You are certqinly not 'a bit thick'. I have never intended to talk down to you. My career had taught me to speak authoratively (even when I'm wrong). I'm trying to learn to change that, it's unappealing.
I can not fulfill your requirements. I am sometimes happy, sad, joyous, depressed, grumpy and complaining, frghtened, angry, and usually curious.
You do not appear to be a negative woman to me, Crypto! When I said 'constant', he really was... constantly complaining...
I like authoritative. I [I]really[/I] like the type of self-correcting authoritative that goes 'this is how it is'. 'Oops, no, talking bollocks there, [I]this[/I] is how it is', and so on and so on. Better than wishy-washying about. I too had to learn to say 'Yes, Prime Minister, that is absolutely how it is. No, Prime Minister, there isn't anything else you need to know', and then run away hyperventilating and with fingers crossed... :) - it may be unappealing but I'm not changing now.
I have been absent a few days because I have been annoyed with myself for not doing some things I should have done. There is never enough time! Never!
I am still proudly paleo though, and you wouldn't believe the number of cakes and biscuits that are thrust at me in the office every day. I've just made the most gorgeous goulash (without the rice) and am feeling full and happy, if not quite virtuous (see things undone comment above). Not been back on the tracker yet - I'm still feeling a bit too rebellious - perhaps it's the Spring, which finally sprang here over the weekend. That, incidentally, gives me a probable growing season of about 3 months, which is barely enough time to grown an adult bloody cauliflower.
I tried to catch up on your journal, but every time I click on page 8, it takes me straight back to page 2! I can't progress past page 7. Perhaps you could repeat some of it here... or hurry on to page 9, which I might be able to go straight to... <wheedles nicely>...?
Well, journal, there's not much to report. I'm still paleoing, I haven't eaten any sugar, or wheat, or grains, or legumes. Anything, in fact, that isn't still bleeding or leaking in some way.
These last 6 days I've been a good girl and planted out the veg, reseeded part of the lawn, mown the rest, dug over a number of beds, weeded the herbaceous beds and border, got the greenhouse tomatoes, cucumbers and pumpkins sorted, pricked out all my seedlings into larger pots - as well as my week at work and weekend gardening work. I've learnt how to build a corporate website (and built it) whilst doing the day job and covering for someone else with a broken arm, poor lass, and split and potted up plants for a charity sale next week. 'Phoned my parents, gone out with colleagues/friends for a (surprisingly) good time. Finished and delivered the crochet baby blanket for a neighbour's 7-day old baby, gone boozing for the evening in the sunshine with neighbours and relatives, and paid the rest of my garage bill off.
So why do I feel so flat this week. Journal, answer me that. I feel a bit of a failure - and that is emphatically NOT the happy mood I've been experiencing for the last [however many it is] weeks it is since starting this way of eating gave me so much more energy. Something, somewhere, has buggered up, and I can't work out what it is.
Journal note for the day: eat more bloody cheese. Fuck it. Rather a happy rash than a dismal glow.
Blindingly Obvious (in hindsight) Fact:
Alcohol is a depressant - I [I]know[/I] this. But I suppose amongst all the white noise going on in my food intake it rather got lost. Now that I eat so very cleanly, blips become properly, truly noticeable (see vomiting episodes and cheese rashes above...).
So what was different about last week, compare to happy bouncy me in previous weeks? Socialising, that's what. I was out a LOT at various parties and general mooching about at the neighbours in the evenings. And no, I'm not implying people induce depression (wait, though, hang on...) - but all those convivial glasses of wine - and I didn't even get drunk - perhaps that's been working the same way? The depressant part of it is more noticeable now that my body isn't expecting to have to deal with rubbish anymore?
So tonight I have said a firm 'no' to the booze up next door and will be staying in with my virtuous spring water - yes, I realise I'm putting myself up for the award for dullest, most priggish, yawnfest of a smug bastard, but then I was with these people [I]last[/I] night, drinking for four hours. New book, mussels asparagus and cream for dinner, and an early night. Tomorrow I'll bounce again. Probably.
*lurks journal* I'll write a proper comment later when I get home from work, but I just wanted to say I enjoy your posts. I subscribed, and I look forward to reading more about your journey. =>
Well, I just had to take a look at a journal from someone named CheeseFiend. Cheese, while likely discovered by accident, is one of the most amazing reasons to like any livestock that produces yummy milk.
As someone who has named her journal Bitchapalooza, I have to admit that I like to indulge in the occasional kvetch. Not sure it it's chronic, but am sure it's mitigated with a twisted sense of humor and a skewed view of almost everything.
I like your journal a lot and will be stopping by regularly if you'll have me. Good luck on your journey!
The more the merrier. Hello, [B]Ghost[/B] and [B]Joanie[/B].
I imagine reading this is rather like watching someone shut in a cupboard and fumbling about in the dark. Is this the handle? No, it's a shoe. Is this the handle? No, it's an umbrella. And on and on and on... Is wine good for you? No...
Hang on, there's a rook taunting the chickens, back in a bit.
Hey Cheese, Ghost, Joanie, you sound like my kinda gals.....
Cheese, I get it, I have been primal for just under 60 days now and after the initial high of realisation I find I am not quite myself at present but don't understand why....
Weight loss (tick), exercise (tick), loving my food (double tick). I am the happiest most relaxed chilled individual you could meet on a dark stormy night so what's happening? Answers on a primal postcard pls
Excellent. Someone to write my journal for me, without my having to move my fingers. How did you know? Yes, that is exactly how I feel. It's all going right, nothing else obvious has gone terribly wrong, so what's with the meh-ness that's taken over?
Like I said, my new working theory is that it's the alcohol, so that's out of the window for at least a week [do I have a drinking problem, no, not me, a week is a loooooong time without a drink, surely, surely, surely]. I would say I felt a little better already today for an early, clean night, because I do, but I [I]also[/I] woke up with a swollen left eye and face. So working hypothesis number 2, to run in tandem with working hypothesis number 1 (the booze), is that I am imminently going to die of Terminal Bloat. [I]That's[/I] why I feel a bit rubbish - well you would, wouldn't you.
Have you anything left in your diet that's a bit off-limits still that could be causing it?
Hang on again, the cat's just brought something in. In bits.
I was just having the alcohol conversation with myself last night after consuming quite a few vodka sodas... >< Not that I have a drinking problem per se, I just... enjoy it :eek: But it's not primal. Hrrrm, conundrum. Must work on this. :beer: