Zoebird - I loooove me some deviled eggs, but I'd go through all the effort of making them and then only want one or two, it took me forever to figure out that deviled egg salad was the same thing, half the work, and a mighty, mighty good breakfast!
Thanks kindly, Batty!
So today was a more or less successful rest day. I did have to do some heavy lifting at work, carting around some sheetrock, but ain't no big deal. I felt that delicious kind of soreness where you can stretch into the pain and take satisfaction in your hard work. I kept arching my back and feeling my sore tummy and thinking, abs, abs, abs, I'm gonna have abs!
Sidenote, I love my job. I'm an assistant for an artist, sorry, an Artist, I'm a lowercase artist, who shows his work in galleries round the world and gets the kind of money for it that boggles my mind. He's an awesome dude and he pays me to make art all day, so it doesn't get much better than that. Sometimes I'm hunched over a piece painting tiny detail for weeks at a time, sometimes I'm lugging stuff around, lifting, carting, moving, smashing, all sorts of art goes on, and often I just don't know what to expect when I head in to work. But as mentioned, he's awesome and didn't make fun of me too hard for whimpering pathetically when we hefted the first panel of sheetrock up. There are also two other people in the studio, his best friend and studio manager, and a rotating fourth member, sometimes it's one of their little brothers (family being great for cheap labor), sometimes another assistant.
Tomorrow is going to be a fasting day. I ate three meals today and it felt like a ridiculously large amount of food, I honestly prefer fasting days. It's strange that eating and resting has become something I have to enforce with myself, but I want to kick my ass, not my adrenals!
Tomorrow is also a work out day. In the comments of this article the trained posted a routine that is supposed to help women (who he claims often have "energy leaks" at the spine that detract from things like good pushups) strengthen their core/back. I thought that was interesting and I may give it a try. It's here: [url]http://bretcontreras.com/2010/10/training-women/#comment-2140[/url] if anyone is interested. I definitely struggle with keeping that core tightness during pushups, or even planks, or even, uh, anything really. I just wish there was a real gym in my area, I'd love to go in for some proper heavy lifting, but the only thing around is a Planet Fitness. The bf and I visited and it was a wasteland of machines, no barbells, bored counter people, and Pizza and Bagel days! Oh goody! ... ಠ_ಠ
But, speaking of heavy lifting! I just started watching the Spartacus: Blood and Sand prequel, Gods of The Arena, and aside from the ridiculously hot men, I enjoy watching them (the ridiculously hot men, in negligible amounts of pants) lifting beams as their work out, nice and simple. We have the trunk of our christmas tree sitting around, drying out so we can use it for firewood, but after chopping the branches off we got too lazy to chop it into logs. Maybe I just need to toss that around (while thinking about ridiculously hot men) for a while. I'm sure there are other things I can bend to such a purpose too, DIY or die!
All this getting fit and feeling good is hell on my libido, btw. It's always been almost unbearably high, but this is whole new levels of annoying. And the new guy at work, a friend of the artist, who is the fourth person for a while, is ridiculously cute and keeps doing things like showing me his motorcycle scars, or pulling up his shirt to show me his tattoos. Dude. That is dirty pool! Bad form! Stupid sexy Flanders! I have to keep reminding myself that I have my wonderful, awesome, loving boyfriend at home... who will be exhausted from work by the time I get home and be glued to the xbox... Man, I can not wait til he goes primal and can keep up with me!
In the meanwhile, back to the gladiators. Mmmm.
Sidenote, I love my job. I'm an assistant for an artist, sorry, an Artist, I'm a lowercase artist, who shows his work in galleries round the world and gets the kind of money for it that boggles my mind. He's an awesome dude and he pays me to make art all day, so it doesn't get much better than that. Sometimes I'm hunched over a piece painting tiny detail for weeks at a time, sometimes I'm lugging stuff around, lifting, carting, moving, smashing, all sorts of art goes on, and often I just don't know what to expect when I head in to work. [/QUOTE]
Ha, envy! I've known Artists like that (and had the chance to study under two such people). The entire time I kept thinking, PLEASE MARRY ME TO YOUR SON/BROTHER KTHNXS 'cause even bearing the family name increased your chance of success ten fold. Ahem.
Man muscle = good. It is why I attend certain "sporting" events these days <_<
Unsuperb - That's awesome that you've gotten to do that! Yeah, the nepotism of the art world is no surprise, but it's pretty overwhelming. I'm wondering what's going to happen when I try to put a show together. I have his support, but I'm a low brow art kinda girl, tattoos, pin ups, monsters, and he's in those loftier realms. Maybe he can help me put together a really great press release the explains that my love of painting nekkid rock'n'roll ladies is all a metaphor for the blah blah blah. Heh. And much to my boyfriend's dismay, I've become a huge UFC fan. He thought it was great at first, but last time he tried to put together a dude night of poker and UFC, most of his boys flaked out on him and he had to watch it surrounded by my girl friends. There was a lot of hootin and hollerin, especially as Forrest Griffin was fighting and he is a paleo hottie. The boy grumbled a bit over that one.
Ohh, morning work out means my fingers don't wanna work so good, but it's all worth it. I'm feeling refreshed. Still trying to figure out a couple of things. I want to sprint, but sprinting on icy sidewalks probably falls under the primal law for Don't Do Dumb Shit. What else can I do that will serve the purpose until we get a real thaw around here?
Also, I ate a couple spoonfuls of coconut cream to take my vitamins with, pills on an empty stomach is bluergh, but I wonder if that effects the fast. I should probably just be googling these things, but I'm off to work.
So, I kinda obliterated myself via workout on Tuesday morning, ouch! My arms have been aching, not so much in the sore muscle way, more just them telling me, "You're doing it wrong!" So, I'm gonna listen to my body and lay off a bit. Before that, however, I finally managed girly, knee, pushups, which I hadn't been able to do at all, so I'm still getting stronger, but maybe I should push less and work on form more. Yeah, that's my plan. Also, buying a big ol flex band, because I think it was the jump up negatives I was doing on the pull up bar that really screwed me up, and threads I've been reading have repeatedly mentioned that the bands are a better way to train yourself for real pull ups.
I meant to just do a lower body workout yesterday, and then today, but my work schedule is a little wonky at the moment and finding the time AND energy has been a bitch. Alas. Soon, soon, there will be a glute reckoning!
Something I'm pretty excited about, strangely enough, is that I'm feeling a bit pms'y. After a horrible debacle with a Mirena IUD, and about 10 years of being on hormonal birth control before that to help regulate a chaotic cycle, and you know, the whole no baby thing, my body was unhappy. REALLY unhappy. It took me almost a year to get a period after having the IUD out. Then many months for the second, then a couple months for the third... Then things have taken their course about every 45-50 days, which I'm thankful is at least semi regular. however, if I'm pms'y now, that would mean I'm starting to come round to a 28 day cycle, and as much as I've spent years resenting everything about being female, I'm so ready to be truly healthy and have my body really start to heal. Oh, and there's that biological clock that suddenly started ticking like a time bomb, heh, it'd be good to know that I can conceive in the near future.
And on the food front, I ate the whole couple ounces of coconut cream I bought in 4 days. That stuff is pure crack. And I'm thinking about making it even more cracklike by making Halvah with it. I found the texture to be close already, and it always made me sad that I couldn't find halvah without hydrogenated foulness in it, so next time I go grocery shopping I'm going to grab some tahini and more coconut crack, er, cream and give it a try. Definitely going to post the results.
And on the food front, I ate the whole couple ounces of coconut cream I bought in 4 days. That stuff is pure crack. And I'm thinking about making it even more cracklike by making Halvah with it. I found the texture to be close already, and it always made me sad that I couldn't find halvah without hydrogenated foulness in it, so next time I go grocery shopping I'm going to grab some tahini and more coconut crack, er, cream and give it a try. Definitely going to post the results.[/QUOTE]
That sounds like it will be amazing! Love me some halvah, mmm
Victories and a wee little bitty bit of set back!
Man, I really do mean to update this thing regularly, but life has been a madhouse.
First, For The Win!
In spite of all of the crap over the last couple of weeks, I'm finally below 185 (184-183, my scale is crappy), waist 30.5, hips 45.5, body fat 35.3.. Slow, but steady and measurable, gives hope! Now that I think to measure, I've lost about a half inch off everything else as well, including my chest under my boobs, but.. my breasts seem to be growing? Huh. Uh, no complaints there. :D
Most importantly, the PMS mentioned above was spot on, I got my period on Tuesday the 1st, which would make it 28 days after the last time, EXACTLY. I've never been so happy to be bleeding from the lady parts (well, except that one time, where it was more of a relief...)! 28 days is AWESOME. Normalizing hormones makes me really, really happy. Here's hoping that it happens again this month.
I got my giant, ACME sized rubber bands and have been doing assisted pull ups, feeling like almost kinda sorta a bad ass, with much less pain and much better form than the jumping up and reversing down.
Now, the ugly (I'm skipping the bad, no value judgments on my life right now).
On Friday the 25th I had a small breakage of Primal Law #8. Walking to the bus stop, crossing the street, glance down at my feet, oh hey, my shoelace is untied, better not tr-AAaagh! So, I ate wet, dirty pavement and shredded my palms and one knee. Actually, bruised that knee so deeply that two weeks later, after even all the scabs have gone, the knee still has purple blotches and hurts like a bitch if I kneel. So, exercising has been right out.
And then there was a problem with Avoid Poisonous Things, as I've been glutened multiple times in the last couple weeks, both by eating outside the house and by my useless jerk roommates who can't be bothered to wipe a sponge over the counter after they've liberally sprinkled it with flour and bread crumbs. I am, quite literally, sick with desire to have an apartment that's safe for me. Or, you know, to sprinkle rat poison all over the kitchen and tell them, hey, it's not a big deal, it's only a little, it won't [i]kill[/i] you. So, guts are still in recovery mode until I can stop getting glutened, and that makes everything else harder. The glutening also brings up the fibromyalgia and joint pain, and the exhaustion, and the sleeping for 10 hours at a go, but I'm getting through it.
And then, there was some failure to use my brain. I kicked caffeine (my daily cuppa tea) two weeks ago, using a convenient (?!) hangover, figuring if I was gonna feel like shit for a day, might as well go whole hog. That was a good thing. Yesterday afternoon, after eating only a small breakfast at 9am, I decided that a cup of coffee would be okay and help motivate me for all the spring cleaning I've been doing. There's only instant coffee in the house. Yech. Oh well, I'll give it a try. Hmm, a heaping tablespoon per 6oz of hot water, ey? Well, I've got a big cup and a teaspoon, so I'll just put two REALLY heaping teaspoons in here, give it a stir, no problemo.
Half an hour later I am vibrating right out of my skin and really feeling for all the world like I've plowed through some particularly nasty cocaine. I am 1) a VERY cheap date & 2)Not a fan of feeling like I'm on drugs, having done quite enough to figure that out, thankyewverymuch. Well, I got a lot of spring cleaning done, but couldn't eat anything, couldn't sit still, couldn't control muscle twitching and spasming, had a bit of the ol' typewriter jaw going on (Seriously! From fucking coffee!!!), and generally felt like hell. Then, I tried to go to bed. The least bit of light was an amazing amount of distraction, so I put on a sleep mask and tried to just meditate, with varying degrees of success. I spent all night drifting in and out of being fully awake and lightly asleep, having crazy, insomniac dreams that I was Tyler Durden. WTF, brain? No more coffee for you! I don't want to wake up and find out that I've started a fight club and am plotting to overthr- ..Oh, wait, that would actually be completely awesome! Still, ugh, no more coffee. My boyfriend, meanwhile, was having zombie apocalypse dreams in which we were kicking undead ass. I love him so much.
I have two weeks off of work while my boss globetrots to install gallery shows, so it's spring cleaning time! And then working on my own art needs to happen. And some "Before" pictures. Maybe I'll get the boyfriend to help me take some this afternoon. Ah, and getting my bike ready to roll, now that spring has sprung.
All the ugly aside, life is pretty good right now, and I'm feeling like it only gets better. Especially when we move into our own place in June and my kitchen is entirely gluten free. Grr.
I swear! Every weekend I have to relearn the same lesson: Eating like crap, living like crap, makes me feel like crap! Weekends are difficult because there is so much social obligation to live up to. Friends, and especially my boyfriend, will still buy me a drink even if I don't want it. And since I haven't felt like drinking much at all lately, there's been quite a lot of me quietly abandoning a 6 dollar vodka soda at the end of the bar. Buying rounds is a gesture of camaraderie, and I appreciate it, and it gets fuckin' costly in Manhattan, but I love my friends and I have a great time even when sober, sometimes especially when sober, and I like being more coherent at the end of the night so I can keep an eye out, make sure everyone is getting home safe and such.
That being said, I wasn't all that lax in my lifestyle principles this weekend, and getting drunk at shows makes getting hit in the face by huge sweaty punks flailing around the pit MUCH more tolerable. And staying in the front of the crowd at a show is still my favorite full body work out. We saw Against Me! and Dropkick Murphys on Friday, and Dropkick has some of the biggest, meatiest, angriest frat types I've ever seen at punk shows, so getting into shoving matches with that crowd is pretty epic. If I could afford to go to a show twice a week, I'd be fit like nobody's business!
I also had a few mimosas with brunch the next day and a couple glasses of wine with dinner. The mindset starts going, in for a penny, in for a pound. That's a mental habit to break, to be sure.
Ah well, this weekend is behind me, next weekend and it's various bad decisions is ahead, and right now I'm pretty alright.
My boyfriend joined a local gym with me, it's similar to Planet Fitness, lofi, no extras, no classes, but it has barbells (unlike the local PF we checked out) and no freakin' Pizza Nights and Bagel Days. I think I'm going to do Starting Strength a couple of days a week, and use their stationary bikes for some HIIT. I think the boy will respond best to this, since he finally seems really interested in getting fit (I think he's also tired of me and my girl friends yammering on about it, "Well, if all these girls are doing it..."). It's more accessible and seems more "proper" to someone with very conventional ideas about fitness. I had to dissuade him of a LOT of Broscience over the years. We'll work on things like grok crawling and sledgehammers when he's already feeling strong and happy from building muscle.
Ahh, I can't wait to start lifting. I've been enjoying bodyweight exercises, but I think I subconsciously push myself harder when doing weight training, and it feels gooooood.
This can all be such a struggle sometimes. I've been having a bad case of exploding face, and I can't tell if it's a cold or allergies, we've some bad mold problems in our house and I've reacted to them before. Either way, man, I get CRANKY when I'm sick. I'm just feeling all sorts of stress right now, and it's not doing anything positive for me. In fact, I've bounced up a couple of pounds and a half an inch all over, without changing anything. Thanks, body. You jerk! If magically perfect conditions are required for me to actually lose fat, I fear I may be doomed forever. It's not a comforting thought. I broke down and cried in the car on the way home from the gym with my boyfriend. It all came tumbling out, fear of not being able to have a healthy body, not being able to feel comfortable and attractive in my own skin, never being able to find and heal all of my weird health problems because I'm too poor for doctors, fear of never healing all these hormone imbalances and not being able to have children, or not being able to have the energy to care for and be a good example for them. Just, fear. And he listened to me, and kissed me, and told me that things would be okay, and I trust his word, because that's what I need to do.
Ah, yes, so, bad day, yesterday. Better day today. It's beautiful out, I'm riding my bike up to the art studio I work at, don't know if I mentioned, my boss is out of town setting up gallery shows in London and Israel, so I have a few weeks off and am broke as hell. Anyway, going to grab my paints from the studio and actually get some painting done this weekend. I haven't been making art, and last night I dreamed I was painting these gorgeous oil portraits, so I guess what I really need now is to expend some creative energies. Yeah, that sounds good. A little art therapy, bring down the stress levels.
And since I ran my mouth in the Beautiful Body thread, it's time to post these. The boyfriend helped me take the WORST pictures, my "just about before" pictures, because I have lost some weight being primal and definitely gained some muscle in the last couple of months. I put on my sparkly derby girl shorts, in which you can see my ass from space, and embraced the muffin top, which makes my waist look way bigger than it measures, and hell, after this, any "after" pictures will look great! I blurred out my tattoos because I ain't blurring out the cellulite, and the internets is a very small place after all. Once I'm all slimmed down and buffed up, I'll post whole pics, tattoos and face and all, but meanwhile, I'm gonna be a pussy about it.
And just cause the boy was goading me into some SheHulk posing:
Man, if I could just get rid of some of this fat, I'd have killer abs, I just know it! That stupid Mirena screwed me so hard, I really did used to have very little stomach fat, even at 20 pounds heavier. Grrr.
Ah, yeah, here's me at 175, 4 years ago, lookin' like a TART, but still, just getting back there (minus the tartiness, and obvious lack of sunlight, I worked at a bar and slept til 4 every day) would be a great victory.
Ah, well, anyway, bike riding, painting, and NO DRINKING this weekend, that's my plan.