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Importance of Significant Other's Eating Habits?

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  • #61
    Liquid Gusto you have a lot of patience with your S.O-I admire that as I am quite intolerant of that sort of thing. He does sound like he has some sort of OCD.
    My S.O is patient with me. I cook so he gets what I make but maybe ill do him turkey and I'll have pork chop cos I need fat. He isn't into fatty tastes. If he wants a pizza then he can have that and I'll do myself something. That doesn't bother me. He likes my cooking normally.
    I loathe cereal though-and diet fizzy drinks, sweets, pastries all of which he likes given half a chance. It irritates me when he eats them. I can't help it!!!

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    • #62
      Originally posted by eKatherine View Post
      No. You have a confident, smart, humble, empathetic, opinionated, rugged woman who manages to control her weight through excessive exercise. And when she is no longer able to exercise, she starts to put on weight. She can end up putting on a lot of weight.
      That would be my boyfriend's ex. She was very healthy and lean, but one fall about 20 years ago and her back was out of alignment by quite a bit. She died a year ago, definitely morbidly obese, swollen and completely out of it due to the painkillers which she ended up addicted to. When she was married to my boyfriend, she was vibrant and healthy and active.

      You just can't count on the woman you start out with to be the woman you end up with.

      For that matter, I could count myself in on that. I feel bad for my boyfriend, but I'm still trying to fix the concussion issues. When we met, I was 150 pounds at 5'6", lots of muscle. Not perfect, a little gut, but not really bad. Going Primal got me down to a lean 145, which was pretty much perfect for me. Two hits to the head later, and I'm pretty sure I damaged my pituitary. As of last week, I had put on 42 pounds in less than two years. Sucks for me, and I'm sure he's not thrilled, though he's amazing and would never say so. No insurance because I'm unemployed, so I can't fix it until I have some (probably not producing any Growth Hormone).

      You can damage yourself in ways you would never think of, and being an active go-getter doesn't make you immune.
      Durp.

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      • #63
        Originally posted by turquoisepassion View Post
        Might as well deuglify myself as much as possible Hehehehe.
        You've done a fine job.

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        • #64
          deleted
          Last edited by Liquid Gusto; 01-10-2014, 08:30 PM.

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          • #65
            deleted
            Last edited by Liquid Gusto; 01-10-2014, 08:30 PM.

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            • #66
              Originally posted by Liquid Gusto View Post
              I'm sorry this happened to you and you're unable to get medical attention. I'm assuming you're in the US since you said you don't have insurance. Would filing for state disability and getting Medicaid be an option?

              I would suspect your awareness that this is an issue that could be impacting your relationship means something to your boyfriend. I think it can be really hard on a relationship to have a major negative change occurring and not have it acknowledged as something that impacts both people.
              If you look at me, I look completely normal. And, for the most part, I am. A few anxiety issues in crowds, overemotional at times, occasional memory issues (usually when I'm emotional) and then the weight gain. Not enough of a problem that I can't work.

              I just keep looking for a job and planning for my own business in case that doesn't happen.

              The first concussion happened after we had been together for about a year and a half, and the second one about 8 months later, which is when the issues really started. So he knows what I'm like when I'm not dealing with this stuff. He's actually very supportive, partly because he's that way naturally and partly because he knows I'm trying to fix it.
              Durp.

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              • #67
                Geek and I have struck a happy balance: whatever we eat is safe for me, with whatever add on he chooses (bread, tortillas, etc.) Say we're doing spag. The sauce is safe for both parties, he gets noodles, I have spag squash. Say we're doing stir fry. There's a joint mix of veggies and meat he'll eat with no sauce that we both pull from to add our sauce and, in my case, extra veggies. If we're doing Philles, he puts his on bread, I don't.
                Between meals, the most it comes up is "Ooh, this looks like a good recipe/ restaurant. Is it [Naiad] friendly?" We've struck the unsaid balance that he eats mostly CW because he likes it, I eat sulfite free paleo because I don't have a choice.
                Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
                My Latest Journal

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                • #68
                  Originally posted by noodletoy View Post
                  am frequently surprised how "soft" people are when they are decades younger than i am. too much x-box, i guess?


                  Originally posted by Liquid Gusto View Post
                  My Mom would agree with this. She's said a few times how she thinks guys of my generation seem much more feminine compared to when she was my age (in the 70s). I always thought maybe men just weren't as comfortable showing their emotions back then, but maybe this is an incorrect theory?
                  i didn't just mean hipster androgyny, or men claiming to be more sensitive, but the weird (to me) lack of muscle tone in so many men and women under 30. when the weather is warm and arms and legs are exposed, too many people look like they never even walk anywhere or lift anything heavier than a slurpee. it's like a generation of marshmallow people.
                  As I ate the oysters with their strong taste of the sea and their faint metallic taste that the cold white wine washed away, leaving only the sea taste and the succulent texture, and as I drank their cold liquid from each shell and washed it down with the crisp taste of the wine, I lost the empty feeling and began to be happy and to make plans.

                  Ernest Hemingway

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                  • #69
                    It depends. A person who "doesn't like" things like sushi, fish in general, liver, etc., without even trying them is just a numbnuts as far as I'm concerned, so that would matter. A person who thinks the Angus burger at McD's is a gourmet meal and I probably wouldn't get along on a lot of levels.

                    But I wouldn't toss someone over because they like corn chips or a number of other things I've decided not to eat. It would go something like this. "Here's my list of potential trigger foods, please can we not have them in the home?" As long as he was cool with that, we'd be fine. If negotiations were necessary, that would be okay also. I'd even give him a fridge in his bedroom (I'm a separate bedrooms kinda girl).

                    There are so many things that need to jibe in a relationship. Someone would have to be a pretty crappy eater for me not to be able to work around it.
                    "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

                    B*tch-lite

                    Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

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                    • #70
                      Originally posted by picklepete View Post
                      Definitely worth examining, not a petty point at all.
                      Agree, part of my decision who to marry took into consideration eating habits.

                      It is well known that friends tend to pull towards the same weight; if one gains weight the other tends to do the same. Same goes for households.

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                      • #71
                        Originally posted by KimchiNinja View Post
                        It is well known that friends tend to pull towards the same weight; if one gains weight the other tends to do the same.
                        Actually this is not "well known" at all. There was a single study that barely rose to the level of "science" that only suggested this might be the case for people who hang out together ONLINE. It was based on facebook photos.

                        Same goes for households.
                        Correlation is not causation. It is common that what is assumed to be the cause is actually the effect. The fact is that people often marry others who are like them in many ways. And then they have kids who are like them, too.

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                        • #72
                          People are influenced by their environment.

                          When Asians move to the West they get fatter, when Westerners move to Asia they are pressured to get thinner. Same with friends, households, etc. There have been many studies on it, plus we can just use our powers of observation.

                          Secondhand Fat - WSJ.com

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                          • #73
                            Originally posted by KimchiNinja View Post
                            People are influenced by their environment.

                            When Asians move to the West they get fatter, when Westerners move to Asia they are pressured to get thinner. Same with friends, households, etc. There have been many studies on it, plus we can just use our powers of observation.

                            Secondhand Fat - WSJ.com
                            And when a McDonald's is built in Asia everyone gets fat.

                            Sent from my HTC_PN071 using Marks Daily Apple Forum mobile app

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                            • #74
                              Originally posted by Hannakb View Post
                              And when a McDonald's is built in Asia everyone gets fat.
                              Yup, that has been going on for awhile now.

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                              • #75
                                deleted
                                Last edited by Liquid Gusto; 01-10-2014, 08:31 PM.

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