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  • My mom is my mom & she has a pathology of some sort about running lives of anyone who dares approach her and lacking empathy. She is probably some kind of a sociopath... I am not qualified to call the judgement. In addition she is inconstant, and generates conflicting opinions every hour on the hour. She succeeded to destroy every relationship she had had in her life. Except for I will remain her daughter to the bitter end. I understand that, but as YB said - programming is hard to overcome.

    YB, my latest piece de resistance is to cast the body fat in the valuable resource for muscle building light. I am not sure if the fat layer is sufficient to allow my body to start generating muscle but at least it's there.

    Overall though, I know that my sleep and well-being improved dramatically since I have gained weight. Now, that inflammation is starting to get under control + sleep increased, the energy and strength are coming back in patches. Still, the "but why or why I can't have it *and* be thinner?" remains.
    Last edited by Leida; 06-14-2013, 10:33 AM.
    My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread57916.html
    When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.

    Comment


    • Originally posted by Leida View Post
      Overall though, I know that my sleep and well-being improved dramatically since I have gained weight. Now, that inflammation is starting to get under control + sleep increased, the energy and strength are coming back in patches. Still, the "but why or why I can't have it *and* be thinner?" remains.
      I think those are amazing results! I have similar ones too - it's incredible to finally be sleeping the night through after nearly a decade of chronic insomnia. And my mood is definitely much improved.

      Let's keep the faith that even better improvements are on the way, and that our bodies are still adjusting. If you're still experiencing the burn out, then maybe you're not ready to drop any fat / build. Treat yourself as though you're recovering from an illness, or at least a really stressful period of time. Now if I can just take my own advice...

      Also, it might be worth cutting back on what you're restricting, as Dilbury suggested. But ultimately, just do what feels right for you, and trust that it's all going in the right direction. Hugs to you.
      "I think the basic anti-aging diet is also the best diet for prevention and treatment of diabetes, scleroderma, and the various "connective tissue diseases." This would emphasize high protein, low unsaturated fats, low iron, and high antioxidant consumption, with a moderate or low starch consumption.

      In practice, this means that a major part of the diet should be milk, cheese, eggs, shellfish, fruits and coconut oil, with vitamin E and salt as the safest supplements."

      - Ray Peat

      Comment


      • I've been following along and at this point don't have too much to add. I have my up and down days with how I feel about myself, and I am still trying to work on loving myself as I am right now (which of course is easier on the "up" days!). Since I've decided to focus on strength training, I've been reading a lot of the Girls Gone Strong posts, and Molly Galbraith posted up a good one today about our relationships with our bodies - Itís Hard Out Here for a Fit Chick (Part 2) | Molly Galbraith
        It's a good read, but I thought that the link to Part 1 of the article at the beginning was an even better read. I'm bookmarking these for my inspiration file.

        Thanks to dilberryhoundog for compiling all of that info. I'm intrigued and will check out your thread for more info.

        And YogaBare, I have been meaning to tell you for ages that I love your sig. I absolutely adore Bill Hicks (and psychadelics, for that matter!).

        Magnolia, I wish I had your great taste in clothes! My sense of style had gotten much better, prior to my now constant companion of what looks like a 3-4 month pregnant belly. I'd much rather have my weight gain be evenly distributed! Pants have become my nemesis (anything with a waistband, really!), and I've started embracing flowly dresses to hide the "bump". Part of getting my ass back in the gym and hitting the weights hard is an attempt to at least be able to flaunt toned arms and legs, while camouflaging my middle.
        And thanks for posting Choco's quote from the other thread, that's good stuff. I can definitely get behind caring for my greatest possession.

        Comment


        • Heya, well, lookie what yahoo send us today, right on topic:

          Yahoo!

          And, thank you, YB!

          Yep, I am planning to start adding foods back once the inflammation stops running from one system to another as it did since the end of April. I am actually thinking I might not need to cut out nuts.

          Let me know how sprints are going. The rain started on my 9th wind-sprint, so I am officially back to sprinting. Dunno how long i would last, lol.
          My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread57916.html
          When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.

          Comment


          • My family was pretty abusive, too. You just have to let it go. Not easy to do. I had to attend 12-step meetings and lots of them.
            Female, 5'3", 50, Max squat: 202.5lbs. Max deadlift: 225 x 3.

            Comment


            • Leida, I was wondering about whether you have tried to eat sort of like PHD style and how you feel about starches. I think I saw you mention that someone else in your family does.
              IME they [starches] really help me feel satisfied for a long time. Much better compared to high fat or even high protein.
              I know you are avoiding nightshades for the time being, but perhaps this is something you want to look into sometime in the near future.

              Comment


              • Originally posted by Happy Paleo Girl View Post
                I've been following along and at this point don't have too much to add. I have my up and down days with how I feel about myself, and I am still trying to work on loving myself as I am right now (which of course is easier on the "up" days!).

                And YogaBare, I have been meaning to tell you for ages that I love your sig. I absolutely adore Bill Hicks (and psychadelics, for that matter!).

                And thanks for posting Choco's quote from the other thread, that's good stuff. I can definitely get behind caring for my greatest possession.
                Hey HPG, Good to see you're still with us As you've probably gathered from this thread - I know how you feel. Fwiw - I know it's only a head shot, but you look beautiful in your profile pic, and nothing in it would indicate that you've got an ounce of weight to lose. So I bet you look great in reality!

                Haha - yes, Bill Hicks is a legend. I'm hoping that by including him in my signature people will just assume I'm as cool as he is

                And speaking of sigs - I think I might put Chocos quote in mine. Definitely the most inspiring thing I've read in a long time. Unfortunately some dufus posted right after him, refuting everything he'd said but hey - this is life n MDA

                Originally posted by Leida View Post
                Heya, well, lookie what yahoo send us today, right on topic:

                Yahoo!

                And, thank you, YB!

                Yep, I am planning to start adding foods back once the inflammation stops running from one system to another as it did since the end of April. I am actually thinking I might not need to cut out nuts.

                Let me know how sprints are going. The rain started on my 9th wind-sprint, so I am officially back to sprinting. Dunno how long i would last, lol.
                In my journal we actually chatted a lot about photoshopping at one stage. Zoebird knows quite a lot about it and pointed a lot of things out that I never would have noticed before. Bascially all photos are photoshopped... But imho, in the link you posted, the model looks better in the original!

                And you're welcome Be proud of how far you've come.

                What is the inflammation you're talking about? I thoroughly recommend the daily sprinting for weight loss. I can't do it right now cos I'm travelling and I don't know if I'll have the energy when I get back, but it definitely shrunk my thighs very rapidly. I can't remember how it affected my appetite back then.

                Originally posted by sbhikes View Post
                My family was pretty abusive, too. You just have to let it go. Not easy to do. I had to attend 12-step meetings and lots of them.
                I'm on vacation with my parents at the moment, and it's amazing to observe how they are, without the emotional investment I had when I was younger. I feel quite sad for them.

                Originally posted by Graycat View Post
                Leida, I was wondering about whether you have tried to eat sort of like PHD style and how you feel about starches. I think I saw you mention that someone else in your family does.
                IME they [starches] really help me feel satisfied for a long time. Much better compared to high fat or even high protein.
                I know you are avoiding nightshades for the time being, but perhaps this is something you want to look into sometime in the near future.
                Not related to anything I'm quoting from you - just wanted to say you look smokin' in your new avatar Graycat!
                "I think the basic anti-aging diet is also the best diet for prevention and treatment of diabetes, scleroderma, and the various "connective tissue diseases." This would emphasize high protein, low unsaturated fats, low iron, and high antioxidant consumption, with a moderate or low starch consumption.

                In practice, this means that a major part of the diet should be milk, cheese, eggs, shellfish, fruits and coconut oil, with vitamin E and salt as the safest supplements."

                - Ray Peat

                Comment


                • Originally posted by statikcat View Post
                  dilberryhoundog Would you summarize the resulting actions of your theory to varying your food and macros often? I do that a bit currently but it is interesting the way you lay out the ideas behind it. Some days for lunch at work I will eat leftovers of groundbeed with butternut squash.. and the next day I might eat 400g of carbs from bananas and dates.

                  I also think this fits into more logical primal. As if primal ate high fat on a daily basis.. makes no sense to me. If a primitive tribe came across a field of tubers and pollen.. guess what they might not eat for weeks.. fat and much protein.
                  hey there statikcat, yeah i went into big detail to explain the reasons why i believe this protocol will work, back a page or so, it is post #200

                  http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum...ml#post1222232

                  but yeah thinking about how the body reacts to physical exercise and thinking back to groks day and imagining how he would've eaten was the defining factors in formulating this protocol. I will get to making a brand new thread up for people to discuss it all on instead of necroing yogabear's thread (sorry).

                  I'll leave ya's with a thought I had the other day:
                  I still eat alot of food, I have eaten much, much, much more food (in my primal journey) than a person would, whom is trying to lose 70lbs over 4 months by using a CI=CO protocol.
                  A little primal gem - My Success Story
                  Weight lost in 4 months - 29kg (64 lbs)

                  Comment


                  • hi Yogabear, diene and co, I started that new thread ya's suggested:

                    dilberryhoundog's whole 30 eating protocol
                    Last edited by dilberryhoundog; 06-16-2013, 04:44 AM.
                    A little primal gem - My Success Story
                    Weight lost in 4 months - 29kg (64 lbs)

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by YogaBare View Post

                      Not related to anything I'm quoting from you - just wanted to say you look smokin' in your new avatar Graycat!
                      You are being too nice, but TY I hope you are making the most of your trip

                      Comment


                      • Wow, I had lots of catching up to do!

                        Kudos to all those that have overcome negativity/abuse as a child. I never really suffered from body image, not until later in life but when I did, I realized it stemmed back to certain events from childhood. I did always try to instill in my kids, especially my daughters, their self-worth and beauty as a person and shelter them from bad things happening to them. Lord knows there are enough other things to worry about.

                        And it helps that they are beautiful but as far as I can tell, they have never lacked in confidence. They arent vain or conceited about their looks either, but they just ooze confidence, enthusiasm, and love of life, and love of family & friends, w/o dwelling on physical appearance. They do always eat right and stay active. I tried to teach them the things that I had to learn the hard way, since my mother died when I was 13, therefore there wasn't much time to teach me much of anything. And after she died, our diet and WOE went to sh*t. So I am hoping they have learned from my mistakes.

                        My youngest daughter, (27 today) has been with her husband for 10 years (not all married years) and they have 2 children and she just had a boudoir session done for him. OMGosh the pictures were beautiful and tastefully done, at least the ones she showed me haha. I can't share those, but I can take this opportunity to shamelessly brag on 2 of my 4 greatest accomplishments



                        65lbs gone and counting!!

                        Fat 2 Fit - One Woman's Journey

                        Comment


                        • You have a beautiful daughter.
                          Female, 5'3", 50, Max squat: 202.5lbs. Max deadlift: 225 x 3.

                          Comment


                          • Thanks, that is both of them actually. They are 19 months apart in age. The one in the blue, is normally a blonde but a few years ago, she went dark.
                            65lbs gone and counting!!

                            Fat 2 Fit - One Woman's Journey

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by gopintos View Post
                              Thanks, that is both of them actually. They are 19 months apart in age. The one in the blue, is normally a blonde but a few years ago, she went dark.
                              Gorgeous girls - congrads!

                              Originally posted by walkeith25
                              When is your book coming out




                              The spammers seem to be getting political...
                              "I think the basic anti-aging diet is also the best diet for prevention and treatment of diabetes, scleroderma, and the various "connective tissue diseases." This would emphasize high protein, low unsaturated fats, low iron, and high antioxidant consumption, with a moderate or low starch consumption.

                              In practice, this means that a major part of the diet should be milk, cheese, eggs, shellfish, fruits and coconut oil, with vitamin E and salt as the safest supplements."

                              - Ray Peat

                              Comment


                              • Thanks, that is both of them actually. They are 19 months apart in age. The one in the blue, is normally a blonde but a few years ago, she went dark.
                                Wow, all grown up & a credit to mom!

                                Leida, I was wondering about whether you have tried to eat sort of like PHD style and how you feel about starches. I think I saw you mention that someone else in your family does.
                                IME they [starches] really help me feel satisfied for a long time. Much better compared to high fat or even high protein.
                                I know you are avoiding nightshades for the time being, but perhaps this is something you want to look into sometime in the near future.
                                I sort of do. It wrecks my facial skin, but my digestion is picture-perfect. It might be better if I did not eat fruit, but I have traveled down that road and it's a dead-end for me. Everything really is, except for eating what I feel like when I feel like. In the end, I think it is unfortunately true, I was born to be plump, and plump I will remain no matter what I eat, if I do eat. Starvation is the only thing that helps, and it is hard to live starving when food is available.

                                YB, daily sprints means for me basically committing to this one form of exercise, and I am not gonna do that. I like lifting and my hapkido class. So, once a week is probably the best I can do in order to ensure that I am able to move every day of the week. Basically, even with one day of just walking, I now feel thoroughly worked/sore every night. I also find that I end up with pressure in my knees, borderline pain after sprinting + my favorite bunions. Really, I should swim, rather than run, but our pool only have 2 lanes for lane swim and you have to be there when I normally should be at work to get a reasonable swim. Sprints or running I can do at lunch, and you are the only person on the treadmill/elliptical whatever. Once gym renos are done, I am going to be doing more boxing in addition to hapkido, wrist permitting.

                                I know, I sound like a wreck, but that's why anti-inflammatory. I am thinking dropping nuts in July (gradually eliminating all inflammatory foods)

                                This week I was 134.6 Saturday morning, climbing up to 137 this morning. I think a lot of it is water retention, because Saturday and Sunday is lifting, hapkido + lots of yard work (hours and hours, lol). So dehydration+ muscle swelling... well, at least I hope so! Consuming 1/2 can of coconut milk was not exactly weight-loss friendly lol.

                                But you should see my yard! I am in year 3, and it is finally coming together & starting to mature. Haskaps made some berries, and they are turning purple, and I see fruit forming on plums (after all the nerve-wrecking literature on cross-pollination) ans strawberries had heavy blooms despite rains... though rains wiped out all the spinach and wrecked LaFrance's peony bloom (BUGGER!)
                                Last edited by Leida; 06-17-2013, 07:19 AM.
                                My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread57916.html
                                When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.

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