I can feel my dinner coming back again...
I can feel my dinner coming back again...
I can feeeeel iiiittttt
Her placenta falls to the floor
The angel opens her eyes
The confusion sets in
Is that you playing the piano as well? Is there anything you can't do?!
Today I held you in mind and said a big and unexpected Fuck It to restricting. I have had two huge meals so far and just for today, I'm going to eat lots of good food, when I need it. Thank you for the courage.
[QUOTE=Derpamix;1179190]Her placenta falls to the floor
The angel opens her eyes
The confusion sets in[/QUOTE]
What's so disturbing is you didn't even make that up.
It's time for me to crash. You and your confusing placenta have a lovely evening.
[QUOTE=YogaBare;1178436]Thanks Zoe :) I want a work visa. I havent looked at the site ina while, but there's no visa that I'm really eligible for. It's rreally hard to get an American visa from what I know - I think to get a working visa you need to already have a job in place, and be sponsored by someone. But for a company to give you a job they need to prove that no one else in the country can do it (or something ridiculous like that).[/quote]
Yes, that is true. Mostly, like here in NZ, they have to demonstrate that there's no one else who can do the job, and that they posted enough advertising and looked into hiring a local. Work visas are hard to come by anywhere.
[quote]Ha - thank you for the invite! I would actually love to come to NZ and train with you - your yoga background is amazing. Where in NZ are you? What puts me off NZ is I have the impression that it's not super cosmopolitan. Weather and beaches are a must in my future living place, but I also need somewhere buzzing...[/quote]
Not all of NZ is rural, but it gets rural right quick. Auckland is a big city of 1mil people or something, but we live in wellington which is 250-300k people (in main part of the city) and I think it's 450-500k if you include the surrounds. There's always something happening in Wellington. :D
[quote]I actually did a series of Rolfing treatments a while back: found it quite amazing. I definitely agree that our body feeds our mentality. Interestingly, I was doing yoga the other day, and I suddenly slid really far into the straddle splits. It was out of no where - I went down about five inches more that I've ever gone before! Releasing stuff from the body? Maybe...[/QUOTE]
I really like rolfing/structural integration. it is cool stuff. I think there are only 3 rolfers in the country.
If you are under 30 (i don't know if you are) you can get a 2 yr work-holiday visa to come here. Then, your next mission is to fall in love with a kiwi to stay.
I don't know which is more disturbing... That I remind Derp of this guy:
Or that you guys all knew the song!!! Who the hell is this lightening dude? I had the song stuck in my head all day... Thanks a lot!!! :p
[QUOTE=PaleoMom;1178955]I did see that. I have been thinking a lot about how I go about my day lately. I've been relooking at Dr. Lam's info on adrenal fatigue and realizing that I was just in a false state of feeling better but that healing underneath was still happening. That is when he says to be really careful because any stressor can send a person back down to an even lower low that they had before. I'm literally not sure I could survive that! So, I've been thinking about stress and noticing how I tend to do things very tensely. Gardening, cleaning, cooking, grocery shopping - it doesn't matter how much of a non stress activity it should be, I find myself racing through it and tensing my body. This, shockingly, doesn't actually make the task get done faster, it only turns it from something that could be relaxing into something that is stressful and wears me out. I'm trying really hard to relax through out the day so that I'm not adding stress to every waking moment of my life when it doesn't have to be that way. Even since I had kids I feel like I'm in a mad panic to get things done as quickly as possible. All residual from the days of their babyhood when spare moments were few and I often had 10 minutes to get a days worth of work done.
Sorry I've been so quiet. I'm reading, but often don't have a clear enough head to formulate my thoughts into words. Overall I'm doing better though. I'm stopping exertion before I feel like I need to and religiously going to bed before 10pm. It is all really helping a lot :) I think I might have even lost a tiny bit of weight.[/QUOTE]
That's fantastic that you think you're losing! :) I think I am too, but my measuring tape has mysteriously vanished (subconsciously intentional?) so I'm not really checking. It's quite liberating! And I'm not looking in the mirror and hating the reflection, which is pretty astounding. I actually don't think I'm fat. Wow! :rolleyes:
That's good that you've read something which helped you. I think I'm like you in that my energy is the most debilitating thing about my life. But I always seem to focus on peripheral problems (weight etc.) instead of targeting the main issue. This new direction is quite liberating. Have you started to notice a pattern with your energy yet? I got a big insight today!
Oh, and please don't worry about being quiet! It's great to have your input whenever you feel like it :)
I appreciate you putting a link to your journal on my thread. I have read the entire thing and am quite fascinated at the outcome. As I read, I could hear my body saying yes! yes! yes! It is crazy the symptoms I have had. I haven't checked my temp yet, but I felt cold all the time, to the point that I wanted to move away because I just couldn't stand winter. I live in a fairly warm climate and our winters are pretty mild, but cold was just unbearable. I also never sweat when I exercise, although I am working very hard. I remember before I started dieting feeling hot all the time. Since my binging has gotten out of control and I have episodes 3-4x per week now and don't restrict or purge as much anymore, I have noticed that I am not as cold anymore. I, too, used to eat because I felt cold. I would also guzzle hot tea because I was freezing all the time, when others were warm.
I need to research more, but i did read the link you sent me from 180degreehealth. I related to a lot of it because there was a time about 10 years ago that I could eat whatever I wanted and I was the thinnest I had ever been. I never thought about food, and if I did notice that I was overeating for a day or 2, my appetite would naturally go down for a few days and I maintained my weight effortlessly. I desperately wish I could remember what I ate then, but I do recall eating deep fried chicken and biscuit for breakfast, but I have no idea what else I ate. Needless to say, that was before I cared what was healthy. Its crazy because food was of that little importance to me that I don't even remember what I ate. I can tell you pretty much everything I have eaten for 2+ years because it is journaled or whatever (except the binges). Whenever I ate whatever I wanted, I never gained weight until my second pregnancy when I started overeating for some reason. My ED developed after this when I forced off baby weight from vigorous diet and exercise. My binging started about a year ago and I have put 25+ lbs on my small frame. When I first started gaining, I remember weighing 127 lbs which was unacceptable, but considering I now weigh 147 from trying to lose those few pounds, I would give anything to have just been happy there. Funny prior to "healthy" eating, I easily maintained 115.
I am going to take the plunge and eat whatever food I want whenever I want, with exception of processed foods. I am hoping to stockpile some nutrients during this time. I do notice that I have fewer cravings when I am well fed. I am past the point of caring if I lose weight or not. Summer is here and I am not going to be in a bikini anyway, so who cares? I just want food to be food. Thank you for inspiring me.[/QUOTE]
Callison, I'm so so glad that you got something from teh journal! (I'm also pretty impressed that you got through all the waffle, ha! ;)) I'm delighted that you're going to try a new approach. My dad has been saying for my whole life that dieting makes you fat, and he's absolutely right.
Are you going to keep updating your journal? I've subscribed to it now and I'll defintitely pop in and cheer you along! I'm sure you'll make great progress. This way is slow and steady, but it's paved with self love <3
Btw, EVERY time I see your username, this song goes through my head: