[QUOTE=canio6;1066569]Hugs CC :( (and one for Third too)[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=Urban Forager;1066608]My heart goes out to you and third.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=badgergirl;1066690]There are never the right words for these things, that is true, but there is the love you can show rather than say and I am sure that family will appreciate your support. I'm thinking of you and sending love to you and your family.[/QUOTE]
Thanks ladies - and gent. We just got back. The whole Crabbcakes clan went. I barely made it in the door of the funeral home before the waterworks started. We stayed a good while to be sure Third was processing stuff well, even flipping through all the photo albums the little girl's mom has brought along. Just as I thought I had it all together, Third's and Little Girl's preschool teacher from their special-needs school walked in, and it happened all over again. It was in this teacher's class that the two met, right after our move to OH.
Afterwards the six of us ambled down the block to the Depot (real train depot, now renovated into a cafe and bar) to process emotions over huge baskets of sweet potato fries. Since there was a high school cheerleading party in the main cafe, we commandeered almost all the chairs that belly up to the bar in the back. First swiped the tv remote, and since we were the only ones in the bar, she changed both TVs to HGTV. That carb load doesn't help the waistline, but it sure helped overall.
Now First and Second are on their way with hubby to church, where there is a teen Sunday School movie night going on. Theme - the afterlife. Movie - "What Dreams May Come", the Robin Williams flick. Gotta love the UU.
As someone who has been in that Mom's position, I can tell you that your showing up and letting her know that her daughter was loved and mattered means everything. Continue to contact her in the months to come either by phone or a card and let her know that her daughter will not be forgotten.
[QUOTE=Mud Flinger;1067257]As someone who has been in that Mom's position, I can tell you that your showing up and letting her know that her daughter was loved and mattered means everything. Continue to contact her in the months to come either by phone or a card and let her know that her daughter will not be forgotten.[/QUOTE]
Good grief, Mud Flinger, I am truly so sorry! But I will take your advice. It won't be hard, because we won't forget her.
Well, school for Third has been cancelled today due to icy road conditions. It was cancelled last week twice - on Wednesday for frigid temps, and Friday for an impending snowstorm that turned out to be just a few inches of snow. But that is okay - at this time in the winter, all we really want to do is hibernate a lot, punctuated by playing in the snow and perhaps the odd run into town to get victuals. And being a multiple-disabilities school and all, it means that Third is missing nothing. Well, I truthfully cannot say "nothing", but learning and progress for those kids is measured in extemely long time frames, so three days missing from something that could often almost be measured in geologic time spans doesn't rate.
I ate some Doritos a couple of days ago, and tooted for an entire evening. Second was really out of joint, hormone poisoning, I think (what the Parents Crabbcakes call those days when the girls are inexplicably emotional, crabby, unforgiving, harping teen Crabbettes), so hubby took her for a drive into town just for some daddy-daughter time, because heaven knows the rest of us weren't good company - she said so. The two of them came back very much more settled and balanced and happy, with a school dance's worth of chip bags - 9, I think.
Primal wonder of wonders - I actually pushed them all away after just a short while, as they just weren't the thing any more. This time last year I would have staked my claim to an entire bag of them, shoving my own progeny out of the way in the process. Progress!
This weekend we begin a weeklong stay at the Unschooler's conference. These crazies hold their conferences at a huge waterpark, and call the men's gathering "SSUDS"... the Secret Society of Unschooling Dads. And they hold their meetup right on the very first evening - in the resort bar. Honest. Hubby went last year and said nobody got drunk and they all had a pleasant guy-time shooting the breeze about whatever (this being an Unschooler event, you never know who will feel compelled to talk about what...).
The Kids Crabbcakes are ecstatic - this will be our third consecutive (and total) visit. Last year upon departure day we had such long faces and nearly open rebellion at the thought of leaving. But if Papa doesn't pay for more time, they do eventually throw you out, and faced with this reality, the Crabblettes relented and got into the van for the trip home. Albeit with wet heads - they threw themselves back into the waterpark after hotel room checkout because rules allow you into the waterpark later than checkout time and they were not going to let one minute go unused.
Also at this time last year, I was a number of belt holes bigger around the waist, so yay for Primal there! I didn't go into the water much because I was too self-conscious about my fleshy figure, in a one-piece suit, even. Still will wear the uni, but might just consider getting wet more this year.
So, journal, until the next!
Well done on knowing your limits and stopping quickly. Very useful life skills and I am envious!
Odds and Ends Time...
I think you all should applaud me. I walked 2 miles with First and Fourth today in this unseasonably warm day - and loved every minute!
Here is very close to where my family originates... [url=http://members.shaw.ca/lingelbach/BurgHerzberg.html]Lingelbach Heritage - Burg Herzberg[/url] In fact the former gen Baron (seriously) gave my grandparents the original lease on their land. Now our family owns it, btw.
Third started her very first monthly you-know-what yesterday afternoon. After being petrified for years of this moment (ever consider how you would teach this to a disabled and cognitively challenged kid??) it is going PERFECTLY. Yeah, I am doing all of the care, but no terror or fainting or resistance to the "supplies" or anything - what did I do to deserve this bit of grace...
[QUOTE=Crabbcakes;1077511]After being petrified for years of this moment (ever consider how you would teach this to a disabled and cognitively challenged kid??) it is going PERFECTLY. Yeah, I am doing all of the care, but no terror or fainting or resistance to the "supplies" or anything - what did I do to deserve this bit of grace...[/QUOTE]
Yes. But only recently when I had to edit an article on that very topic written by a gynae who specialises in helping families decide on contraceptive/hormonal treatment for their disabled daughters. I can PM you the link if you're interested (though it sounds like you've got it covered).
Of course this went well. You are an awesome Mom! I think we often forget how much we influence how our kids deal with things. While control is a fantasy, influence is not.
[QUOTE=Mud Flinger;1077755]Of course this went well. You are an awesome Mom! I think we often forget how much we influence how our kids deal with things. While control is a fantasy, influence is not.[/QUOTE]
What she said! :)
Okay CC finally found your journal. I am up to page 3..... I have a ways to go !!!!! :)