I want to leave the weird alone for now, else i woudl run to my naturopath and consult my crystal pendulum :-)
Ok so P3 was 3 weeks ago. At that time i was having a hard time restarting eating. I forget that i have to eat a really large volume of food for my appetite to come back online. i finally just ate and that came back fine. going great for 15 days or so then on Friday last i was up 5 pounds. Nothing was added over the normal stuff exept on wednesday i had .75 lbs of green beans with in my goat stew.
Friday evening i decided i needed a break and went to nashville. I packed 3 pounds of hamburger, some nuts and cashews, onion butter cheese. I ate all of it but one pound of ground beef but the time i came back, but on the drive back home i got peckish and picked up 6 oz of cashews and a bag of pork rinds on the way back. ( 4 hours trip)
Sunday i was up an additional 2 pounds. then it all went away.... yea from sunday at 6 am to sunday at 10 am i went from 358 to 353.. So i am assuming it was all water and waste.
Monday i was up to 358 again WTF? so i did a steak day ( intermittent fast) and didnt eat until 7 pm
Yesterday i was down to 354 and figured i had it licked, today I am up again to 358,
My last dosage weight was 353. ( 352.8 ) and i held it eating what i am still eating ( more or less) for 15 days or so ( remember i am a guy and i can eat the same stuff every day and not get bored)
What IS different. I started working outside my home. I chose to stand at my desk everyday until i was strong enough to manage that. then i started sneaking lunges and squats in and then started taking walking up the stairs in the building 7 flights in all. I know i am way stronger than i was 3 weeks ago, however as much as i would like to say it is just additional muscle, i am not buying it.
Perhaps water retention? so i took a bunch of Concentrace which i have not normally needed to do since round 3.
What is in my lunch pail today? 2 mug muffins; 1.5 oz white cheddar aged 2 years; 10 oz of flank steak; 150g blueberries; 3 liters of iced tea.
What i expect to eat when i get home. some braised ox tail with onions or maybe some salmon which i have thawing.
honestly i hate when the scale goes up but it always has by a small margin. My inches are the same, in fact my pants felt extremely loose today. Yet I DONT LIKE SEEING THE SCALE MORE UPWARDS !
My name is Metta and I am a scale-o-holic. And my weight fluctuates a lot like yours, too. And, like you, because I'm making a lot of progress with fitness stuff, I think I'm gaining muscle.
I've been a lot better lately. A few things have changed. I quit recording my weight every day. I was using one of those LilySlim trackers. I decided to record only once a week. I still weigh myself daily, but it has less "charge" and I can't tell you - down to the ounce - what my exact weight is day to day. I used to be able to recite it for the past ten days. I also changed my goals so that it's not a weight-dependent thing. And when I sense my clothes feel different, instead of running to the scale to see if that means there's been another ounce lost, I just relish the moment. Okay, I tend to relish for a good bit of the day, frankly.
I don't think there's a cure for scale-a-holism, but you can help the symptoms.
Enjoying this journal, although disappointed that you haven't been galavanting through the wild just catching snakes for a protein boost.
I totally get the scales thing though, that's why I only let myself weigh and measure once a week. It can be so tempting to jump on, but the disappointment if you've gained or stayed the same can derail you. If you gain weight but your clothes fit better just go for it being muscle!!
I do weigh every day but I have a rule with myself that no weight loss or gain is "real" until it had been there for three days straight. Keeps me from getting all caught up in something like a transitory water weight fluctuation. I think if you only weigh once a week, it could actually make it worse because, if that one day happened to be a way up or way down day, that could give you the wrong impression about the whole week. If you have more data points it is easier to spot the outlier.
I think it is possible to want something too much.
To want something to such and extreme that you cannot recognize it when it is with the sphere of your grasp.
To hold on to your image of the desire that you cannot see its true form.
I have known for a while that the archer must nock and sight the arrow on the target, draw the bow, take a deep breath; the Release..... In order for the target to be hit.
I was listening to Bob Seger's Like a Rock this morning ( possibly the first time i have really truly listened to it) and it came to me that while i have not been particularly willing to admit my strenght and greatness due to my external appearance it was nonetheless there.
At 10 i decided i was fat; I used to say i noticed i was fat, however i now realize that it was a choixe not an objective observation. the truth was i was a grown man at 10; i was 5'8" and 125 pounds. yet being 10 surrounded by fat family ( that IS an objective opinion) i chose to tell myself i was fat.
I began to pursue "thinness" with all the energy of youth assuming that i could starve it off, run it off, weight lift it off. Cycle it off.
to no avail...
Of course the information was not out there then right..... Wrong. HCG was given a thumbs up in 1973 in America, and the Ketosis Diet is 90 years old. Yes conventional wisdom prevails until you let go of all that silliness and i was a product of my time. Yet.
When you release your desire, become unattached to the outcome; this i have seen time and time again is what brings the result. not worrying it to death.
For my own part i have been guilty of a failure to release to actually let go physically of a desire or need. However i have also been guilty of quantum entanglement where my thoughts continue to guide an action even when i am not phyically there. My obsession with solving everything myself without outside help has forced me to learn so much about everything i want to accomplish that it is as if i were never leaving school always trying to learn what others have already mastered and are willing to provide me.
I like to think i am better, however I acknowledge this to be my basic nature and as such all i can do it be aware of it and pry my cold dead hands off of stuff i really really want.
That's some Primal Dharma there, Q. Nice.
My 12 yr old daughter is starting this with me next week. I haven't gotten the entire family primal yet just because I've wanted them to see the changes in me first. My daughter told me she wants to start this as she is probably 30-50 lbs overweight and wants to get into better shape for cheerleading. She got on the scale and saw that her weight was at 160 lbs. I told her to give me the scale and I took it out to the shed. I've hid it from her. I haven't been on the scale in almost 3 months and I'm actually doing better with this by not focusing on the scale. I told her we just need to know her weight for a starting point and we'll go from there. I told her numbers are not important, the only that is important is how she feels about herself.
[QUOTE=geostump;464684]My 12 yr old daughter is starting this with me next week. I haven't gotten the entire family primal yet just because I've wanted them to see the changes in me first. My daughter told me she wants to start this as she is probably 30-50 lbs overweight and wants to get into better shape for cheerleading. She got on the scale and saw that her weight was at 160 lbs. I told her to give me the scale and I took it out to the shed. I've hid it from her. I haven't been on the scale in almost 3 months and I'm actually doing better with this by not focusing on the scale. I told her we just need to know her weight for a starting point and we'll go from there. I told her numbers are not important, the only that is important is how she feels about herself.[/QUOTE]
So true. Had i focused on MY feeling rather than the feelings of other so long ago i might be sane today.
but then again .....
[QUOTE=quelsen;464768]So true. Had i focused on MY feeling rather than the feelings of other so long ago i might be sane today.
but then again .....[/QUOTE]
You're so smart, quelsen. I follow your posts and soak this stuff up.