[QUOTE=athomeontherange;1091222]Jen is right, there are some things an employer can not ask. I bet they can not ask age. There would be a discrimination case if they did![/QUOTE]
How does one disguise age at an interview? "Sorry but we have decided to go with someone else...."
canio- When I was the boss, we were told there was quite a lot we could not ask in an interview-age was one. Yes, we could infer it, but it does not need to be stated. Basically, the key is getting an interview FIRST. Then you "sell yourself", show his passion for this job and why he chose it later in life. Being fairly new in the field, he can go in at entry pay. A foot in the door is a foot in the door. That is a benefit to hiring him. As for his age, yes it might be a problem but now-a-days, ain't nobody retiring soon! LOL
[QUOTE=athomeontherange;1091236]canio- When I was the boss, we were told there was quite a lot we could not ask in an interview-age was one. Yes, we could infer it, but it does not need to be stated. Basically, the key is getting an interview FIRST. Then you "sell yourself", show his passion for this job and why he chose it later in life. Being fairly new in the field, he can go in at entry pay. A foot in the door is a foot in the door. That is a benefit to hiring him. As for his age, yes it might be a problem but now-a-days, ain't nobody retiring soon! LOL[/QUOTE]
I understand completely, I just find anti-discrimination laws amusing because unless the interviewer is an idiot they can find every reason to discriminate while making it look fair. I didn't get hired for a job once because I am a white man. I actually got the dude to admit it. It was awesome.
your right it is tough to prove. It can be done though.
P.S. Paula, I apologize if I am out of line. I wish I had some wisdom for you to make it all better.
At about 9:30 this morning, Bill decided he couldn't safely get to his school for class. He looked at me and said "Wanna Take a Nap?" (wink, wink) My thought, "You have got to be kidding."
I realized that as usual, he had no clue as to the depth of my upset over last night. To him, it all ended fine.
Instead of fooling around, we talked. I expressed my fear that his perception of the last 10 years is different then mine and that I am afraid his bad opinion of me from that time will never go away. Then I defended myself by reminding him again of all the things I did right and I acknowledged that he saved my Mom's life and things would have been different without him. I said that I should not have been the editor on his story because it upset me.
We went through last night step by step. I told him that It scared me when I heard him yelling at our 15 yr old and then growling at him menacingly as he had him in a headlock. I said that I wasn't sure I was even welcome to go last night. Then, even though we had a nice time, telling me how to behave, not introducing me and leaving me alone made me feel unwanted.
He told me that he apologized to Michael last night and that he felt terrible about it. He said he was sorry about the issues at the party and that I should know by now that he often forgets to introduce people and it is just bad manners. He had hoped that saving me from the table and whisking me off to the dance floor was romantic enough to make up for it. (It was romantic.)
He pointed out that he has fears and triggers that cause him to do things like remind me of the past, but that I also hold onto hang ups from the past. (True.)
Finally, I told him that I know the past 10 years have been hard on him too, but that he has changed from a forceful man to an angry man and he needs to do something about it. I told him that I felt like a hypocrite saying it, but that I thought things would get better if he improved his health. He agreed and told me what he was working on.
At that moment our 8 yr old knocked on the door and insisted upon watching a movie with us in our room. We both drifted off to sleep with our precious little man snuggled between us.
At one point, He asked if I was happy or wanted someone else. I answered that I was mostly happy, but I wanted us both to be happy. I have no plans to leave this marriage and neither does he, so we just have to hammer it out.
[QUOTE=Pebbles67;1091243]Instead of fooling around, we talked. [/QUOTE]
I'm glad you talked and got on the same page about these issues. Communication is vital, and sadly the last thing people do when they're upset. I often remind myself that I can't keep being mad at Brad for something if he doesn't know what he did wrong. Tell him is the first step to "getting over it". I hope this helps you and Bill get on a better path.
P, I am relieved to read all of that. Thinking back on all the positive posts you've made about your husband, I was hoping you might have a chat like this. A marriage is work, I'm learning, but it can be worth it! :) Thank you for sharing with us. I hope you are feeling better (sounds like it).
Hulky and I often end up having similar discussions where we both say, "Ah, yeah, I know better, but I forgot." I get hung up on past things, he forgets about some of my concerns, we both forget to communicate our concerns.
Glad you too had the heart to heart. Hopefully this will help mend the bridge and make it stronger.
To answer everyone's age questions, it is not on his resume, but the applications for employment have a birth date space. The choice is to put in the true date or lie. He has applied for many jobs, but never gotten an interview.
There is no nursing shortage in the Northeast right now. In fact NY is trying to make it harder to become an RN. You would need a Bachelor's degree instead of an AS.
[QUOTE=Pebbles67;1091256]There is no nursing shortage in the Northeast right now. [/QUOTE]
I've found the nursing shortage to be a lot like the teacher shortage. There is a huge one on paper. "We need 1 teacher per 18 kids. OMG there is a huge shortage!" In reality they hire one teacher per 35 kids/class. Nursing seems to be the same - we need 1 nurse per X patients but will only hire 1 nurse per 2X patients.