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When did confidence become an everyday thing for you?

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  • When did confidence become an everyday thing for you?

    Hi all! I feel I need to put a warning here- I'm going to expose my soft underbelly in a rather long winded way. It may be over-sharing to some people.



    Still here? okay then; story time!
    I have noticed many people on MDA get a surge confidence after becoming paleo. Sometimes its in relation to weight loss but sometimes just because you feel better eating this way/ are taking control over your health. I feel this too- I get up in the morning and I'm like "Life is great, I'm 22, I'm healthier and fitter than I've ever been, I'm about to earn my Masters, I'm a great student, a great teacher, I have a lovely (and handsome) fiance..." and the list goes on and I have a wonderful productive day. People open doors for me, guys check me out, girls want to be friends, my teachers are pleased when I offer my opinions in class, my students enjoy my classes and all in all, this is a long winded way to say everyone LOVES confidence. I want everyday to be like this and I think they should be.
    But I notice something weird, some days I just don't get this feeling. In fact I feel the opposite. I think "I could be stronger or leaner, my skin could be clearer if I stopped eating so much xy and z, I could do better on my papers (92%? whats wrong with me? I can do BETTER), my students aren't doing as well as they could, is a master of arts really going to help me get a job? my handsome fiance could do better..." and the list goes on. These days I'm not productive and people don't like me and I don't blame them. I know this is how I always used to feel- before paleo, before losing 30lbs and back when I ate cheeseburgers and tacos every day (Quick, whats worse than SAD? How about SAD + Mexico's standard diet). Thing is, I don't eat cheeseburgers anymore and nothing has changed from one day to the next but somehow I wake up with my brain thinking I'm still that person from about three years ago now. Somehow I think I'm that person that was covered in acne, was overweight, wasn't healthy, had a toxic home life and friends, had nothing going for her etc. The frequency of these days is rather random too. Sometimes its rare, other times its most days. I try my best not to let it get the best of me and try to go on as if I still feel the confidence from before but sometimes I get run down.

    I share this with y'all because my friends have never been in a situation like I was before. They've all been healthy and happy their whole lives. They just say; but you're doing/looking great now, what are you going on about? I was hoping some of you had experienced something like I have and could offer some insight on how you got over it. My questions are, am I the only one? Did any of you get over this or do some of you wake up feeling like you never changed/ went paleo? When did confidence become an everyday thing for you?
    Attached Files
    Last edited by eig; 02-28-2014, 02:44 PM. Reason: fix kitty pic
    "...You sort of start thinking anything's possible if you've got enough nerve.” -Ginny

    My story: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/i-now...#axzz2MzPtxo00

  • #2
    Eig, host ya pic on an outside site if you want us to see it within the next week.

    And you have no idea how many men's dreams were just shattered when you used the word "fiancé."

    I am glad you're having success though. Keep it up!

    I'll buy you around of victory wings sometime.
    "The cling and a clang is the metal in my head when I walk. I hear a sort of, this tinging noise - cling clang. The cling clang. So many things happen while walking. The metal in my head clangs and clings as I walk - freaks my balance out. So the natural thought is just clogged up. Totally clogged up. So we need to unplug these dams, and make the the natural flow... It sort of freaks me out. We need to unplug the dams. You cannot stop the natural flow of thought with a cling and a clang..."

    Comment


    • #3
      I'm the wrong person to ask; apparently when I was born I slapped a nurse on the butt and winked at her. I've had weapons-grade confidence pretty much my whole life.

      That said, knowing you're eating healthy and working out properly does a ton to breed confidence--and I think one key is not being "scared" of being confident, if that makes sense. There's some kind of perceived social stigma surrounding confidence these days, usually from people who lack it.

      When someone asks if I can do something (physical or jobwise) my typical answer is to shrug and say "Yeah, probably." Because I know I probably can.

      Comment


      • #4
        KITTY!!!!!!

        Confidence is still not an everyday thing for me. I still deal with anxiety and sometimes depression, though it's tons better than it used to be. Most of the problems now are bad habits. Maybe sometimes you are just waking up on the wrong side of the bed! Maybe you had an apple yesterday instead of banana. The brain is an odd thing. You could try tracking things (moods, your cycle, food, exercise) and see if a correlation pops up.

        But it could just be something totally random that you are not realizing. The question is: what do you DO on those off days? Do you indulge? Do you fight it? Do you reflect? Do you blame?

        For me, my off days occur more than once in a blue moon and I was able to track them to my cycle (the entire week before my period is AWFUL emotionally). On good days, I can't say I've noticed the level of sunshine & tweeting birds that you have but I am also pretty oblivious.
        Depression Lies

        Comment


        • #5
          Ok.. First thing is some people has misplaced confidence. Never put a confidence in a physical appearance because one day that will fade.

          Comment


          • #6
            Who you are comes from within. Your beauty or intellect is not dependent on the opinions, looks, or words of others. You are a beautiful creation whether you are perfect or not. Always think on the good things. Accidentally posted other before I meant to. Sorry

            Comment


            • #7
              My confidence grew when I became a mother.

              It's pretty stable since I hit 30.

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Drumroll View Post
                Eig, host ya pic on an outside site if you want us to see it within the next week.

                And you have no idea how many men's dreams were just shattered when you used the word "fiancé."

                I am glad you're having success though. Keep it up!

                I'll buy you around of victory wings sometime.
                Aww haha thanks! I do love wings.
                "...You sort of start thinking anything's possible if you've got enough nerve.” -Ginny

                My story: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/i-now...#axzz2MzPtxo00

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by namelesswonder View Post
                  KITTY!!!!!!

                  ...You could try tracking things (moods, your cycle, food, exercise) and see if a correlation pops up.

                  But it could just be something totally random that you are not realizing. The question is: what do you DO on those off days? Do you indulge? Do you fight it? Do you reflect? Do you blame?...
                  I should track it- it does feel random but it couldn't hurt to see. How I deal with it tends to change based on how much stress I've been under. For instance; at the begging of the semester I really have a pile of work to do. IF I have an off day here I'm more likely to sit down and cry or go home early and make a bunch of faleo desserts (which I typically NEVER eat). Sometimes I reflect and think about what I'm doing with my life, like asking myself if this degree is really worth it, etc. If I'm really on top of things I try and pretend its not happening. Sometimes I try and divert my attention by working harder or the opposite- playing when I should be working.
                  "...You sort of start thinking anything's possible if you've got enough nerve.” -Ginny

                  My story: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/i-now...#axzz2MzPtxo00

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by eig View Post
                    Aww haha thanks! I do love wings.
                    Me too. Thank god for 80/20.

                    Anyway, offer stands.
                    "The cling and a clang is the metal in my head when I walk. I hear a sort of, this tinging noise - cling clang. The cling clang. So many things happen while walking. The metal in my head clangs and clings as I walk - freaks my balance out. So the natural thought is just clogged up. Totally clogged up. So we need to unplug these dams, and make the the natural flow... It sort of freaks me out. We need to unplug the dams. You cannot stop the natural flow of thought with a cling and a clang..."

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Mr. Anthony View Post
                      I'm the wrong person to ask; apparently when I was born I slapped a nurse on the butt and winked at her. I've had weapons-grade confidence pretty much my whole life.

                      That said, knowing you're eating healthy and working out properly does a ton to breed confidence--and I think one key is not being "scared" of being confident, if that makes sense. There's some kind of perceived social stigma surrounding confidence these days, usually from people who lack it.

                      When someone asks if I can do something (physical or jobwise) my typical answer is to shrug and say "Yeah, probably." Because I know I probably can.
                      Haha, you sound like my brother! I jokingly said to him one day "You're so cocky" and he replied "That's what happens when your the best!" I don't fear that though, I dream of a day when I feel like that on a daily basis too.
                      "...You sort of start thinking anything's possible if you've got enough nerve.” -Ginny

                      My story: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/i-now...#axzz2MzPtxo00

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by althalou View Post
                        Who you are comes from within. Your beauty or intellect is not dependent on the opinions, looks, or words of others. You are a beautiful creation whether you are perfect or not. Always think on the good things. Accidentally posted other before I meant to. Sorry
                        Bingo. Great advice (in both of your posts! ), althalou!. Conditional confidence is a setup for some reeeeally down days, which will eventually become the norm and not the exception anymore. Give yourself credit for your awesome accomplishments and efforts, and cut yourself some slack when it comes to anything and everything that you allow to lead you down the path of feeling bad about yourself. Everything we think, say and do is HUGELY influenced by how we feel about OURSELVES. If that were as much a pet project as all of the other things we've all got going on here, it would simplify things and greatly improve our sanity, not to mention our enjoyment of life!

                        Congrats on your successes and know that you're not alone - we ALL have those damned down days. I think it should be the 3rd guarantee in life, besides death and taxes.

                        p.s. - take Drumroll up on his offer!
                        Life is not a matter of having good cards, but of playing a poor hand well.

                        - Robert Louis Stevenson

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Confidence is overrated. Confident people do stuff like bet on mortgage-backed securities or invade Iraq.

                          Better than thinking "I can do no wrong" is to think "I can do wrong and I'm still ok". Go for being whole.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by GoJenGo View Post
                            Bingo. Great advice (in both of your posts! ), althalou!. Conditional confidence is a setup for some reeeeally down days, which will eventually become the norm and not the exception anymore. Give yourself credit for your awesome accomplishments and efforts, and cut yourself some slack when it comes to anything and everything that you allow to lead you down the path of feeling bad about yourself. Everything we think, say and do is HUGELY influenced by how we feel about OURSELVES. If that were as much a pet project as all of the other things we've all got going on here, it would simplify things and greatly improve our sanity, not to mention our enjoyment of life!

                            Congrats on your successes and know that you're not alone - we ALL have those damned down days. I think it should be the 3rd guarantee in life, besides death and taxes.

                            p.s. - take Drumroll up on his offer!
                            So glad to hear I'm not alone. Sometimes I feel like everyone else has got it together...especially by the time you're earning a second degree and getting ready to tie the knot. I agree that how I treat others depends on how I feel about myself- that's one of the reasons I want every day to be a confident one. I'm not sure if I'd say my confidence is conditional though, unless I am misunderstanding? Conditional would be "If I ate paleo yesterday, I'm a good person and deserve good things." but what I feel I'm experiencing is; Today what I did today is good. Tomorrow its bad/ not good enough. Is this what you mean? I try to cut myself some slack either way- like I said, i just get run down sometimes and find it hard to. How do you manage it?
                            "...You sort of start thinking anything's possible if you've got enough nerve.” -Ginny

                            My story: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/i-now...#axzz2MzPtxo00

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Rojo View Post
                              Confidence is overrated. Confident people do stuff like bet on mortgage-backed securities or invade Iraq.

                              Better than thinking "I can do no wrong" is to think "I can do wrong and I'm still ok". Go for being whole.
                              What do you mean "whole"? How is it different?
                              "...You sort of start thinking anything's possible if you've got enough nerve.” -Ginny

                              My story: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/i-now...#axzz2MzPtxo00

                              Comment

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