Never really thought about it before, but you are right. Navigating the world is a mental effort when you are big and in pain much of the time. Enjoy each new aspect of the new you - and have fun acting like a kid. I'm waiting now to hear about the day you decide to play on the playground like the kids do (hopefully without the mental health professionals being called as what adult in their right mind would DO such a thing)!
[QUOTE=Mud Flinger;956263]Never really thought about it before, but you are right. Navigating the world is a mental effort when you are big and in pain much of the time. Enjoy each new aspect of the new you - and have fun acting like a kid. I'm waiting now to hear about the day you decide to play on the playground like the kids do (hopefully without the mental health professionals being called as what adult in their right mind would DO such a thing)![/QUOTE]
Ha the last time i was around a mental health professional he asked me where i practices and where i graduated from... my real fear from an encounter with them is that i would probably be too disdainful now and make them all pissy... most of them are still children themselves
Many are First Timers. The more times you go through life, the more you realize that the human brain cannot be generalized into categories of people and "cures" vary from person to person. On the other hand, many good doctors have been through enough lives to know that they don't know everything.
There is a disturbance in the force.
something... shrouded in mystery stirs nearby. as if Odin walked past my back.
what would the all father have with me?
Things have been going strange here as well.
I feel sexy. Now i dont LGN to myself so dont get the wrong idea. i THINK 318 is a far cry from sexy especially with all the excess skin i am currently blessed with. notwithstanding the forgoing, I FEEL SEXY.
I feel like showing off. My new dockers ( I never thought i could buy dockers) make me want people to look at my ass. it is kinda funny.
i have hip bones. who wuda thunk it. oh they are under the belly roll but they are there. my ankles kill me when i cross my legs now. my shoulders are freaking awesome, i love to look at my clavicles. My hands are better than ever. and my ass is positively boney.
it occurs to me that without all this extra skin i am probably way below 318. Not that I can do much other than start super sulphuring myself to move it along but still in some respects i may have met my goal. i am nowhere near ready to start back with the iron and perhaps it would be the wrong decision to ever lift again. but that is a decision that is at least a year away. Still being able to occasionally do 10 pushups is better than i have ever done. during this entire process my mobility has changed. It never made any sense to me how i could bench 450 but not do 10 pushups. now i am fairly certain that much like my legs and my increasing ability to find the lotus position, stuff was in the way. I continue to be fascinated by the obvious truth that i was born with some sort of adipose disorder which restricted certain ranges of motion.Right now all i can think is that i had some sort of fatty joints or perhaps they were permanently inflamed. Who knows. it is entirely possible that it was in reaction to the chronic physical abuse. As i was not participating in a double blind clinical study i wont ever know the entire truth and to be honest i had never given any thought to physical limitations as being just that, i always assumed that my mind had the ability to exercise perfect control of my body and i just lacked something to make it happen
synergy, partnership, give and take. the body mind connection is too real in my life for me to ever ignore anymore.
In other news.
The girl is going thru "detox" it is such a normal part of our life that we normally giggle about it. however this one is pretty bad. She is constantly burping up stuff we didnt eat. Last night it was school pizza. this morning it is burritoes and spam.
I am convinced that the body can hold onto shit for as long as it needs to, just as i am convinced that there is a time limit to elimination. if you cant get it out of your body within 24 hours it gets stored somewhere.
Normally we would just up the magnesium and vitamin C and D and roll with it. but this one has hit her pretty hard. I wish i knew how to accelerate the process, however the reality is that this probably IS the accelerated process. I do not know how to make the body release shit faster than it is currently. she is taking the hot bath, and after the ice bath she took this morning... ( as an aside, i am not certain that didnt increase her distress as she first shrank and then dialated her cappilaries... probably sped it up faster than anything i woudl have thought of) but since this is only in the blood stream and lymph system and not in the digestion it isnt like she can do a salt flush and push anything out.
I have suggested activated charcoal, but she is probably correct that it isnt currently in the digestive track so that wont help.
just have to wait it out i suppose.
our pasts are different (obviously) she was fed poor quality SAD food while i always had better quality food just not as often as i needed as my mother would only let us eat when she decided we were hungry, which was when she was hungry, which was never. if it wasnt for dad we probably would have never eaten. the one thing he would get furious with her about was if dinner was not on the table for him, he figured he worked 20 hours a day she did nothing. the least she could do is make certain he had food... of course he eventually gave up on that notion, but i was a teen by that time.
so all that means that my releases are much more emotional while hers are much more physical..
it hurts to watch but i am glad it is happening, better out than in i always say.
This is fascinating reading, Quelsen! *feels Spockian* I'd be glad to look at your boney ass (IN your Dockers, of course!) ;)
I have a friend who lost over a hundred pounds; eventually he had to have the excess skin surgically removed, after he'd added the muscle he wanted and when the doctors determined there was no more "shrink" left.