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I'm watching my father kill himself as we speak...

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  • #16
    Originally posted by Silvergirl View Post
    RitaRose..... why do you think that Paleo would fix your Mums ulcer? It has actually really exacerbated mine, so much so I think I will have to go to see a specialist again.
    If you could see her fridge, it's just a chemical shitstorm. Really awful stuff. She eats pretty much an all carb diet, including lots of whole grains for fiber. Argh!

    The problem is that she eats terrible food that's barely digestible, then that causes problems with bloating and acid reflux. From what I have seen growing up with her, I really think she has a major problem with grain intolerance, but she won't even see that as an possibility.

    The main problem I have with her isn't even really the food itself. She eats the supposed health food, she has acid reflux, then instead of changing what she eats so it doesn't happen, she just takes a Tums multiple times per day. At least she's off the PPI, but it means she's not only creating a never-ending cycle of acid reducing and then rebounding, but she's also creating the perfect environment for h. pylori to flourish. At the age of 77 and eating crap, her immune system isn't all it should be. Plus, she's a woman raised in a time when a proper woman didn't make a scene, so when a doctor tells her it's nothing, even if she feels like death warmed over, she just goes home and waits for it to go away. I have no clue how on earth she got a mouthy daughter like me...
    Durp.

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    • #17
      Originally posted by eKatherine View Post
      The problem is that they still think they're doing what's best. They think people who eat like us are nuts, and they should keep dutifully eating mostly carbs, injecting the insulin, and just accept that their condition will decline until they get so sick they die.
      Yes!

      They don't think "What I'm being told doesn't work", they think "There must be something really wrong with me".

      A few months ago, my mom wanted me to chastise my brother for "eating too much meat". When I told her I was the LAST person that would be telling him that, she decided we were both nuts and going to keel over any minute. It didn't even bother her that I've been healthy this whole time (other than the head injury, which obviously wasn't diet related) and that my brother isn't having colitis issues anymore. Meanwhile, she's constantly having health problems, and she's at least 20 years younger than any of my grandparents were when they died.
      Durp.

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      • #18
        Originally posted by Silvergirl View Post
        Yup, I get it that is where I mentioned that it is really hard to sit it out and say nothing, just lead by example. All you can do, but soooooooo frustrating. I have seen lots of different reactions to the diet, as I am sure you have.
        Oh yeah, I have definitely noticed my share of odd looks when I tell people about how I eat. It's why I aimless and less inclined to share the info. Which is a shame because so many people could use it.
        "The cling and a clang is the metal in my head when I walk. I hear a sort of, this tinging noise - cling clang. The cling clang. So many things happen while walking. The metal in my head clangs and clings as I walk - freaks my balance out. So the natural thought is just clogged up. Totally clogged up. So we need to unplug these dams, and make the the natural flow... It sort of freaks me out. We need to unplug the dams. You cannot stop the natural flow of thought with a cling and a clang..."

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        • #19
          Originally posted by Drumroll View Post
          Oh yeah, I have definitely noticed my share of odd looks when I tell people about how I eat. It's why I aimless and less inclined to share the info. Which is a shame because so many people could use it.
          I very seldom divulge the true nature of my diet to people. When asked what I do to stay in shape I usually say "You know, low-fat and high fiber with lots of cardio". People accept that and give you a thumbs up.

          Or, if you want to be truthful, just say "I watch what I eat and I exercise" That way you're telling the truth and they can fill in the blanks with whatever makes them feel good.
          "It's true, you are a good woman. Then again, you may be the antichrist."

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          • #20
            Originally posted by Drumroll View Post
            I suppose if you all have any ideas you can post 'me here, but I guess this is just another rant about family members who don't give a shit about their own health and how we always have to divorce ourselves from their own choices as ill conceived as they may be.
            I don't know if it's easier or harder when a family member is attempting to "eat healthy". My mom is deathly afraid of fat (except when she's indulging her sweet tooth, lol). She's a Type 2 diabetic who loves her "healthy whole grain" snacks. She's replaced 1% milk with an almond milk chemical brew that she thinks is better for her. The fact that I lost 70 lbs last year and never eat a "diet" food seems to have made no impression on her.

            Maybe it helps that I have a teenage daughter who is slowly considering how her food choices may impact her health. Doing whatever I can to help her avoid the mistakes I made is a million times more important to me than evangelizing my 75yo mother.

            But I feel your pain.
            50yo, 5'3"
            SW-195
            CW-125, part calorie counting, part transition to primal
            GW- Goals are no longer weight-related

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            • #21
              Originally posted by RitaRose View Post
              If you could see her fridge, it's just a chemical shitstorm. Really awful stuff. She eats pretty much an all carb diet, including lots of whole grains for fiber. Argh!

              The problem is that she eats terrible food that's barely digestible, then that causes problems with bloating and acid reflux. From what I have seen growing up with her, I really think she has a major problem with grain intolerance, but she won't even see that as an possibility.

              The main problem I have with her isn't even really the food itself. She eats the supposed health food, she has acid reflux, then instead of changing what she eats so it doesn't happen, she just takes a Tums multiple times per day. At least she's off the PPI, but it means she's not only creating a never-ending cycle of acid reducing and then rebounding, but she's also creating the perfect environment for h. pylori to flourish. At the age of 77 and eating crap, her immune system isn't all it should be. Plus, she's a woman raised in a time when a proper woman didn't make a scene, so when a doctor tells her it's nothing, even if she feels like death warmed over, she just goes home and waits for it to go away. I have no clue how on earth she got a mouthy daughter like me...
              I obviously think that getting her to eat a much better diet is the way to go I am just not feeling that an ulcer may react well to that necessarily, great if it does. But I am very strict Paleo with the addition of removing eggs and dairy. I am on a PPI now because I have pain with it everyday. Even the PPI isn't working fully anymore. I am a bit nervous of going to the specialist as I think he/she will say the excess fat and protein are making it a lot worse. Then what the heck would I eat.......? But yes, even so I would still encourage you Mum to at least start trying to only eat real, unprocessed foods.
              Started Primal June 2012 at 148.5lbs, and 5' 1", reached goal weight in 5 months.
              Lowest weight 93lbs - too thin. Now stable at around 100lbs much better weight for me at my age.
              Primal, minus eggs, dairy and a myriad of other allergens.

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              • #22
                I hear ya. I have family members who do the same thing. I also work closely with what I refer to as "The Walking Dead". White men, age 50 plus, grossly obese, hipless, and sedentary. They'll be miserable and taking dirt naps within 10 years, and don't give a damn.

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                • #23
                  Take him to a nursing facility and introduce him to someone with diabetes living with an amputation, constant infection and so weakened that a feeding tube is required. Because eventually with diabetes, it starts killing you, even with meds. Miserable way to die. Watching my father go through these cycles and it's heartbreaking.

                  http://maggiesfeast.wordpress.com/
                  Check out my blog. Hope to share lots of great recipes and ideas!

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                  • #24
                    Sorry to hear. It is sad to say, but family are just as receptive to lifestyle change as complete strangers. Change has to start within. It's like telling someone a hundred times to quit smoking when that person has no plans of stopping.

                    Comment


                    • #25
                      Originally posted by ilovesteak View Post
                      I very seldom divulge the true nature of my diet to people. When asked what I do to stay in shape I usually say "You know, low-fat and high fiber with lots of cardio". People accept that and give you a thumbs up.
                      LOL, I've long suspected people who are in shape do very differently than what they say they do.

                      Comment


                      • #26
                        Originally posted by Drumroll View Post
                        I'm definitely the crazy one in his mind, no doubt about that!
                        You could buy him a serious book, like Weston Price "Nutrition and Physical Degeneration". It's hard to say that classic is crazy. The book illustrates the devastating impact of your dads sugar and pasta diet.

                        My mom read it, she's smart, she gets it, then she continues to live on jello and ice cream. LOL.

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                        • #27
                          Mom had TypeII diabetes. Five foot five; 273 pounds. Doctors told her to eat oatmeal for breakfast. Whole grains, etc. I questioned the logic of this, but it was before I'd done the research. She died at age 74 - 11 years younger than her mother and 13 years younger than her father had died. Her doctor was the biggest waste of tuition that ever lived. All I could do after the fact was to write her a letter telling her so. Most Gen'l practioners, family practioners, and geriatric practioners are a waste of skin and oxygen.

                          I know - bitter much?
                          "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

                          B*tch-lite

                          Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

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                          • #28
                            Originally posted by JoanieL View Post
                            Mom had TypeII diabetes. Five foot five; 273 pounds. Doctors told her to eat oatmeal for breakfast. Whole grains, etc. I questioned the logic of this, but it was before I'd done the research. She died at age 74 - 11 years younger than her mother and 13 years younger than her father had died. Her doctor was the biggest waste of tuition that ever lived. All I could do after the fact was to write her a letter telling her so. Most Gen'l practioners, family practioners, and geriatric practioners are a waste of skin and oxygen.

                            I know - bitter much?
                            With the assistance of my mother's doctor, she put my father on a fat free skim milk and whole grain diet, on the premise that an 80 year old man can never get down to target weight too fast. He lost over 100 pounds and his memory before dying from Parkinson's.

                            Yeah, I blame them.

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              Originally posted by Silvergirl View Post
                              It is odd how some people are so fascinated by the diet, but for them to do it is totally not going to happen. I was talking to an internal medicine specialist yesterday, who said she saw a Naturopath who told her to stop having gluten, dairy and I think eggs, just like me. She dismissed it saying "what would I eat?" I pointed her to Paleo and said that if she gave them up for 30 days she would feel so much better that she would find it easy. She did admit that if she had dairy she was totally exhausted the next day. I think she may look into it again. All we can do it sew seeds and hope they take. It really is so frustrating seeing our families make all the same mistakes, and really hard to sit it out and say nothing. It just seems to make people mad.

                              RitaRose..... why do you think that Paleo would fix your Mums ulcer? It has actually really exacerbated mine, so much so I think I will have to go to see a specialist again.
                              Silvergirl, I started eating Primal as part of the cure to my ulcer. I ate GAPS for two weeks, then transitioned to primal. Lacto-fermented veggies (Bubbies and homemade) and aloe vera turned mine around. I had to give up drinking coffee five times a day, and still have issues if I drink it (so maybe I am not completely healed?), but I am mountains better. I never thought I had leaky gut issues until they started to heal.

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                              • #30
                                Originally posted by Silvergirl View Post
                                I obviously think that getting her to eat a much better diet is the way to go I am just not feeling that an ulcer may react well to that necessarily, great if it does. But I am very strict Paleo with the addition of removing eggs and dairy. I am on a PPI now because I have pain with it everyday. Even the PPI isn't working fully anymore. I am a bit nervous of going to the specialist as I think he/she will say the excess fat and protein are making it a lot worse. Then what the heck would I eat.......? But yes, even so I would still encourage you Mum to at least start trying to only eat real, unprocessed foods.
                                I'm sure we'll never know if it works for her. She's sticking with the chemical food like glue. She had the course of antibiotics and everything else that goes with it, so she supposedly has gotten rid of the h. pylori that causes the ulcers, but it could still come back. She's making her body the perfect environment for it by always keeping her acid low.

                                Have you looked at Chris Kresser's articles about acid reflux and GERD? You probably have, but I thought I would mention it just in case.

                                Chris Kresser - Heartburn and GERD

                                I was on a PPI for a while (pain so bad the ER ran an EKG and ended up giving me morphine - and I have a very high pain threshold). I was taking Prilosec for about a month, and the pain kept getting worse as well as more frequent. I listened to some random woman on a local channel who suggested taking apple cider vinegar and avoiding PPIs and antacids. Seemed completely ridiculous to me, but I tried it and I haven't had any trouble at all since. The vast majority of the time it's an issue of too little acid, which seems truly bizarre if you can feel it burning your innards.
                                Durp.

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