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  • Frustrated! Alone in my household...

    Today I am frustrated, sad, and feel like this is the only place I can turn...first my situation.

    I am married and a father of a 14 yo boy and 12yo girl. In May I started juicing and cutting back on meat and eggs after seeing the documentary "Forks Over Knives. I lost weight (I am a 5'11' and went from 183 to 175). When football season started I made a huge batch of ribs. For a week I ate two or three ribs with my lunch. BAM! My workouts got better, I felt sooo much better, my weight dropped, etc.

    Completely confused, I just happened to find "Fat Heads" on Netflix. After watching that I bought Gary Taubes book and have since finished "The Primal Blueprint" and am halfway through "The Paleo Solution".

    I have been about 90% primal for three weeks and feel great! My weight is 168ish and I feel stronger, sleep about 9 hours a night, etc.

    My wife does not understand or agree with my nutritional lifestyle. She is overweight (I would guess 30 - 40 pounds) but her doctors assure her she is healthy as a horse. I have learned over the past 20 plus years to not push anything having to do with diet and exercise on her. She thinks I am crazy! (How could ALL the Dr.s on the planet be WRONG, she asks). But, I bite my tongue and walk away.

    Now the frustration...I started making my kids eggs/bacon/sausage with fruit for breakfast. They loved it! Wanted it EVERY day. Then, a few days ago, they started turning down the primal breakfast and asking for cereal with skim milk. Someone obviously talked to them and is injecting CW into them. This morning, as my daughter had Cheerios with skim milk. I explained to her at a high level how this raises blood sugar and insulin is produced to...blah, blah. She yelled at me to leave her alone and that I am wrong.

    This breaks my heart. There is a combination of influences here--her school, her mother, and her grandmother--that are "educating" her in the CW nutritional way. I explained to her later that it is my responsibility as a father to do what I think is best for her and that I believe, based on my research and how my system is reacting, that what she is hearing, CW, is not necessarily the best.

    Anyway, sorry for the rant. I am trying my very best to lead by example and not "force" my household to PB. I am alone in my lifestyle and it hurts me deeply so see my kids slurping down Cheerios when I am standing next to the carton of free-range, organic brown eggs.

    Thanks for listening. Any advice?

  • #2
    OMG right here man.

    My daughter is nearly 11 mo and she's being fed cheerios. I mean come on!

    The only advice I can give you is this: Develop a sweet 6-pack and worry about yourself.

    They will all head down "don't give a crap" lane and push you away with CW.

    It doesn't matter what medical science says. Even CW doctors agree children at my daughter's age should just have breastmilk. Whatever. I told my wife that if she wants to feed her cheerios, she is going to be responsible for her diet. Not me.

    I shed manly tears every night when I see my daughter suffering every day with terrible diaper rashes, screaming at 1AM every morning.

    You aren't the only one here with this issue.

    Where do you live anyway?
    Blag: The FPSJosh01 Ego Experience
    Follow me on google+
    Superraw: the Autism Buster blag
    "Don't spread the word, spread the butter"

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    • #3
      @fpsjosh01,

      Thanks for the reply and advice--it helps to know that I am not alone!

      I am in Tampa, FL

      Dan

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      • #4
        Originally posted by danthebucsfan View Post
        I am in Tampa, FL
        I see. I'm looking to network with a bunch of people who can't find support from their own families.
        Blag: The FPSJosh01 Ego Experience
        Follow me on google+
        Superraw: the Autism Buster blag
        "Don't spread the word, spread the butter"

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        • #5
          I have been slowly talking to my girls, 15 and 17 (in two weeks). It's taken time and love and encouragement and consistently showing them the material. I let them watch "Fat Head", "King corn", "Frankensteer" and others. I was a vegetarian for 17 years. It's been hard for me to do a 180 and then tell them to do the same. So, Primal works, I feel better and I keep gently plugging at them. Fix them Primal Pancakes with fruit and whipped cream. Fix them Primal Muffins. Keep doing what you're doing and they will see the truth. My 15 yo loves chicken and we didn't eat it all while vegetarian. Find what works for your kids (like bacon and eggs) and feed it to them for "special occasions" and then increase the special occasions to every other day and ...

          Kind of back door it, know what I mean? It's worked with mine but it does take time.
          The eyes of all hope in thee, O Lord: and thou givest them meat in due season.
          Psalms 144:15

          Annie Sires

          Freedom consists not in doing what we like, but in having the right to do what we ought.
          Pope John Paul II

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          • #6
            I, too, am alone in my household. Obese husband and daughter. They think I'm a nut. Interesting that I'm the only one who is normal weight, feel great and have a pretty upbeat attitude. And I'm happy to exercise most days. I'm never really hungry and they're always hungry. I don't have minor children, so I don't have to argue with anyone. Take care of yourself and maintain top notch health insurance for your family.

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            • #7
              You know, after watching fat head, my wife and mother in law stuck to their CW harder.

              It's a double edged sword.

              The worst always happens, especially if you're known to have a mental disorder already.

              Originally posted by sires6 View Post
              Kind of back door it, know what I mean? It's worked with mine but it does take time.
              Yeah, good luck with that. Going against everything they grew up on is more motivation to stick with cw than you think.
              Blag: The FPSJosh01 Ego Experience
              Follow me on google+
              Superraw: the Autism Buster blag
              "Don't spread the word, spread the butter"

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              • #8
                Sad thread is sad. I'm another one living in a household of SAD enthusiasts. I prepare primal meals for my kids and husband, but when he refuses to eat it, so do the kids. And on top of that, I have to deal with relatives who encourage our kids to gorge on processed junk. (Why in the world does every family gathering has to revolve around unhealthy eating?)

                The worst thing is that my oldest child is getting the CW message in school. Her teachers promote the heck out of the "healthy whole grains" mantra. Hmm, wonder who's behind that?

                Here's to us helping our families break free of CW and all the unhealthiness that goes with it.
                I'm retraining and strengthening my taste buds, one primal meal at a time.

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                • #9
                  OP that really is heartbreaking. I too am alone in the way I eat among friends and family, but I can't imagine seeing your kids turned against you like that. I'm sure as time goes on, and you become visibly healthier, your wife will come around. Just stick with it and don't give up, set an example for everyone else.

                  Originally posted by fpsjosh01 View Post
                  You know, after watching fat head, my wife and mother in law stuck to their CW harder.
                  This is why I don't recommend Fat Head to anyone; it's a terrible "documentary". The science may be sound but I constantly felt like punching the guy in his smug, smarmy face.

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                  • #10
                    I just want to say that I think it is wonderful how supportive you are of breastfeeding and how knowledgeable you are about infant nutrition. We followed CW with our first but our second had nothing but my milk until 10 months, which was when she began to feed herself. She's three years old and still nursing and is surprisingly aware of her body's needs.

                    My husband came home a couple of days ago from a long business trip and we had pizza- our once a month indulgence. She had bad stomach pains the next day and told me "I shouldn't have had that pizza, it was wrong and it hurt my belly!" This is her understanding, just from me talking about our food, describing how our bodies work and her questions about life.

                    It really must be SO hard knowing your little girl is hurting because of the food she is being given . Our first daughter had that constantly because at the time I didn't know how to feed her properly- so she got the cereal and grains all the time. Five years old and after switching to primal, no more digestive issues.

                    My husband is not primal, so sometimes his food choices become a stumbling block for the girls, but over all he is supportive after seeing how much better we feel.

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                    • #11
                      My wife and I are pretty good, I'm definitely more primal though. My older daughter (5) eats reasonably well but my wife still gets too many junky type snacks like granola bars, gummi bear like Scooby snacks for kids, goldfish, microwave popcorn, etc. The meals are usually good though, mostly meats and veggies although my daughter still likes her bread and pasta but if we force it, she can get full on meats and veggies. If we could just keep eating to meals, it would not be a problem and I could deal with the pasta and bread in moderation gradually switching to potatoes.

                      My older daughter is very skinny and has a hard time focusing on even eating. At times, getting her to eat anything is a challenge. Fortunately for now the younger daughter (2) is eating mostly primal.

                      A part of me looks at the absolute garbage I ate as a kid, and I turned out ok. I would not beat yourself up too much over what your kids eat. Part of being a kid is learning to think for yourself. If kids see you eating healthy, they will put 2 and 2 together in their mind, might not act on it for now but they may eventually. At some point too, you cannot force kids at a certain age to do things as it may be counterproductive, especially if your child has the "rebellion gene" and does the exact opposite of whatever you say. The best you can do in some cases is to provide a positive model, already by not being the "do as I say, not as I do" type of parent, you are benefiting your child with a postive role model.

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                      • #12
                        Continue to lead by example. I have an almost 4 year old. I'm primal and my husband is not. Our son will eat mostly like Mommy does. He has his burgers without the bun, eats all veggies and fruits except for okra and pickled beets and likes steak, chicken, fish, etc. He does think pork is reindeer meat but that's fine - he still eats it.

                        At preschool he often doesn't eat the starch and has the meat, veggies and fruit only. He does drink milk though. And he will still eat goldfish, pizza and some things like that.

                        I didn't feed my son cereal when he was a baby. He didn't like it. He's adopted so he was formula fed, but his first solid foods were veggies, then fruit, then meats. I give him a lot of primal meals now and he eats them no problem.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by petriquor View Post
                          This is why I don't recommend Fat Head to anyone; it's a terrible "documentary". The science may be sound but I constantly felt like punching the guy in his smug, smarmy face.
                          Got a chuckle out of this for similar reasons. I liked Fathead but I know what you mean about the guy's attitude. That being said, I've never seen Supersize Me, although Morgan Spurlock kind of makes me want to punch him in the face too.

                          I've got friends who watch 'documentaries' like it's a hobby and believe them to be gospel truth because some filmmaker dared to take on Big Giant Evil Corp America. I don't want to show Fathead to anyone because even though he makes great points, I don't want to come across as another conspiracy theorist.

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                          • #14
                            I am right there with you all. I am the only one in my family eating primal. I think the biggest issue with me and my family is that I am the one with the weight problem. My wife is thin (5'4' and all of 110 lbs) and my kids (girl 11 and son 8) are thin. My wife has never had a problem with her weight and she works out at the gym (aerobic classes and some weights) a couple times a week. I try to talk to her and get her to get rid of all the processed grains (cereal, bread, pasta and such). She says she cannot but I think it is more of the fact that she does not want to. It is hard to convince someone that looks healthy to change their ways. So like most other suggestions, I try a little at a time. She knows that since I have started eating primal, I am feeling better and my blood work has gotten better but it will still be a long slow process to get her over (if I ever do).
                            Do not give up, they are your kids and wife.....just see if there is another way around to get them to see/try it.

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by sstan03 View Post
                              I am right there with you all. I am the only one in my family eating primal. I think the biggest issue with me and my family is that I am the one with the weight problem. My wife is thin (5'4' and all of 110 lbs) and my kids (girl 11 and son 8) are thin. My wife has never had a problem with her weight and she works out at the gym (aerobic classes and some weights) a couple times a week. I try to talk to her and get her to get rid of all the processed grains (cereal, bread, pasta and such). She says she cannot but I think it is more of the fact that she does not want to. It is hard to convince someone that looks healthy to change their ways. So like most other suggestions, I try a little at a time. She knows that since I have started eating primal, I am feeling better and my blood work has gotten better but it will still be a long slow process to get her over (if I ever do).
                              Do not give up, they are your kids and wife.....just see if there is another way around to get them to see/try it.
                              Wheat addiction hit me hard too.

                              I still cheat, but that's on days when I do LOTS of walking.

                              I work for my cheats.
                              Blag: The FPSJosh01 Ego Experience
                              Follow me on google+
                              Superraw: the Autism Buster blag
                              "Don't spread the word, spread the butter"

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