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How often should we have sex?

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  • #46
    Can't we just come up with an equation?

    if X = total number of hours in a week = 168

    X - S (sleep hours)= lets say 52 = A, where A = waking hours = 116

    A - N, [where N is the total amount of hours spent on survival demands ( T + G + L, where T is Travel, G is gathering/hunting, and L is labor)] = Y, where Y = free hours

    A-N = somewhere around 80?

    So 80 - F, where F is time dedicated to family and tribal bonding/cultural behavior

    Let's say F = around 20 hours a week?

    So we get 60 hours / (C + R), where C is time-in-coitus, and R is recovery

    edit: We should add to N= T+G+L and to F perhaps a Multiplier based on dependent offspring
    Last edited by Mr.Perfidy; 06-03-2013, 10:55 AM.
    "Ah, those endless forests, and their horror-haunted gloom! For what eternities have I wandered through them, a timid, hunted creature, starting at the least sound, frightened of my own shadow, keyed-up, ever alert and vigilant, ready on the instant to dash away in mad flight for my life. For I was the prey of all manner of fierce life that dwelt in the forest, and it was in ecstasies of fear that I fled before the hunting monsters."

    Jack london, "Before Adam"

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    • #47
      A theory of 'relativity'

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      • #48
        It's impossible to be in a relationship without sometimes having sex when you don't really want to, but the other person wants to. That's what I think. If couples only had sex when they both really wanted it, the Earth's populatin would be severely diminished. Sex isn't a big deal, and a lot of times it's "meh, I could have sex, whatever." I think that's the way it is for women, but for men it seems that they are always ready for sex, and would most of the time *not* get to have sex when they want it.

        2 times a day? That seems rather excessive. It's not like a "per day" or "per week" thing for me, it's usually 1 or 2 times a day, several days in a row, then not for a few days. We used to have sex more, but now my SO travels for a living so sex is crammed often into the weeks he is home, and none whatsoever the weeks he is not here. Of course, men can easily fix that in the shower. I am just crabby, as a woman, craving the intimate part of it.
        Stumbled into Primal due to food allergies, and subsequent elimination of non-primal foods.

        Start Gluten-Free/Soy-Free: December 2012; start weight 158lbs, Ladies size 6
        Start Primal: March 2013, start weight 150lbs, Ladies size 6
        Current: 132lbs, Ladies size 2
        F/23/5'9"

        26lbs lost since cutting the crap.

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        • #49
          A good part of the sex drive is age and health dependent. At 19 or 20, my partner and I had sex on average 3-4 times per day. over the intervening years(and different partners) this has changed to to 3-4 times a week now that I am approaching 60, but sometimes it is every day for a while then none for a week. Some days it is still 2 times but certainly a lot less that at age 20. Both my partner and I have had health issues at various times in the last 5 year so in several instances there were months without sex.(or at least it felt like it)

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          • #50
            Originally posted by Grumpycakes View Post
            I have a very bad feeling about your relationship, sorry to say. Best case scenario is if you two do low-carb Primal together. If so, let him eat his carbs so he can get his libido back. Healthy men want sex more than once a month. .
            WTH with the LC bashing...
            I'm LC, husband isn't.
            I still have a higher libido than his, just like I always have had for the past 15 years.
            However... we don't need a 3rd party because we love each other and I can take care of my own needs sometimes.

            Reductionist thinking is reductionist.

            I do agree with you that libido is individual not M or F though.
            I've had a higher libido that just about every other person I've ever dated.
            Guys can usually keep up for the first while, but then taper off.
            It is what it is.

            My commitment doesn't feel forced. It's actually very comfortable.
            Fapping sometimes isn't a terrible burden and he is willing to meet me halfway in providing sex sometimes at my request when is isn't 100% in the mood, and I'm willing to lay off him at other times.
            Compromise kind of makes relationships work in many ways.
            Fidelity is important to him and I respect that.
            “You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.”
            ~Friedrich Nietzsche
            And that's why I'm here eating HFLC Primal/Paleo.

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            • #51
              Originally posted by Grumpycakes View Post
              I have a very bad feeling about your relationship, sorry to say. Best case scenario is if you two do low-carb Primal together. If so, let him eat his carbs so he can get his libido back. Healthy men want sex more than once a month. .
              I don't know how fair that statement is. We've been incompatible sexually as far as frequency five of the more than seven years we've been together. A solid relationship is more than just both parties getting banged as often as they'd like. I appreciate when it does happen, do my part to try and encourage it more and don't take it personally when it doesn't happen. Is not getting tail as often as we'd like a deal breaker? No. That's why we're both still here.

              And neither of us are low carb at this point...and this issue has been the same before we were primal, in good health and bad, under a lot of stress or not as much...it is what it is.

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              • #52
                i wouldn't say that sex drive is specific for men or for women. People have all different drives.

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                • #53
                  "For men, the more the better," he says. "The typical man who has 350 orgasms a year, versus the national average of around a quarter of that, lives about four years longer." And more than those extra four years, Roizen says, the men will feel eight years younger than their contemporaries. Is there an optimal number of orgasms for the average man? Roizen suggests, with a straight face, that 700 a year could add up to eight years to your life. This is an ambitious prescription: The average American adult male has sex just 81 times a year.

                  Roizen's formula may be new, but the benefits of sex and orgasms have been tracked for years, and there's some compelling hard evidence to back Roizen's claims. A Swedish study done in the '80s found that 70-year-olds who made it to 75 were the ones still having sex, and a Duke University study that followed 252 people over 25 years concluded that "frequency of intercourse was a significant predictor of longevity."

                  But the big kahuna of longevity studies was completed just 10 years ago in Wales. British scientists interviewed nearly 1,000 men in six small villages about their sexual frequency, then arranged for all death records to be forwarded so the scientists could record their life spans. Ten years later they determined that men who had two or more orgasms a week had died at a rate half that of the men who had orgasms less than once a month. "Sexual activity seems to have a protective effect on men's health," the researchers concluded.



                  Read more: Benefits of Sex - Health - MensJournal.com
                  Follow us: @mensjournal on Twitter | MensJournal on Facebook
                  Interesting article....... it seems MORE IS better (and healthier too!)

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                  • #54
                    yes, but what about women? no one is researching how many orgasms a woman needs per year. I'm guessing that if guys need 700, ladies need at least 2100.

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                    • #55
                      btw, seeing as my husband is *seriously interested* in longevity studies, i'll offer this up. . . how we definitely need to shoot for 700 a year.

                      16 times a week, btw, if you take a break during red tent weeks. i think it's totally doable. so long as you have a lock on your door (if you have kids).

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                      • #56
                        Originally posted by zoebird View Post
                        btw, seeing as my husband is *seriously interested* in longevity studies, i'll offer this up. . . how we definitely need to shoot for 700 a year.

                        16 times a week, btw, if you take a break during red tent weeks. i think it's totally doable. so long as you have a lock on your door (if you have kids).
                        Is it 700 orgasms or 700 sex sessions? Give me a couple weeks, and I bet I could hit 700.

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                        • #57
                          wilton,

                          apparently it's 700 orgasms according to whatever ssn679 found. Orgasms from sexual encounters, though, would be my wager.

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                          • #58
                            Originally posted by zoebird View Post
                            wilton,

                            apparently it's 700 orgasms according to whatever ssn679 found. Orgasms from sexual encounters, though, would be my wager.
                            I didn't mean myself. I think I would die if I did that...

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                            • #59
                              or, you'd get carpel tunnel syndrome.

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                              • #60
                                Originally posted by zoebird View Post
                                or, you'd get carpel tunnel syndrome.
                                Or go blind.

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