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Primal clashing with relationship!

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  • Primal clashing with relationship!

    Hey gang, I wonder if anyone has experienced anything like this, I just started dating this girl about two months into my primal journey, everything was going fine, but I really stepped it up now with nutrition and sleep, I won't eat at most restaurants, so whenever I suggest sushi or a place I know I can get a good salad she gets bothered by not going anywhere new, and I have also been going to bed an hour after the sun goes down, she gets mad I don't want to go out on the weekends because i'd rather wake up early and workout, AND on top of that she gets mad, and moody, and thinks I'm trying to show her up by ordering salads when we eat! I just like going to bed early! anyone?!

  • #2
    Don't live your life around somebody else, find somebody that fits into your life. It takes two to make a relationship work, and if she's not willing to compromise on anything, ditch her early. It's only been two months, it ain't even serious yet.

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    • #3
      Problem with the above advice is that if you're not willing to compromise on anything, you're never going to find somebody decent. Everyone has their quirks. My issue would be somebody complaining about me and getting moody two months into a relationship. Either you have a conversation if something is a problem, or you put up with someone's quirks good-naturedly (Yeah, he goes to bed earlier than my grandma, but he's so sweet and hot.... Bitching and moaning isn't something I put up with.
      If you are new to the PB - please ignore ALL of this stuff, until you've read the book, or at least http://www.marksdailyapple.com/primal-blueprint-101/ and this (personal fave): http://www.archevore.com/get-started/

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      • #4
        Yep, move along and find a girl who is less selfish (or even better is primal too)!
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        • #5
          It all depends on how much each person is willing to compromise.

          If you are willing to try new restaurants once in awhile or stay up later once in awhile... or as tfarny said, she compromises by not complaining because you're "so sexy and hot" ....

          If neither of those things are going to happen, then it sounds like it's over to me.
          Female, age 51, 5' 9"
          SW - 183 (Jan 22, 2012), CW - 159, GW - healthy.

          Met my 2012 goals by losing 24 pounds.
          2013 goals are to get fit and strong!

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          • #6
            If you're BOTH willing to compromise some, then it can work.

            The Boyfriend isn't Primal, but we get along fine because I'm not super hardcore about it, and he's not whiny about never getting pasta unless we go out to eat. We try to make the other person happy and not annoy the crap out of each other. If you're BOTH doing that, then it works.

            Just curious how this "going to bed an hour after sundown" is going to work when it's dark from 4pm to 7am in a few months. Can't say 14 hours of sleep is good for ANY relationship.
            Durp.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by RitaRose View Post
              If you're BOTH willing to compromise some, then it can work.

              The Boyfriend isn't Primal, but we get along fine because I'm not super hardcore about it, and he's not whiny about never getting pasta unless we go out to eat. We try to make the other person happy and not annoy the crap out of each other. If you're BOTH doing that, then it works.

              Just curious how this "going to bed an hour after sundown" is going to work when it's dark from 4pm to 7am in a few months. Can't say 14 hours of sleep is good for ANY relationship.
              This. I'm also wondering how the sleep thing will work when the sun starts setting earlier. And OP, what time do you get up and go to sleep? Is there some reason why you can't work out at another time of day and possibly shift your sleep a few hours later? And I agree with Tfarny that you too should talk about this and come up with a compromise. Her bitching about your lifestyle would be annoying, but your unwillingness to compromise would send some serious red flags up for me if I was her. If it we me, I would dump you. Not because I don't like your lifestyle, but because being in a relationship with someone who doesn't take your needs seriously sucks. Maybe try shifting your sleep and asking her to join you for a hike later in the day so you can spend time together then going for dinner afterwards some place where you can both get something satisfying. (I don't see why you two can't go someplace where you can get a steak, or a salad with grilled meat. Go for Italian and eat carpaccio with a meat entree.)
              Buy house, Demolish house, Build house.

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              • #8
                You and she just started dating, and you already can see that you have different goals and current needs. Perhaps it's time to move on. Isn't that what dating is - experiencing who's out there 'til you meet someone who fits into your life and ideals?
                "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

                B*tch-lite

                Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

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                • #9
                  If you are going all out 100% then that is the price you will pay. THIS is exactly what the 80/20 rule is all about! You can survive going to a lot of different restaurants in the 80/20 so do so if you want the relationship to work.
                  MY OH was doing a charity row and was given a $25 gift certificate to an Italian Restaurant. Did we go? Yea the the veal was pretty good.
                  Eating primal is not a diet, it is a way of life.
                  PS
                  Don't forget to play!

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                  • #10
                    I haven't been to a restaurant yet that didn't have salad, steamed veggies and plain meat. Even traditional (Americanized) Chinese and gringo Mexican (not Taco Bell) If you can't bend a bit, you will probably have the same problem with every relationship, unless you find someone as 'focused' as yourself.

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                    • #11
                      Man, I can't even get a girlfriend if I eat nothing but tacos with her.

                      Anyway, pretty much every restaurant has a plain steak. Ask 'em to fry it in butter
                      well then

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                      • #12
                        you go to bed as soon as it's dark, you only want to go eat sushi

                        yep, i'd be annoyed too
                        beautiful
                        yeah you are

                        Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                        lol

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by wolfman View Post
                          Hey gang, I wonder if anyone has experienced anything like this, I just started dating this girl about two months into my primal journey, everything was going fine, but I really stepped it up now with nutrition and sleep, I won't eat at most restaurants, so whenever I suggest sushi or a place I know I can get a good salad she gets bothered by not going anywhere new, and I have also been going to bed an hour after the sun goes down, she gets mad I don't want to go out on the weekends because i'd rather wake up early and workout, AND on top of that she gets mad, and moody, and thinks I'm trying to show her up by ordering salads when we eat! I just like going to bed early! anyone?!
                          Time to say good bye and good luck
                          Primal/Paleo is not for everyone, it's for those who have committed to understand.
                          READ THE BOOK! ...as Robb Wolf says: "Trying to convince people to save their own ass will burn you out."

                          Vegetarians are the enemy of everything good and decent in the human spirit, and an affront to all I stand for -- the pure enjoyment of food.” Anthony Bourdain

                          and yes, calories DO count my little piggies

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                          • #14
                            It sounds like you got religion with Primal, so you have choices to make: either find some way to take her out to places she would like while you stay as Primal as possible (her part would be not to harp on your dinner) and/or try totally new-to-both-of-you eateries (if she is that special to you) or just go with the Primal revival and let her know you chose Mark over her. You aren't married to her (if you were this thread would be answered differently), and from what I get from your OP, you both have a lot invested in having it your way, which won't work much longer.

                            Just one little, weensy bit of advice: in your zeal to do it all perfectly, don't place a Plan (even the Primal) over maintaining good relationships. Most (good) relationships can stand a diet change and/or some new exercise thing, but for that to happen, both parties need to be flexible - read: willing to search for the solution most acceptable to both. If either one of you won't participate in finding the third way, find a Primal or Paleo gal who can appreciate the path you are on.
                            I have a mantra that I have spouted for years... "If I eat right, I feel right. If I feel right, I exercise right. If I exercise right, I think right. If I think right, I eat right..." Phil-SC

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                            • #15
                              Tell her straight up she can deal with your habits or GTFO.
                              “The whole concept of a macronutrient, like that of a calorie, is determining our language game in such a way that the conversation is not making sense." - Dr. Kurt Harris

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