Today was weird, I felt hungry, really actually hungry all day. Non stop.
I had a 12 ounce BP coffee at 7 30. 2 tbsp of butter.
I had 4 eggs and bacon for breakfast at 10.
I had a huge mixed salad with a half a pork loin stuffed with Brochetta at 12 noon.
I had a half handful of walnuts and a big glass of water at 4 pm.
then another big ass salad with a grilled turkey breast shared with my wife at 9 pm.
I am still hungry, ravenous even. It is 11 pm as I write and I am snacking on a sandwich of Romain lettuce, wrapped around onions and red peppers with some home made hummus.
What the hell, this is the first day in a month I have felt hungry and I am going to have to go to bed hungry.
My salad dressing is evoo, the pork loin was fried in bacon grease, the turkey breast was marinated in the rest of the bacon fat from this morning so fat is not the issue.
I seem to have come down with hollow leg syndrome.
Tried the Portobello mushroom caps as hamburger buns tonight. bleah phooey.
On a bright note my pants are falling down, may have to go shopping. Soon.
yesterday I took my son to go see the Avengers, it was great. After the movie, I took him out for pizza, cheap pizza sold by the slice. We loves cheap pizza, I dont know why but we always loved it. I have never been so disappointed in my life with Pizza, it was terrible in a way pizza never was before. Pizza should not taste that way, rancid even. My son did not taste anything wrong so it was me.
I cant believe i am going to be cheated pizza. Life is just so unfair.
saw the doc today, I am at 319 lbs and 150/82 BP. I think I may have been misled by inaccurate scales. No 2 I try have been even within 20 lbs of each other. So I am going to base my weight loss on the docs scale. I dont now even know where I was to start, might have been 350 might have been 360. I dont know. Oh well, I am now down to a size 48 pants and they are getting loose.
I was a size 52 in January.
To celebrate last night my bp and weight losses I decided to go completely off the reservation and had a Snicker's bar. I thought whats the best way to reaffirm my commitment to eating this way. I feel great normally and sometimes it is easy to forget why you avoid something..... found out today. Ohh man.
It tasted great, really sweet which was not a surprise but not unpleasant, all in all still my favorite candy bar. However..
All I am going to say is High pressure jets of unhappiness. all day.
So I can assuredly state that snickers bars are not for me. ick.
Go Ahead, laugh at me.
Today is my first planned Fast. I figured a month is long enough to get settled and start fasting so yeah. Tonight I will be having BBQ chicken and Veggies so I can look forward to it. It is 10 am, I have not eaten since last night at 7 pm.
Here we go.
I am not worried about being hungry, I am worried because my sensations of hungry or not are so out of kilter compared to what I used to experience. I used to be hungry all the time, I used to crave food and have no real will power in the face of it.
Now I dont know if I am hungry, I dont think so but I cant always tell. I am used to being conscious of food all the time all around me, I work in a food company after all and now I cant tell if I am hungry or if I am just enjoying my gall stones.
I dont feel the jitters, I dont get the great empty whole where my belly was. I feel sort of rumbly sometimes but nothing I cant ignore as my energy levels are mostly constant. I have ignored it all day just to see and it does not get worse, How do I know when I am hungry?
What I crave is the sensation of eating, of flavour in my mouth, of texture. This is what I crave, not hunger.[/QUOTE]
I noticed exactly the same thing. Primal hunger is more like a stomach rumbling to me that comes and goes. Before, my hunger was more "head hunger." Whatever -- I'm grateful to PB for "evening things out."
Good luck in your journey. You're a great writer!
Heya Chatty, I am glad you enjoy my writing, I will try to keep up the standard. As for my first official fast, I had the horrible grumblies and the desire to eat but I got out and I meandered around. I discovered I cant run Diablo 3 on my computer and bought some 2xl t shirts cheep.
7 PM came and I made most of a whole bbq chicken vanish in the blink of yer eye.;)
It's sad/exciting when old food loves are now gone from our lives, when I eat bread i gain 5 pounds overnight, literally and wake a giant b*tch, and everything makes me angry. I have not done a whole 30, so my body still is ok with some sugar. I use raw honey a couple times a week in cooking.
I don't look at bread and say i need that or really want it anymore, but today there was cake and it was a battle. BUt I won not the cake. I just kept reminding myself how I feel after cake and i avoided looking at it.
Keep up the good work!
Sounds like you are doing great Warmbear! Like CanadianGirl said about food loves, it is rough because here you have your mind seeing the things that made us happy and sated and if we choose to indulge itreally doesn't seem worth it with the after effects. Your body is telling you oh nay nay!!! Ah well slowly but surely we all get there. Keep up the great work, looking forward to many more a posting from you :)