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  • The only primal person in my household/RANT

    I really apologize that this will be a long post... I'm looking for advice on a problem I am having, and I figured that there has to be someone here that has "been there done that" and may be able to help. A little about me: I'm a 19 year old female who lives with my parents and brothers who are also around my age. I am currently a full time college student, but I commute and therefore I live at home. I am 5'1 and used to be 156 lbs. I decided to lose weight, and I ended up losing 20 pounds last year. I was able to lose the weight by cutting out processed food and pretty much counting my calories, fat, carbs, and protein and making sure I stayed within the caloric ranges that CW recommends for weight loss. I finally got down to 135 lbs. Even at 135 lbs, I was still chubby though. (I would attach a picture, but I'm too embarrassed. The picture of me at 135 lbs DOES show that I have extra fat.) I decided to lose about 5-10 more pounds. I kept doing what CW says to do: eat lots of whole grains, fruits, vegetables, lean meat, low fat, and get tons of cardio in. Despite doing this, my weight wouldn't budge. And it's not like I was at my ideal weight or anything... I did have fat weight to lose still at 135 lbs. I have been trying for about half a year to lose more weight. I am STILL 135 lbs.

    One thing led to another, and I eventually found out about the Primal diet about 2 months ago. I read up on being primal and it makes a lot of sense to me. I have been eating Primal for about the past 2 months. At first I did great. My bloating went away, and also I realized I wasn't hungry all the time like I was on the SAD diet. I didn't have to eat 6 times a day anymore. Lately, however, I've had some issues with binging. It started off as a one time binge where I would eat a lot in one sitting and after that, no more. The next time it turned into an all day type binge where I would binge several times a day. Then it became more of a two day type binge where I would eat whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted for two days. Now its starting to turn into more than "just" 2 days... When I binge, it almost always consists of carbs. It doesn't matter if it is cake, ice cream, bread....or even fruit. I'll binge on anything that has sugar or is wheat or some sort of carb. These binges are done in private and I'm very embarrassed of them. I have never had this problem before going primal.

    What makes it worse is that I am the only Primal person in my household. In fact, the only other person who is even remotely interested in eating healthier is my mother. She and I are kind of a "team". But even with that.... she is not primal. The only thing my mom and I have in common with our eating is that we both try to avoid processed food. She still eats wheat. As for the rest of my family, they are not too interested in eating healthy. My 16 year old younger brother has the metabolism of a raging beast. He eats like total crap, yet he is very lean. My older 21 year old brother is about 10 pounds overweight, and his idea of eating healthy is just to eat less overall no matter what you are eating. My brothers eat a lot of things, and from time to time my mom will engage in it. Since my dad is not home often due to work, this leaves me as the only person who can not eat the things they eat. To be honest, I feel really left out when they eat things that are completely forbidden in the primal diet. Day after day after day of this happening, I eventually join in with them and this is how the binging starts.

    I know it is not their fault for my binges. I'm just so frustrated with myself because I feel like I can never have "just one bite". When I lived in the dorms in my college, it was so easy to eat healthy because I only kept healthy food in my fridge. But I moved back home to be with family, and I am finding it so hard to stay on track because I truly feel "alone" in this situation. I am so excited about all the articles I read here on MDA, I'm excited about my new vibrams that I got, I'm excited about my homemade bone broth, etc. I'm excited about so many things and I can't share it with them because they do not believe it. After a while, I just want to give up. I truly apologize for this being such a long post... but please if you have any advice for how to stick with primal when you are the only one in your family? I cant move out now, and I know it will get easier when I do move out. But what can I do NOW to fight these temptations of wanting "just one bite" of their food which leads to binges? Are the binges an emotional problem or are they my body's way of telling me that I need more carbs(healthy vegetables?) I am trying to lose weight

  • #2
    A poster called MamaGrok has a journal in which she will struggles with carb binges. The leptin reset is what finally helped her beat that. As for the living situation all I can say is it does get easier. Many things I used to love are repulsive to me now. Others just make me shrug. It took five months for me. Keep reading MDA because the sense of community will help.

    Comment


    • #3
      Theresa. First off thanks so much for your honesty and I'm really glad you're reaching out to the community for feedback and encouragement. I'm the only person that's primal in my house of 10. I've been sharing and posting updates about that experience on the thread "My roommates are trying to kill me". Which I originally posted as a bit of a rant during my first primal week (last week) because I was suffering such intense carb/sugar cravings. Thankfully the community has provided a lot of good encouragement and feedback, so I'd definitely encourage you to check out the thread.

      Though I've had my share of food binges in the past, it hasn't yet been a serious temptation in my 11 days of primal, but I'm also letting myself eat unlimited fresh fruit, which may be staving off worse carb cravings. One thing that's been key for me going solo-primal in a SAD household is having primal meal ingredients (eggs, meat and veggies) and snack-friendly food around (fruit, nuts, even some dried fruit, chocolate, pork rinds, etc). I always have a couple cans of tuna, bananas and a bag of almonds at the ready. I can't take "just one bite" either which is why I won't and when I want to, just stuff a few almonds in my mouth.

      Something that's starting to show promise in connecting with my roommates is I've been cooking a lot more (because I have to in order to eat primal) but I'm involving them in that and also introducing ingredients to them (such as coconut milk). Which is a win-win, because I have primal food to eat and so do they! Lastly, I may have overlooked it, but I didn't see a Primal Journal for me. Maintaining that and being transparent on a daily basis is part of my discipline of staying primal. So it keeps me honest and also encourages me to keep going on a daily basis.

      Hope some of this helps!
      My Primal Journal - Food, pics, the occasional rant, so...the usual.

      I love cooking. It's sexy science that you stuff in your face. - carlh

      Comment


      • #4
        The next time you feel like binging, try binging on bacon and eggs. Focussing on what you *will* do seems like a more effective strategy than always thinking abouto what you don't want to do.

        I think that part of the problem is that your binges are on the wrong foods.
        Last edited by magicmerl; 06-11-2012, 08:36 PM.
        Disclaimer: I eat 'meat and vegetables' ala Primal, although I don't agree with the carb curve. I like Perfect Health Diet and WAPF Lactofermentation a lot.

        Griff's cholesterol primer
        5,000 Cal Fat <> 5,000 Cal Carbs
        Winterbike: What I eat every day is what other people eat to treat themselves.
        TQP: I find for me that nutrition is much more important than what I do in the gym.
        bloodorchid is always right

        Comment


        • #5
          The leptin reset is what finally helped her beat that.
          Could you tell me more about the leptin reset? I have heard about it and I have read a little on it, but I can't find anything that will clearly tell a newbie like me how to properly do it. Thank you for the advice, I really appreciate it!

          Lastly, I may have overlooked it, but I didn't see a Primal Journal for me. Maintaining that and being transparent on a daily basis is part of my discipline of staying primal. So it keeps me honest and also encourages me to keep going on a daily basis.
          Funny thing, is that I read your thread about you struggling with your 10 roommates, and it reminded me of the problems I have with my family. It's great to know that I can't be the only one with this issue. I envy those who live by themselves. When I lived by myself in my dorm previously, it was so easy to eat healthy foods. Also, you mentioned a journal. How do I keep one on MDA? I'm pretty new, so idk how it works!

          The next time you feel like binging, try binging on bacon and eggs. Focussing on what you *will* do seems like a more effective strategy than always thinking abouto what you don't want to do.

          I think that part of the problem is that your binges are on the wrong foods.
          The stupid things about my binges are that I'll only want to binge on carbs. That's how I know that my binges are not actual hunger. Instead, I'm thinking that it is mostly just a psychological thing. Like you said, I should be focusing on what I can eat, not should eat. Also, maybe my urges to eat more carbs are a sign that I am depriving myself of carbs? I have been eating mostly meat, eggs, and fat(olive oil, avocado, bacon grease, etc). I have barely been eating any vegetables. I just realized that this is probably my body's way of saying it wants more carbs(healthy ones), not the bad ones that I have been reaching for.

          Thanks again everyone for the advice. I feel much better.

          Comment


          • #6
            Hey Theresa I'm 19 too, and I used to have serious carb binges too. I'd just grab anything sugary that was hanging around at my parents house, or buy a bucket of choco frozen yogurt and finish it off in a couple hours.

            In my experience I totally agree with you- for me it was totally a mental thing. Big thing is to make sure you are eating good food, and don't allow yourself binges- they always lead to more!

            I'm also in the same boat re being the only primal eater in the family. Not only do my parents and brother not eat primal, but my bf doesn't either, and does NOT like it when I fast. I learned that allowing yourself to even think about other food makes it harder. Don't think about how good their food would taste- think about how good YOUR food tastes. Your mind is incredibly powerful! Stay in control and don't second guess your choices.

            Em.

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            • #7
              yes, eat more vegetables. eat some fruit. if you didn't have an emotional binge problem before, i don't know why you would have one now
              beautiful
              yeah you are

              Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
              lol

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              • #8
                Well you never know- I really can't remember any carb binges before I started watching what I eat.

                Comment


                • #9
                  and it's also possible to be too vigilant about what you eat, and your body lets you know mouth first
                  beautiful
                  yeah you are

                  Baby if you time travel back far enough you can avoid that work because the dust won't be there. You're too pretty to be working that hard.
                  lol

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Eat carbs then. The clean, primal ones. Primal does not = low carb. Unless you want it to.

                    Eat really satisfying meals. I find there is less psychological urge to binge/stray when you feed yourself well and give yourself permission to really enjoy the meals you're eating.

                    And its unrealistic to apply a drastic lifestyle change for a very short period of time, and expect the people around you to adapt seamlessly.
                    Sandra
                    *My obligatory intro

                    There are no cheat days. There are days when you eat primal and days you don't. As soon as you label a day a cheat day, you're on a diet. Don't be on a diet. ~~ Fernaldo

                    DAINTY CAN KISS MY PRIMAL BACKSIDE. ~~ Crabcakes

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Great suggestions above! This is definitely an issue this time of year as some of us who are students find ourselves in less than ideal circumstances, and old habits die hard. Living alone and controlling your food makes primal a whole lot easier. I'm struggling with similar issues as I'm staying at my parents' place this month. Feel free to msg me or pop by my journal, if you need some support. We can get through this!!
                      Primal: Because I like to have my steak, and eat it too

                      Current Primal Journal
                      My Old Primal Journal - Surviving my summer away from home
                      Food blog: Sex or Chocolate: I choose STEAK!

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Theresa92 View Post
                        The stupid things about my binges are that I'll only want to binge on carbs. That's how I know that my binges are not actual hunger. Instead, I'm thinking that it is mostly just a psychological thing. Like you said, I should be focusing on what I can eat, not should eat. Also, maybe my urges to eat more carbs are a sign that I am depriving myself of carbs? I have been eating mostly meat, eggs, and fat(olive oil, avocado, bacon grease, etc). I have barely been eating any vegetables. I just realized that this is probably my body's way of saying it wants more carbs(healthy ones), not the bad ones that I have been reaching for.

                        Thanks again everyone for the advice. I feel much better.
                        As other people have said, eat more vegetables. They are awesome.

                        And also, carbs are not bad. Just avoid cereals and sugar.
                        Disclaimer: I eat 'meat and vegetables' ala Primal, although I don't agree with the carb curve. I like Perfect Health Diet and WAPF Lactofermentation a lot.

                        Griff's cholesterol primer
                        5,000 Cal Fat <> 5,000 Cal Carbs
                        Winterbike: What I eat every day is what other people eat to treat themselves.
                        TQP: I find for me that nutrition is much more important than what I do in the gym.
                        bloodorchid is always right

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Theresa92 View Post
                          Also, you mentioned a journal. How do I keep one on MDA? I'm pretty new, so idk how it works!
                          It's really just a thread that you start and update. Look around the Primal Blueprint Journals Forum to see how others are using them and read How to Use the Primal Blueprint Journals Forum" to get started. Some are more comprehensive than others, but at minimum would recommend listing each day what you're eating for meals and what you're snacking on. You can see mine here. I've tweaked the format a couple times to include more info and hopefully make it easier to read. Also I like including pictures. But that's just me.
                          My Primal Journal - Food, pics, the occasional rant, so...the usual.

                          I love cooking. It's sexy science that you stuff in your face. - carlh

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            I would recommend not having any of the "just one bites" that are offered to you. I can't deal with "just one bite" because it usually leads to a lot of bites, more than I possibly need.

                            As someone who's also the only Primal eater in the family, many of the meals cooked for dinner aren't Primal. My mother is the only one that really makes an attempt to cook Primal friendly foods but my father and my brother both cook dinner just as often as her, and it's usually pasta stuff and other junk.

                            I've found preparing my meals ahead of time to be an effective way to dissuade myself from trying the food they have out. If I have my own Primal meal ahead of me and know it won't hurt me (unlike the other stuff on the table) I'll be fine.

                            As far as the binges go, if you have to binge, binge Primal (meat, veggies, bacon, eggs) but if I seem to catch myself in a binging mood if usually means one of two things; either I didn't get enough carbs my last meal or I'm stressed. When I get stressed my sweet tooth kicks in and cookies/other sweet junk look very appealing.

                            Best thing I've found to do, when stressed, is to go out for some exercise; whether that's a relaxing walk, an intense run, or just a game, de-stressing is helpful in order to avoid a binge in my experience.

                            Also, like yourself, I have family members with fast metabolisms who can eat anythings (two brothers-they got the gene, I didn't apparently) so I get that it's tough seeing your brother stuff his face with bad food and not put on a pound. But remember, in the long run, you're going to be better off more likely. His metabolism isn't always going to be that fast...it will catch up with him.

                            Other than that, good luck and feel free to message me if you want to talk more in depth. Remember, Primal rocks
                            Went Primal July 25th, 2011.

                            Current Age: 25

                            Total Loss: 126 lbs

                            Starting Stats: Weighed 266 lbs, Body Fat 37.6% (100 lbs), BMI 40.9

                            Current Stats: Weight 140 lbs, Body Fat 15.2% (21.1 lbs), BMI 21.2

                            Current Goals: Get a stronger core through Pilates and continue being as Primal as I can be.

                            My Weight Loss Notes Now on a blog page. It starts with "My Weight Loss: Introduction." Available to the public, share with friends if you'd like!

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                            • #15
                              Beyond the obvious no-no's like wheat or hfcs-laden soda, the carb thing is an individual decision...the level that works for a sedentary pre-diabetic obese person with a lot to lose may not be ideal for an active young college student trying to to drop 15-20. Some "good carbs" might be fine, but I think you're right to be suspicious of any food that leads to "binging".

                              What's helped me most is having a clear idea of what I wanted to do, how I meant to get there, and why it would work--goal and commitment grounded in research. Which it appears you already have--congratulations on your progress! Then, a reliable, realistic, affirmative plan for dealing with cravings. Mine was (& still is): "BAS first." I made sure I always had the makings of a Big-Ass Salad ready to hand, which for me meant lots of avocados, mushrooms, almonds, tuna or bacon, & homemade EVOO/balsamic dressing in addition to greens.

                              The pledge I made was not "I'll never eat X again" but simply "When I'm jonesing for X, I'll have a BAS first." If I still wanted "X" afterward, I would have some and not lose any sleep over it. But more often than not, the craving went away. Early on, if people around me were eating something I liked (like pasta or tortilla chips) I'd often mix half a cup into my salad as a compromise...not ideal, but far better than making an entire meal out of it.

                              I've noticed that "cheats" seem to have a higher psychological cost when they're imposed from outside...which makes living with non-adherents tough. I don't think much of elaborate substitutes for SAD foods--the gluten-free birthday cakes with Splenda frosting and all that--but it is nice to have a stash of quasi-primal snacks for "emergencies". When the housemates break out the corn chips, salsa & guac it's good to have some pork rinds on hand so you aren't forced to cave in or feel like a pariah.
                              6' 2" | Age: 42 | SW: 341 | CW: 198 | GW: 180?

                              “Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.”
                              ― Søren Kierkegaard

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