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Dumb argument with my friend... Thoughts?

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  • #31
    Originally posted by Drumroll View Post
    Hah, truth. But to some people, food is just such an important sacred cow that to say anything contrary to their beliefs is to invite trouble.
    True. But my health is the most important sacred cow of them all. No one better F**K with it! LOL!

    My guess is, other than this pho issue, he's a cool guy? You want to keep him around?

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    • #32
      Originally posted by zoebird View Post
      According to wiki, the term "pho" could also come from the cantonese word for noodle -- fun -- not necessarily from the french broth component, though that is also an interesting idea. Perhaps it is both -- pho refers to both the broth and the noodles.

      I don't know why he got so offended. Perhaps he is also on the spectrum. Spectrum folks hold things to be quite precious, right? Anyway, it's a strange thing.

      I get pho so rarely that I do eat the noodles. In fact, it's a special treat to go out and get pho or even thai noodle soups that are available here. . . or any noodle soup for that matter. Since rice is no big deal to me -- and I eat it so rarely -- it's just extra special.
      Don't get me wrong, normally I eat the noodles, but today I wanted to try a variation and he got all uppity about it. Kinda like, "don't mess with the Vietnamese guy who's the expert on pho here." As if because I am white, I couldn't POSSIBLY have any sort of respectable or knowledgeable opinion on pho at ALL. Totally rude.

      And he said pho translates to "noodle broth" so the combination of the two terms would seem to be the case. But he was implying that because pho means "NOODLE broth" and not just "broth", it MUST have the noodles or it is not pho at all.

      And from my experiences with him, I doubt he's on the spectrum. He's normally WAY too sociable and outgoing for that...
      Last edited by Drumroll; 12-13-2012, 08:57 PM.
      "The cling and a clang is the metal in my head when I walk. I hear a sort of, this tinging noise - cling clang. The cling clang. So many things happen while walking. The metal in my head clangs and clings as I walk - freaks my balance out. So the natural thought is just clogged up. Totally clogged up. So we need to unplug these dams, and make the the natural flow... It sort of freaks me out. We need to unplug the dams. You cannot stop the natural flow of thought with a cling and a clang..."

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      • #33
        Ok, so it's not pho. Big deal?

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        • #34
          Originally posted by zoebird View Post
          Ok, so it's not pho. Big deal?
          I said that it's close enough, so what's the big deal if I call it pho. I mean he's the Vietnamese guy and even he couldn't give me a name for the noodleless pho, so what else was I going to call it?

          Besides, it was still amazing. I nommed that whole thing down even if it bothered him the whole time.
          "The cling and a clang is the metal in my head when I walk. I hear a sort of, this tinging noise - cling clang. The cling clang. So many things happen while walking. The metal in my head clangs and clings as I walk - freaks my balance out. So the natural thought is just clogged up. Totally clogged up. So we need to unplug these dams, and make the the natural flow... It sort of freaks me out. We need to unplug the dams. You cannot stop the natural flow of thought with a cling and a clang..."

          Comment


          • #35
            i think 'canh' means soup in vietnamese, so that's probably close enough.

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            • #36
              Originally posted by zoebird View Post
              i think 'canh' means soup in vietnamese, so that's probably close enough.
              True, although I've read the broth is made in a special way unique to pho and I would have been having that style of broth I suppose.
              "The cling and a clang is the metal in my head when I walk. I hear a sort of, this tinging noise - cling clang. The cling clang. So many things happen while walking. The metal in my head clangs and clings as I walk - freaks my balance out. So the natural thought is just clogged up. Totally clogged up. So we need to unplug these dams, and make the the natural flow... It sort of freaks me out. We need to unplug the dams. You cannot stop the natural flow of thought with a cling and a clang..."

              Comment


              • #37
                I'm Vietnamese and I can't stand pho. Overrated POS. we have so many superior food in our cuisine.
                F 28/5'4/100 lbs

                "I'm not a psychopath, I'm a high-functioning sociopath; do your research."

                Comment


                • #38
                  Your friend is an idiot, plain and simple. There's no reason to get all worked up about that, it's not like you were making him order his the same way.Maybe make fun of you or joke about it? sure, but to actually get mad?? I wouldn't waste a second stressing over this if I were you.

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                  • #39
                    Originally posted by sbhikes View Post
                    I had pho once. I don't remember any noodles. I remember a little bit of vegetables and some meat balls. It was not good. I've never had pho ever again. I really don't see why people like it.
                    i'm guessing what you ate wasn't actually pho

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                    • #40
                      to the OP, your friend may have overreacted, but i'm guessing that you actually did offend him. and probably the waitress and the chef as well. if you're going to a pho restaurant, eat the pho. if you're going to a vietnamese restaurant, order something else from the menu.

                      also, they are rice noodles. eat them and enjoy them. there really aren't any nasties in white rice. it's pretty harmless stuff.

                      i see this type of post over and over on this forum and it drives me nuts. unless you have a serious medical condition, don't let arbitrary dietary choices get in the way of real life. i eat pretty damn clean 99% of the time, but if i'm out near my favorite neopolitan brick oven pizza place, i'm eating pizza that night. if i go to a vietnamese reataurant, i'm eating pho. no reason to offend a friend, a waitress, a chef and a culture. for all you people who are suck sticklers for the rules, remember even mark preaches 80/20
                      Last edited by not on the rug; 12-14-2012, 07:26 AM.

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                      • #41
                        Seriously, how can you offend the chef and the waitress from ordering YOUR food in the way that YOU want it? If I go to a burger joint and order my burger without the bun or remove it before eating it, should expect the waiter and chef to be offended too??? Or is it just because we're talking about vietnamese cousine?

                        I could understand that they would get mad if I ask them to completely change the dish (although, they could just say that it can't be changed instead of getting offended), but to get offended over changing the ammount of noodles and meat on my soup?? come on...

                        However, I do agree with you on enjoying food ocationally without getting hung up on wether it's primal or not, but I do save those for food that I really crave or that can't be made paleo without detracting from it, if I enjoy pho without the noodles then I sure as heck am not going to waste a cheat meal just because it "should have noodles" in it.

                        I love the 80-20 rule .
                        Last edited by jaczor; 12-14-2012, 08:23 AM.

                        Comment


                        • #42
                          I think basically every reply on this thread missed the most important point. Nobody should try to force you to eat a certain way, but that isn't exactly what I'd call this. It's just a culture mismatch.

                          Eastern and western cultures have different ideas and paradigms that are sometimes so deeply ingrained that we assume they are universal. Specifically, western culture is very focused on the self. When you go to a restaurant, their job is to give you what you want because you are there to fulfill yourself. Some eastern cultures (although I'm not sure about Vietnamese) view it differently and there is, for lack of a better term, a "right way" to do things. This often happens with food and drink.

                          I remember hearing a radio piece about a woman's visit to Japan where she wanted her green tea sweetened with honey...
                          "Green tea is not drunk that way"
                          "But that's how I like mine"
                          "Ah, you have been doing it wrong. We will teach you how to prepare it properly"

                          So, when you said you'd go get Pho with him, it's likely he had something very specific in mind. Just like when you say you'll drink green tea with your Japanese friend, they don't expect you to put honey in it. You weren't wrong, except to assume that their culture is like ours. It's a common mistake that I've made a lot when spending time with my asian friends/girlfriend.

                          So swallow your pride and apologize, even though you've done nothing wrong. Admit that you didn't understand his culture, explain yours, and offer in the future to try things his way. Or at the least be mindful of what he means when he invites you somewhere.

                          Comment


                          • #43
                            When my great grandmother made her version of "pizza," it wasn't like anything we think of as pizza. Sometimes there wasn't any tomato sauce on it. Just greens, olive oil, and some parmesan. If I got my panties in a wad every time someone referred to mainstream pizza as pizza, it would be stupid.

                            However, I do occasionally feel a tightening of that wad when people think chain store pizza is good (i.e. Domino's, etc.).

                            OP, your friend may have a stick lodged in a very uncomfortable place.
                            "Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

                            B*tch-lite

                            Who says back fat is a bad thing? Maybe on a hairy guy at the beach, but not on a crab.

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                            • #44
                              Originally posted by NowhereMan View Post
                              I think basically every reply on this thread missed the most important point. Nobody should try to force you to eat a certain way, but that isn't exactly what I'd call this. It's just a culture mismatch.

                              Eastern and western cultures have different ideas and paradigms that are sometimes so deeply ingrained that we assume they are universal. Specifically, western culture is very focused on the self. When you go to a restaurant, their job is to give you what you want because you are there to fulfill yourself. Some eastern cultures (although I'm not sure about Vietnamese) view it differently and there is, for lack of a better term, a "right way" to do things. This often happens with food and drink.

                              I remember hearing a radio piece about a woman's visit to Japan where she wanted her green tea sweetened with honey...
                              "Green tea is not drunk that way"
                              "But that's how I like mine"
                              "Ah, you have been doing it wrong. We will teach you how to prepare it properly"

                              So, when you said you'd go get Pho with him, it's likely he had something very specific in mind. Just like when you say you'll drink green tea with your Japanese friend, they don't expect you to put honey in it. You weren't wrong, except to assume that their culture is like ours. It's a common mistake that I've made a lot when spending time with my asian friends/girlfriend.

                              So swallow your pride and apologize, even though you've done nothing wrong. Admit that you didn't understand his culture, explain yours, and offer in the future to try things his way. Or at the least be mindful of what he means when he invites you somewhere.
                              I would do that, except the guy's been living stateside his whole life. He knows and understands our culture just fine. In fact, I'd bet he knows it better than I do. He's certainly had more success navigating than I have!

                              I'm honestly shocked by his behavior, but I guess I shouldn't be? I don't know at this point. I mean, it was SO unlike him in any way that I've known him to be before.

                              I guess his Asian culture could have been at play, but it seems to me, the fact that it was in particular, his food culture may be the more likely explanation. I don't know what it is about food but people seem to defend their food culture stronger than almost anything else. I should have known better than to second guess it.

                              I've noticed more and more since going primal, just how much of a sacred cow food is to some people, and how easy it is to offend them even with three simple words, "no thank you."
                              "The cling and a clang is the metal in my head when I walk. I hear a sort of, this tinging noise - cling clang. The cling clang. So many things happen while walking. The metal in my head clangs and clings as I walk - freaks my balance out. So the natural thought is just clogged up. Totally clogged up. So we need to unplug these dams, and make the the natural flow... It sort of freaks me out. We need to unplug the dams. You cannot stop the natural flow of thought with a cling and a clang..."

                              Comment


                              • #45
                                In comparison to other Asian cultures, like Japan or china, we Vietnamese are considerably less formal. My guess is that your friend got so analyst because he wanted to show you an authentic experience and you resisted it and tried to do things your own way. I get pissy too whenever I take a friend out for sushi and the moron ends up ordering teriyaki chicken.
                                F 28/5'4/100 lbs

                                "I'm not a psychopath, I'm a high-functioning sociopath; do your research."

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