holds her.. ears? that.. could hurt
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holds her.. ears? that.. could hurt
Yeah, I had to read that one twice. Her ears??? Maybe it's a fetish.
[QUOTE=bloodorchid;1084778]holds her.. ears? [/QUOTE]
Makes it easier to steer!
lol
And then I Googled ear fetish.
Dear . . . Valhalla. One man gets an umbrella handle just from typing the word EARS. A woman complains that her boyfriend keeps jamming his tongue in her ear while they sin, like he's supplying a wax wash.
* retreating back to book and Evanescence for the day *
poor panda
i love that you called his excitement an umbrella handle tho ;)
To commemorate this learning experience, I plan to incorporate [I]ears[/I] and [I]umbrella handles[/I] into this chapter I'm writing. Only we will understand the significance.
I think I lost another of my 50 Shades this morning, at least vicariously.
He [I]tried [/I] to pee but [I]couldn't[/I]... :confused:
I think that it is safe to say that somewhere in that story he contracted an STD. :eek:
I have a term for really bad erotica, written so poorly that you can't tell which end is up on either partner: Picasso Sex. There was a lovely example of this months ago in a book called Vagina Insanity, a sample of which one can view on Amazon. Of course, I would never encourage you to do such a thing, especially those of you on work computers.
But Gay Panda is not on a work computer.
Here are some real gems from this book:
1) "her bosom bumping out of her brassiere"
2) the smoothly enigmatic shape of the contents of her bra "spurred my phenomena"
3) our hero is such a contortionist that he manages to kiss her G spot. From behind. While she is wearing jeans.
Anyway, it's a delightful read for those who need an example of Picasso Sex. (I suspect it was written in another language and shot through a translator.)
I tried to read it out loud to Lady Friend, but she yelled and ran away.