of mother panda in my...

    ZOMG, stop posting pictures of mother panda in my journal!!!
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    Sigh. Hate-watching Santa Baby videos now. *...

    Sigh. Hate-watching Santa Baby videos now.

    * shakes fist at bloodorchid *
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    It's a trick question. You are thinking 'potato'.

    It's a trick question. You are thinking 'potato'.
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    I wrote that post thinking bloodorchid is totally...

    I wrote that post thinking bloodorchid is totally going to Santa Baby me now.

    And she did!!!
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    I have made it almost halfway through December...

    I have made it almost halfway through December without hearing 'Santa Baby' in stores.

    2014, you're a winner.
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    I'm gay AND a panda! Check and mate. I was...

    I'm gay AND a panda!

    Check and mate.

    I was just on the receiving end (at a dinner party no less) of a drunken woman's sexual confessions. The conversation was about wine sales and the drought...
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    I've been lucky - every time I've gone down...

    I've been lucky - every time I've gone down there, the weather has been lovely. I went to Montrio Bistro for dinner one night and it gets two panda paws up and a five-NOM rating. I would really...
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    How many of you put your Thanksgiving turkey into...

    How many of you put your Thanksgiving turkey into a 5-gallon bucket to brine for two days before Thanksgiving??? I need to find some different recipes, although Lady Friend said I could borrow her...
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    Just got back from a three-day trip to Monterey,...

    Just got back from a three-day trip to Monterey, where dolphins, otters, pelicans, and a zombie sea lion patiently put up with me staring at them from the balcony of my hotel room. Did no work,...
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    Those shows are a public service. They always...

    Those shows are a public service. They always motivate me to get off the panda fanny and start scrubbing something. And send me screaming in horror out of the living room, too. (Thank you, Diaper...
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    Glad you finished it! And I'm also glad there...

    Glad you finished it! And I'm also glad there will be no Volume VII, because that series was really upsetting to write.
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    A vegetarian friend of mine had to leave the...

    A vegetarian friend of mine had to leave the table at a restaurant once because I was eating steak and that gave her The Sads.
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    http://i.giphy.com/X35necnRanNG8.gif

    http://i.giphy.com/X35necnRanNG8.gif
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    Help, everyone!!! Send Walrus your heaviest-duty...

    Help, everyone!!! Send Walrus your heaviest-duty palate cleansers!!!

    17855
    17854
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    He's being sold as attractive, but I'm not buying...

    He's being sold as attractive, but I'm not buying it. On the Man Scale of:

    http://i.giphy.com/EOfarA6ZUqzZu.gif


    to

    http://i.giphy.com/3f6kmlg53vCX6.gif

    this guy is somewhere in the...
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    He does look like he's drawling out a 'yeeee-ep'!...

    He does look like he's drawling out a 'yeeee-ep'!

    Christian Grey is Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel after a bath, de-lousing, and charm school.
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    The Doof Level of these two is at critical...

    The Doof Level of these two is at critical levels.

    http://i.giphy.com/UfcxgslDmMYZa.gif
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    http://i.giphy.com/v5DzFPQJEnGE.gif

    http://i.giphy.com/v5DzFPQJEnGE.gif
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    http://i.giphy.com/2iODRXAkSdX0s.gif ...

    http://i.giphy.com/2iODRXAkSdX0s.gif




    http://i.giphy.com/3sV6yZJTk2WFq.gif
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    I just hate-watched the 50 Shades of Grey...

    I just hate-watched the 50 Shades of Grey trailers, and it seems that the good fellows of Casting forgot to include chemistry amongst the characters. Seriously? The two of them got nothing. I have...
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    Lady Friend is an extremely important person at...

    Lady Friend is an extremely important person at work, with a calendar full of appointments, interviews for articles and radio, and a staff of minions who run around to do her bidding*. But she found...
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    Your scaly ass is mine, Smaug.* * Not in a...

    Your scaly ass is mine, Smaug.*

    * Not in a perverted way.
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    !!!Enjoy!!! That series was my favorite to...

    !!!Enjoy!!! That series was my favorite to write. I wish I were writing it right now and not The Least Favorite Series Ever.

    I'm done editing for the day and have to decide . . . walk on the...
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    Dear Book Thief, You have read-and-returned...

    Dear Book Thief,

    You have read-and-returned your way through the entire six-volume Zombies series. Now you have read-and-returned your way through the entire Sigils trilogy. I made Runefool free...
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    UPDATE: (in explanation of *) * Or in Gay...

    UPDATE: (in explanation of *)

    * Or in Gay Panda’s case, covered in zits and glasses and braces, and a hair part that never parted in just the right way to attract an admirer.
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