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Having a REALLY hard time staying primal =( Need encouragement

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  • Having a REALLY hard time staying primal =( Need encouragement

    Hey everyone,
    I've been having a REALLY hard time staying primal and trying to figure out what the heck to do to get my mind OUT of this icky funk!
    I'm breastfeeding my almost 5 month old&she needs to gain more weight too so the docs get off my back about giving her formula. She's totally alert&happy&tries to talk and all the good stuff, she's just really skinny&so was my son. He is STILL skinny&now a little over 2. He was a formula baby because I wasn't producing enough milk for him&ended up supplementing&it was a downward spiral from there. When he started solids, he was primal ALL THE WAY because those are the foods he asked for. To this day, he asks for meat/eggs/cheese - fatty stuff - and loves his veggies (proud mama here)! I keep trying to think "I gave birth naturally TWICE, I can do anything!" but it's not working
    Anyway, back to the issue - I've been extremely stressed out to the point of it affecting my milk supply, I always feel hungry...ALWAYS.Even right after I eat a decent meal.
    I need to recondition my brain to love veggies again because when I got pregnant with my 2nd bundle of joy, I would gag on veggies for some odd reason&am having a hard time eating them now. So definitely need more veggies.
    I am just always hungry and it's SO frustrating.And discouraging. I've thought about just fasting on tea with coconut oil and then I think I could never do that. Granted, I love food, and I love the act of chewing for some reason, so fasting on tea&coconut oil is... almost a depressing thought.
    Anyway, I would love to hear stories of how you overcame your battles.
    I'm also sorry if I sound whiny or like I don't understand primal, or if you just don't like my post, but I need help. I am so tired of hating the way I look and the way I feel, I just want to be able to love who I am so I can lead a happier life so my kids&husband don't have to live with a depressed, suicidal, fat cow.
    Heaviest - 4/28/11 - 190
    - 1/12 - 171.4
    - 07/12 - 160&got pregnant!
    - 11/12 - 150ish
    Losing fat but gaining baby? WOO!
    Goal - healthy, happy baby and happy mama!


  • #2
    Hello. I'm sorry that no one hasn't replied. I am going through the same thing. It is brutal. If us ever want to chat let me know.
    Get busy Groking or get busy dying. That's damn right!

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    • #3
      Please tell me that you and your son are not low carb...

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Zach View Post
        Please tell me that you and your son are not low carb...
        +1
        Ones who try my curry are not ones to leave in a hurry

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by lolawolf View Post
          I am so tired of hating the way I look and the way I feel
          Despite our vastly different circumstances, I can relate to you on that count. We punish ourselves way too much for the way we look. We go to inane extents to look a certain way and that affects the way we feel.

          I have no experience in raising a baby, so it might not be my place to advice, but I feel you should be doing whatever it takes to be healthy, regardless of what you think it may make you look like. Eat, eat and eat. Don't worry too much about being primal. Visit the below listed website, you might find good advice and reassurance there:

          Go Kaleo | Are you as tired of fad diet as I am?
          Ones who try my curry are not ones to leave in a hurry

          Comment


          • #6
            I think my body just hates me. I try to eat less&my milk supply drops but if I eat the way I have been, I'll gain weight so it's really frustrating.
            I don't think I'll even be able to lose weight until after I'm done breastfeeding. I just hate feeling heavy&gross&like everyone's judging me.
            My son is low carb most of the time with the occasional fruit or rice. He REALLY likes rice, but usually asks for meat. Lately he's been on an "almond budder sammich" kick on gluten free bread since I introduced them to him recently.
            I try not to have many carbs but the more I eat, the more I want&I've been anorexic&now I'm a binge eater it seems like. Kind of other end of the spectrum I guess.
            I wanted to go primal again mostly to find out if it would make my milk supply fattier since I couldn't find any research about it that was conclusive. It was more like "well it depends on the woman, just like everything else". I make a lot of foremilk, don't have much hindmilk so I'm seeing if I can fix that myself before I feel even more like a failure.
            Stress is a huge factor, I think. I get close to having panic attacks and all I want to eat is sweet stuff. Or like... squishy baked goods.
            UGG.
            Heaviest - 4/28/11 - 190
            - 1/12 - 171.4
            - 07/12 - 160&got pregnant!
            - 11/12 - 150ish
            Losing fat but gaining baby? WOO!
            Goal - healthy, happy baby and happy mama!

            Comment


            • #7
              I just want to feel pretty&I totally don't. My husband thinks I am beautiful, but I want to think I am, too.
              Heaviest - 4/28/11 - 190
              - 1/12 - 171.4
              - 07/12 - 160&got pregnant!
              - 11/12 - 150ish
              Losing fat but gaining baby? WOO!
              Goal - healthy, happy baby and happy mama!

              Comment


              • #8
                Firstly, you are not a failure, if you have been feeding your bub for 5 months thats wonderful.

                Please don't try to eat less whilst breastfeeding.

                You will need loads of food. Relaxation is important too.
                I fed twins, and found that I was eating constantly, I drank loads of juice and water as well..
                When the girls were 1, I was 15kg lighter than before I got pregnant. Everyone is different of course, but when you finish feeding thats when you should worry about weight loss ( if you have any left to lose)
                While breastfeeding your metabolism is in overdrive.
                Not the time to worry about how you look but No. 1 priority is to nourish yourself and your little one.
                It's a hard road but totally worth it, and I'm sure your husband is right
                All the very best.
                Last edited by Slinkykitty; 08-28-2013, 12:23 AM.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Slinkykitty View Post
                  Please don't try to eat less whilst breastfeeding.
                  This. You need to fuel yourself to produce milk.

                  Also primal does not have to be low (under 50) or zero carb. (Primal) carbs are fine to eat. Especially for your son! Growing children do NOT need to be low carb.

                  What are you eating now? List a day or two's worth of food.

                  I don't have much knowledge about eating disorders so I can't touch on that, but restriction tends to cause people to binge and go overboard later -- Your body wants the food you aren't giving it. Just include a wide range of foods (including good carbs!) into your daily diet, and you probably wouldn't feel the need to go overboard later on. It will quite possibly also help your mood. Low carb made me depressed and lethargic, it doesn't work for everybody.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Slinkykitty View Post
                    Firstly, you are not a failure, if you have been feeding your bub for 5 months thats wonderful.

                    Please don't try to eat less whilst breastfeeding.

                    You will need loads of food. Relaxation is important too.
                    I fed twins, and found that I was eating constantly, I drank loads of juice and water as well..
                    When the girls were 1, I was 15kg lighter than before I got pregnant. Everyone is different of course, but when you finish feeding thats when you should worry about weight loss ( if you have any left to lose)
                    While breastfeeding your metabolism is in overdrive.
                    Not the time to worry about how you look but No. 1 priority is to nourish yourself and your little one.
                    It's a hard road but totally worth it, and I'm sure your husband is right
                    All the very best.
                    Totally agree with this.

                    Please, just eat. Lots and lots of good food, eggs, meat, fruit, veges if you feel like them, drizzle them in olive oil or dripping, or coconut cream. Butter. Nuts. Chocolate. Cheese. It's sometimes hard to get enough in unless you really go for the high-calorie stuff.

                    You can do the same for your little man. I've had underweight children and had to learn to make every bite count, no empty calories for them.

                    Pour yourself a nice drink before you sit down to nurse, the letdown will make you feel thirsty.

                    Also, not sure if baby is on solids yet, but you could probably start now with a teaspoon or so here and there in addition to her breastfeeds. Then maybe she will not need to be put on the bottle. But even if you do end up doing that, always be proud that you have still given her fantastic start in life by nursing her to date.

                    Very very best wishes.

                    Oh., and maybe you need to find someone to talk to, just in case you are feeling some version of post natal depression, it's very common.
                    Annie Ups the Ante
                    http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread117711.html

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Also, your body does not hate you. Your body is a marvellous vessel that has just conceived, birthed and is continuing to support the life of a new human being. This is a wonderful thing, but very draining and needs to be treated gently.
                      Annie Ups the Ante
                      http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread117711.html

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Annieh View Post
                        Also, your body does not hate you. Your body is a marvellous vessel that has just conceived, birthed and is continuing to support the life of a new human being. This is a wonderful thing, but very draining and needs to be treated gently.
                        Beautifully put, Annieh. Our bodies are trying to protect us, even if we don't like how they are doing it. I guess they're like teenagers sometimes, and don't do what we want RIGHT NOW (or even in 6 months). So what do we do with teenagers? We are patient. And just keep drumming that note... Sooner or later, our teenage kids grow up and then, if you're lucky, they come back and say "jeez, mom, you were right."
                        Same with bodies...
                        We gotta keep doing it until our bodies "believe" us. Then they fall into line, but in their own particular line, and it may not always be the ideal we had in our head. Just like our kids...!

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                        • #13
                          Please just eat for your babies sake. Eat fruit if you feel like sugar! Also let your son eat whatever he wants (within reason). Ice cream and rice can both be healthy foods.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Thank you for your replies,everyone.
                            I think I'm still getting used to the idea of eating more for breastfeeding. I haven't lost any weight since giving birth, whereas with my son, I lost 10 pounds at least from him at least coming out. With my daughter, I think I've gained weight&it doesnt help coming from a family with a background of eating disorders&emotional abuse about eating. SUPER fun stuff! Not.
                            Lately I have been SO thirsty that I'll drink a full 16oz, feel bloated&like I want to puke but still be thirsty.
                            I forgot my son asks for "special" drinks like milk, coconut water (his fave), and whatever juice we have on hand. The milk I give him straight unless he's had a lot of dairy that day (he LOVES cheese, just like his mama haha) then I'll give him half water/half juice. Stuff is so sweet it needs to be watered down anyway. Coconut water I give to him straight cuz of electrolytes&what not especially if we've been playing outside on a hot day&he's covered in sweat.
                            When I tried low carb before, I felt great&lost like 10 or 15 pounds in my 1st trimester, but then gained that all back plus 10pounds by the time my daughter was born. But hey, 20 pounds gain is a lot better than the 80 I gained with my son.
                            I've found that canned coconut cream gives me heartburn so I stay away from it now =( coconut milk is ok but tastes very icky to me. My son will eat.... anything. I actually can't think of anything he's turned down when he was hungry.
                            We've started the baby on solids, just a little bit every day but she seems to like it. We had a WIC appointment yesterday&they gave me some good start gentle formula to mix with her oatmeal if I felt like she needed it, which I don't. She's just a slow gainer - VERY happy and very alert, holding her head up, just a slow gainer. My husband was concerned but only because if we need to take her to a doc, he's scared they'll think she's too skinny&call CPS. Stupid CPS. It would be a great system if they actually helped kids who needed it instead of just taking kids away from parents who don't do anything wrong.
                            Last night I was craving milk and I always give into that craving since it feels nice&cool and tastes awesome. I love whole raw milk but it's so expensive here&my husband drinks milk like... well like a calf lol. Plus, we get lactaid since we're all lactose intolerant when it comes to milk. Cottage cheese is fine, soft cheeses are ok but to an extent. Ice cream is horrible on us lol My husband&son are also gluten intolerant and I probably am too.
                            Anyway, what I eat in a day... let's see... well for example today (by the way, my son usually wants whatever I'm eating):
                            Probably have a pork chop for breakfast since that sounds pretty good&fry up a couple eggs in butter
                            Glass of milk sounds AMAZING
                            Lunch might be... pulled pork with a slice of pepperjack on top but that didnt fill me up yesterday so I'm not sure what I'll do about that
                            Berry smoothie sounds amazing too, think I'll save that for a snack later. MMMMMMM
                            We have a ton of eggs, some romaine, carrots, onions, mushrooms OH dinner i'll probably fry up some onions&mushrooms&garlic and eat it with pork. or just by itself. LOVE that stuff.
                            When I snack it ends up being on not so good stuff. Like almond rice crackers we get from the store. Or nutella on a piece of gluten free bread. I snack a lot. It's not very easy sitting down to have a meal with a toddler&a new-ish born, so I eat really fast because usually I get hungry so I'll make some food then as soon as I sit down to eat, my daughter's hungry or my son needs a refill in his sippy or is hungry too lol
                            There's so many other young moms where I live&they're skinny&beautiful&I'm like "wtf why not me???" It's frustrating but I've always had weight management problems. Plus since getting pregnant with my first, it's made it even more difficult like the fat just wants to stay forEVER.
                            I'll give eating more a try&touch base in a couple weeks.
                            Heaviest - 4/28/11 - 190
                            - 1/12 - 171.4
                            - 07/12 - 160&got pregnant!
                            - 11/12 - 150ish
                            Losing fat but gaining baby? WOO!
                            Goal - healthy, happy baby and happy mama!

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by lolawolf View Post
                              I think my body just hates me. I try to eat less&my milk supply drops but if I eat the way I have been, I'll gain weight so it's really frustrating.
                              You are breastfeeding. You need to eat. If you gain weight, so what? You can lose it again.

                              You can train yourself to eat more calories without weight gain but it's a long slow process. For the health of yourself and your infant you should just eat to support your breastfeeding, then afterward work on any weight gain. And I really don't know much about what breastfeeding does to the body, but it may turn out that if you eat well during your breastfeeding months you may automatically reset and restore a healthier metabolism that allows you to eat like a human being and not like a starving war victim.
                              Female, 5'3", 50, Max squat: 202.5lbs. Max deadlift: 225 x 3.

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