Thank you. I was hoping someone would say that.
Nutrition is a deal breaker for me -- I'm very passionate about primal living. Seeing a SO constantly hurting themselves would be too difficult for me to deal with. If your mother died of cigarette-induced lung cancer, would you be ok with a chronic smoker? Of course not. You know the damage being done and it may simply be as simple as she does not.
If she's completely unwilling to even entertain the idea with an open mind.....then.....I'm sorry but I wouldn't be able to stick around. Harsh I know, but I don't like wasting my time.
Weird about ONE aspect of this...
Only been dating a few months... talking about changing the person, having kids, etc.
If you don't like the persons lifestyle so much within a few months that you are posting questions on a message board about how to change that person.
Move on and find someone you are more compatible with.
I agree that if it's an issue this early on it will only get worse. Move on. I'm sure there are a lot of women out there who are more compatible.
[QUOTE=RichMahogany;918559]+1 to the last 3 posts.[/QUOTE]
If you were married already, with children between you, my advice would be far different. I am an old married broad, with four kids, and I would move heaven and earth to find an equilibrium that is respectful if hubby were to suddenly get religion with some diet that puts a strain on the foodways in this house - like macrobiotics or something - because my relationships with them are more important than fighting about food (assuming all other pieces-parts of the relationship are in good working order, which mostly mine are).
Having said that though, I waited until MY "right" guy came along to marry because I just didn't want to fight, or have to swallow anger, or whateverthehell, on issues I really don't care to compromise on. If you are already worrying about the health of your hypothetical children, food has become a biggie for you, and you will do yourself and any future partner of yours a huge favor and face the fact that one of your filters for sorting females has become a paleo/primal diet.
And - I agree with RichMahogany.
Oh, and if you're concerned with the child-bearing aspect, do NOT read "Nutrition and Physical Degeneration" or you won't procreate with this woman.[/QUOTE]
Ahh yes... the book I wish I'd read 15+ years ago, and wish my parents had read... and wish my grandparents had read... Now I can only hope that my kids read it before they decide to procreate :D.
Anyhoo... as far as dating someone who doesn't seem to care about her health. I think, if you're happy with her, and you're planning a potential future with her... then just keep going the way you are. It is possible she'll come around when she doesn't feel pressured. I have to admit, there's nothing that makes me dig my heels in MORE than having someone tell me I should do something. I am very thankful my husband never got into primal before me... I'd probably still be a vegetarian :p (err just cause I HATE BEING TOLD WHAT I SHOULD DO).
That being said, I don't try and change him. I do try and influence the children positively, but I don't expect them to follow what I do 100% (I'd like it if they did... but I don't expect it). I hope to set the right example and have them kinda just take it in, you know?
This isn't to say I don't occasionally go on and on about particular aspects of nutrition. I do :D. Sometimes too much, I have to admit. But I don't really harp AT my family (except maybe my oldest son a bit, as he's extremely overweight and nothing so far has worked, so I really REALLY want him to get on board with this).
Yes, it's nice to be partnered to a person who has the same nutritional ideals as you do, but I don't think it's the be all and end all of a relationship.
[QUOTE=iniQuity;918256]The thing about women that took me forever to understand is that they deal with a lot more shit, from a hormones standpoint, than men do. It should have been obvious, knowing full well about menstrual periods and all. However, this extends beyond just that time of the month. Sometimes my girlfriend "feels" like she needs to eat something comforting for random reasons, and this almost always means some sort of cereal with skim milk. She claims it's bland enough and familiar enough, during those moments the last thing she cares about is nutrition.[/QUOTE]
I'm sorry but that is NOT a female thing. That's a food-addict thing. Big difference.
[QUOTE=Crabbcakes;918839]If you were married already, with children between you, my advice would be far different. I am an old married broad, with four kids, and I would move heaven and earth to find an equilibrium that is respectful [/QUOTE]
Yeah. Well-put. I have had to curtail my enthusiasm and compromise. Lots of high fat, red meat meals are simply out of the question. That is okay because the compromise is low fat, chicken and fish and steamed veggies which are just as primal as anything else and something I can eat with enjoyment (and butter.) No biggie there. And hey, the other day he made his favorite shrimp fajitas and ate it the way I do: in a bowl instead of in a tortilla. Maybe we were out of tortillas or maybe he wanted to try it my way. Not sure.