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Gork wouldn't cheat in a relationship, right?

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  • #16
    I'm going to say this as "proper" as possible: He sounds like someone you would colloquially refer to in a derogatory fashion as a product that is used for feminine hygiene..........

    There are tons of nicer guys out there, who may not have that dude's sex appeal but will be 100% better. This guy sounds selfish in that "I get whatever I want end of story" sort of way. This "all about him" attitude usually never turns out too well in the bedroom either, which, I can imagine, would end up leaving one unsatisfied all around.

    Most guys who read this would be super bugged by the regardless of if you want it or not attitude this guy takes. I've had friends who got taken advantage by that sort of guy and it makes my hair bristle when I hear about them.

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    • #17
      Have all the hot hot hot sex with him you want...in your fantasies. Trust me, that will be FAR better than any sort of reality with him.

      RUN. Wait....make that SPRINT away.
      MTA: because it is rare I dont have more to say

      "When I got too tired to run anymore I just pretended I wasnt tired and kept running anyway" - my daughter Age 7

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      • #18
        Originally posted by runnergal View Post
        RUN. Wait....make that SPRINT away.
        hahaha
        I think that runnergal is the perfect person to answer this question.

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        • #19
          Why can't the woman play the aggressor in this scenario?

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          • #20
            You could turn it on him, tell him he has to break up with her, use him for sex and then ignore him completely, then you'd be saving yourself and his girlfriend a lot of heartache while still getting to satisfy your carnal urges. Any guy who pushes it so hard (no innuendo here) isn't gonna be that great anyway, if you gotta talk about it, you don't really have it...
            "It is not what you are that holds you back, it is what you think you're not."
            Denis Waitley

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            • #21
              Grok didn't sext, so clearly this hypothetical question of what he would do is irrelevant. He also didn't use indoor plumbing, unlike most of the men I'm attracted to...

              You can't do anything about his behavior, but you do have control of yours. It never feels good to be in a cheating relationship...and years later you may find yourself on the other side of another relationship, wondering if it's all because of karma. If he really wanted to be with you, he would break up with her. Harsh but true.

              And finally, it's an unpopular view in this age, but as someone who works in an STI clinic, I have to caution against casual sex, even with condoms. There are STIs you can get through skin to skin contact even if you're using condoms. With minimal sex ed these days, that's a message that doesn't get out much. I've seen plenty of people who have ended up with herpes infections after one act of intercourse using a condom (and while herpes is not generally a big deal, it's not fun having to discuss it with all your future partners). But more seriously, something like HPV that can cause cervical/oral/anal (even if you've never had anal sex) cancers but may take years or decades to develop...well, that's something anyone would really regret getting from a casual encounter with someone who doesn't take relationships seriously.
              Il faut vivre et non pas seulement exister.

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              • #22
                And you might not be the only one he's hitting on now, at the same time either, just another conquest. Walk away.

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                • #23
                  I like to be cross, so here goes:
                  OP is attracted to the guy FOR his "negative" qualities (aggressive, confident, probably a bad boy). It seems to be the case for younger women to be interested in the alpha-male rather than the frustrated nice guy who by the way has no power whatsoever and gets put in the friend zone.
                  OP can satisfy her sexual desires, or she can go looking for a nice guy that actually doesn't attract her.
                  Even if OP doesn't sleep with the guy, he will just find another girl or break up with his girlfriend because she isn't meeting his needs (whatever they are, not saying it's moral). This is a problem between him and his girlfriend, not the OP.

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                  • #24
                    Originally posted by sammerb View Post
                    I pretty much told him it's not going to happen, but he said he's just going to keep pursuing me. And just sort of sexually attack me one day. I said I'll just say "no". He said "good luck with that".

                    I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and say that he is joking, but anyone who thinks that sexual assault can be cute or funny or attractive needs a golf shoe to his chest.

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                    • #25
                      Why can't the woman play the aggressor in this scenario?
                      I'd normally say, no reason, except the op sounds like she's still in high school and far from a "women."

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                      • #26
                        Originally posted by Pandadude View Post
                        I like to be cross, so here goes:
                        OP is attracted to the guy FOR his "negative" qualities (aggressive, confident, probably a bad boy). It seems to be the case for younger women to be interested in the alpha-male rather than the frustrated nice guy who by the way has no power whatsoever and gets put in the friend zone.
                        OP can satisfy her sexual desires, or she can go looking for a nice guy that actually doesn't attract her.
                        Even if OP doesn't sleep with the guy, he will just find another girl or break up with his girlfriend because she isn't meeting his needs (whatever they are, not saying it's moral). This is a problem between him and his girlfriend, not the OP.
                        I actually like this answer best so far. Kinda along the lines of what I was thinking.
                        Heather and the hounds - Make a Fast Friend, Adopt a Greyhound!

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                        • #27
                          Originally posted by huntergirlhayden View Post
                          You could turn it on him, tell him he has to break up with her, use him for sex and then ignore him completely, then you'd be saving yourself and his girlfriend a lot of heartache while still getting to satisfy your carnal urges. Any guy who pushes it so hard (no innuendo here) isn't gonna be that great anyway, if you gotta talk about it, you don't really have it...
                          I don't think it's possible for you to turn it on him and use him for sex, since all (and sorry to get so graphic about this, but let's be real) he sees you as is easy pussy on the side (easy only because he probably knew that you were crushing on him). A guy like this will be the one to start ignoring you after sex, and even if you also ignore him, he will have considered himself the 'winner,' and do you really want to demean yourself like that??

                          When you decline his advances in the future, don't do it with a smile and giggle. Say it with a straight face, and distance yourself from him. Now that he knows that you're interested, he sees you as 'potential pussy' and there is no potential for friendship left anyway. But you sound like you're still ambivalent, so you also need to make up your mind to do this.

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                          • #28
                            I shall say no and sprint away lol. Because then I'll maintain all the power, and prevent me and the other girl from ever getting hurt. Plus it will drive the poor boy nuts!! Because he's defiantly use to getting what he wants! Muahahaha. Oh well, too bad for him.

                            He is a bit of an alpha, but I'm an alpha female so I guess his pursuits are only natural. And I must say that the occurrence of an actual relationship with him was never something I really wanted. He's just the kinda guy I want to fool around and have fun with. I know that he's never cheated in past relationships. But the thought that he would do this to his current girlfriend is a major turn off, and does not make me consider him to be a suitable partner what-so-ever, regardless of his other qualities.

                            And you know what.... if he really thinks I'm that great he'll break up with her. But until then, I'm off limits.

                            I will say that he had no idea that the feelings were mutual. I'm super hard to read, which I think only contributed to his frustration and burning desires. lol. So I don't think he ever saw me as an easy piece. I'm actually the kind of girl he would date personality wise, because before he got up the guts to sext me he would always take note of certain traits I possessed, and oddly enough they all had to do with my brain.


                            But for serious.... no one get's up my skirt till they buy me a big juicy steak. That's the NEW RULE!!
                            Last edited by sammerb; 02-20-2011, 08:50 AM.

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                            • #29
                              Originally posted by sammerb View Post
                              I shall say no and sprint away lol. Because then I'll maintain all the power, and prevent me and the other girl from ever getting hurt. Plus it will drive the poor boy nuts!! Because he's defiantly use to getting what he wants! Muahahaha. Oh well, too bad for him.

                              He is a bit of an alpha, but I'm an alpha female so I guess his pursuits are only natural. And I must say that the occurrence of an actual relationship with him was never something I really wanted. He's just the kinda guy I want to fool around and have fun with. I know that he's never cheated in past relationships. But the thought that he would do this to his current girlfriend is a major turn off, and does not make me consider him to be a suitable partner what-so-ever, regardless of his other qualities.

                              And you know what.... if he really thinks I'm that great he'll break up with her. But until then, I'm off limits.

                              I will say that he had no idea that the feelings were mutual. I'm super hard to read, which I think only contributed to his frustration and burning desires. lol. So I don't think he ever saw me as an easy piece. I'm actually the kind of girl he would date personality wise, because before he got up the guts to sext me he would always take note of certain traits I possessed, and oddly enough they all had to do with my brain.


                              But for serious.... no one get's up my skirt till they buy me a big juicy steak. That's the NEW RULE!!
                              Go girl! Tell him when he's unattached he can be your toy, not before then! Tables turned!

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                              • #30
                                Hmm...I am seeing this scenario...

                                DB Guy: "Hey, OP I broke up with my GF"
                                OP: "Sweet!"
                                <insert hot monkey sex here>
                                a couple of days pass...

                                DB Guy: "So I got back together with my gf but we can keep f*cking right?"
                                OP: "well damn"

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